Comments on: Dear First Born, It’s not you, it’s me.

By: wonderoak

wonderoak — Thu, 27 Sep 2018 02:25:59 +0000

In reply to Becky. Awe wow, thank you so much for sharing that with me

By: Becky

Becky — Wed, 26 Sep 2018 03:56:24 +0000

I read this few years ago when you first posted. I had my son when I was 19 failing after 26 hours to give natural birth. His 13 now and I remember this at times. I have read this blog (maybe the only one ever) about 5 times in these last few years. Its so true, so hard but thank you for growing up with me is the best punchline for anything ever. I cry uncontrollably in last 15 seconds of reading, everytime with the feeling of understanding (always changing), wisdom (ever changing) and of course love (never changing).. Thank you.

By: To My Firstborn - It's Not You. It's Me. - Perfection Pending

To My Firstborn - It's Not You. It's Me. - Perfection Pending — Wed, 28 Mar 2018 03:02:19 +0000

[…] This post originally appeared on The Wonderoak Blog […]

By: Tammy Bolt Werthem

Tammy Bolt Werthem — Thu, 25 Jan 2018 01:51:39 +0000

you are beautiful in what you say, how you live and love. keep writing, keep pouring yourself out even when your heart is torn wide open. thank you. i relate

By: Karen@LightlyFrayed

Karen@LightlyFrayed — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 22:34:27 +0000

Um. Yes to all of this. Going through some rocky roads with my firstborn. He is pulling away and pushing – hard. Struggling to show the unconditional love in a way that will break some of those barriers. This is new territory as we have always been quite close. Wondering (as all Moms do) how much of this comes from expecting too much from my firstborn. Trying not to wonder and simply put one foot in front of the other. 15 is hard. Thank you for these words.

By: Dear First Born – Ava's Adventures

Dear First Born – Ava's Adventures — Sat, 22 Jul 2017 17:33:42 +0000

[…] https://wonderoak.com/2016/04/25/dear-first-born-its-not-you-its-me/ […]

By: wonderoak

wonderoak — Sat, 27 May 2017 14:31:24 +0000

In reply to Jane. Thanks so much for sharing this

By: Jane

Jane — Sat, 27 May 2017 10:32:27 +0000

I’m usually more of a lurker, than a commenter, but I just had to let you know, how much I love your blog! You have an amazing gift, and so eloquently put into words, what so many moms are feeling!!
I am positive, there are thousands more, (than have commented here), who are nodding their heads, with tears rolling down their faces, agreeing whole heartedly with you! Thank you for being so honest and vulnerable… it is a blessing to know, we moms, are not alone in our fears and our struggles.

It is sad to me, how hard it is for most women, to give ourselves permission to make mistakes and to not be perfect… to not beat ourselves up, when we fail to be everything for everyone. Thankfully, we love our “perfectly imperfect” children unconditionally, and as Mamad (and you) have said, thankfully they forgive us quickly, as we need to be able to do for ourselves.
My sons are now, 17, & 15 and I still second guess myself and my parenting skills, daily… but then I look at the relationship I have with them, and the wonderful young adults they are becoming… and I realize that, I have done some things right!
I love the quote ” I may not be perfect, but when I look at my children, I know I got something perfectly right”…which is something I am sure, eventually, many moms, say to themselves… so don’t worry… you are a great mama, and your kids will be fine… you got this!!
xo

By: Mary

Mary — Wed, 10 May 2017 11:43:41 +0000

My oldest will be 31 on the 21st. I made my mistakes on my first one. Ya know he turned out wonderful. He is married two children a bachelors and Master’s. I’m so proud of the man he has become. Don’t worry ladies.. The mistakes you make, They truly make it, any mess ups you d9

By: Renita Demarest

Renita Demarest — Fri, 28 Apr 2017 23:17:23 +0000

I love this. So true. Amanda, you have no worries. You are one of the best mothers I know.