Well, well.  Look who is finally hopping on to show off Gio’s newborn pictures on his 7th month birthday.  Let’s just say it’s not too easy finding spare time after you’ve had your third baby, ha!  

In all seriousness I am so in love with each and every one of these photos but I may be even more in love with the story behind them.  You see, Gio was born early at 36W5D.  And he landed himself a rather stressful 8 days in the NICU.  When I say stressful, I mean stressful.  Between him being at the hospital, recovering from my 3rd c-section and having 2 other kids who needed me the LAST thing on my brain was his newborn pictures.  

One morning I got a Facebook message from a sweet friend.  Congratulating me on the birth of Gio and reaching out as a fellow NICU mom to offer her support as she remembers sitting in those rocking chairs.  She told me that a good friend of hers was a photographer and wanted her to contact me and offer a complimentary newborn session as she too was the mom of a NICU warrior.  I am not going to lie I did a double take.  I almost didn’t believe it.  There had to be a catch.  Why would this photographer whom I didn’t even know offer to spend her time photographing my newborn son?  

Why? 

Because her heart is 10x the size of anyone else I know. 

That’s why.

I contacted the photographer, Alissa Delucca and we chatted for a while as if we were old friends.  Kids on both sides blaring in the background and the conversation just flowed.  She asked me all about Gio and what he was staying in the NICU for.  And she genuinely cared.  She explained that because she remembers what a struggle those NICU days were for her, when she heard from her friend that Gio was born early she had it in her heart to reach out and offer to take his photographs for me. 

Did I not tell you how big her heart is?

She invited me to her studio and told me not to worry, she would have everything I needed.  When I arrived, I was a complete mess.  Gio had just woken up (not a good start to a newborn shoot), I was hungry and tired and looked like I hadn’t slept in a month.  Her studio was quite possibly the cutest place I had ever visited.  Halos, flowers, hats and wraps in every color were hanging from the wall.  Gorgeous photographs staring down at me.  Quiet, calm and complete perfection.  She immediately shushed me as I apologized for being late, having no make up on and for Gio, who I was terrified would not sleep a wink for her.  She scooped him into her arms, and told me to sit and drink hot coffee and have snacks while she worked her magic.  You guys…hot coffee and snacks.  Literally a new mom’s dream come true.  

So I sat and watched her work.  She wrapped and soothed my baby.  She posed him perfectly.  He slept.  He didn’t sleep.  I prayed he wouldn’t poop on any of her adorable outfits.  We chatted.  It was really such a great morning. 

When we were all through she showed me a wall of photographs behind a curtain.  She invited me back for my reveal and explained that when I got there she would have the curtains drawn.  She would then pull the curtains back revealing row after row of printed and matted photo for me to fall in love with.  And I did just that. 

A couple of weeks later I returned and got to experience my reveal.  My mom came with me for the ride and we both stood there and stared at all these photos of a perfect, tiny, magnificent little boy.  My little boy.  Naturally I had to have the entire display, ha!  My mom purchased the reveal for me as a baby gift and I have since created a similar display to hang in Gio’s nursery.  My favorite part about it is that when I am ready to take them off the wall (if ever!) I can place all the photos right into the box they came in and it is the perfect keepsake.  

Alissa proves to me that there are still good people out there.  Who act out of kindness without expecting anything in return.  I will forever be grateful for her heart and her talent.   

XO, Danielle

I love to connect with my readers on social media, so feel free to share this with a friend, pin it, and find me on Instagram and Facebook.

And just for the record — This is not a sponsored post by any means.  Alissa didn’t even know I was a blogger until we chatted on the phone.  She offered herself and her services to us simply out of the goodness of her heart.  She is a good person with a heart of gold.  She gifted me with the photography session and a bunch of digital files of my choosing just because she felt lead to do so.  I wanted to share her amazing photos and the experience I had with her with all of you.  I hope you enjoy the photographs as much as we do.  

Alissa’s studio is located in Boca Raton, Florida and you can find her here!

I had this wild notion to breastfeed my 3rd baby.  Before you get all twisted at the thought of “wild notion” let me explain.  The idea of breastfeeding to me was and still is a bit wild.  As in wild animals.  Dairy farms.  Nursing pups.  Baboons on display at the zoo with babies hanging from their nipples.  Wild.  Now before you start on the breast is best commentary, come on down from your righteous throne and get over it.  Not everyone feels that way. 

Fed is best. 

Period. 

You won’t win that argument here.

My babies have been fed formula, pumped milk and now exclusively breast fed and honestly they all cry and whine and I’m sure they’ll all grow up to similar degrees of crazy so let’s just agree to feed our babies and leave it at that. 

K, thanks.  

So where were we.  I decided to breastfeed baby 3 for a number of reasons.  All my babies were c sections and a small part of me feels like I may have missed something in the delivery that may have made me feel…a little more heroic.  I mean, you have moms pushing babies out of their VAGINAS and I’m over here with my hair blown out on an operating table asking them for a xanax cocktail through my IV.  And as sad as I may be about missing out on my babies trip down the birth canal, my vagina is still in tact so there’s a silver lining. 

However my fear of missing out on important life experiences made me realize that if I didn’t try to breastfeed baby 3 I would never have another opportunity.  That and the promise google made to me that my uterus would shrink at a record pace.  Spoiler alert, googles a liar. 

A dirty, rotten liar.  

So I made the decision to try to breastfeed.  It went like this “ok boobs.  We’re gonna give this a go.  Don’t look at me like that, I don’t think I’ll like it either.  You either step up to the plate or sit on the sidelines but I can promise you that if you don’t give it your all on the first shot we are calling game and headed back home to our comfort zone”. 

I was feeling pretty good about myself and my decision until we got to the hospital.  I immediately got asked the number one question.  Breast or bottle feeding?  The nurse just stared at me with those pleading, “please say breast because it just makes the world a better place” eyes.  Breast it was.  But I just want to know why they are so damn nosy about all of it.  I mean, here I am hiding behind my curtain.  Trying to maintain the 1/2 an ounce of dignity I have left since someone came in every 4 hours during the night to change my wee wee pad and spray my privates with warm water.  And all I can hear is “did he latch?  How’s he doing?”. 

And the panic sets in.

At this point I am literally shoving my nipple into the babies mouth.  The baby is reaching up with his mouth wide open similar to a seal at feeding time, yet this guy isn’t catching any fish.  I’m shoving, he’s missing.  Nurse Nosy is still on the other side of the curtain playing a rapid fire game of 20 questions.  Just when I started to literally drip sweat and curse and threaten that if the baby didn’t latch in another 20 seconds I would be submitting my paperwork to the Similac strong moms webpage and going to feed him a bottle, he latched. 

And so our breastfeeding journey began.

 One of the best parts about breastfeeding besides the obvious health benefits is that it’s freeeeeee.  And trust me I know plenty of “if it’s free it’s for me moms” that breastfeed primarily for this purpose.  (I was hoping for the miraculously shrinking uterus but we will touch on that later.). I just want to be the first to let you know that the whole promise of free… falls flat.  Flat on its face in the nursing aisle at target as you’re tossing these items into your cart.

Nursing pads: because your sick of walking around with big old wet spots on your shirt and shoving toilet paper in your bra is so middle school.

Nipple cream: because no one told you that achieving that perfect latch can also feel like 38 million of the tiniest and sharpest knives exiting your nipples.  Oh, and not to mention things crack and bleed and blister.  And yeah, I’m not talking about your heels in the winter.  I’m still talking about your poor, sweet nipples.  They will take a beating.  And you will pay any amount of money to numb them.

Milk producing aides: maybe your lucky to be able to nurse your baby 8 times a day and still manage to pump 20 oz to build up a freezer stash.  Maybe you’ve been blessed by the gods in the milky heavens.  However if you weren’t, which I assume many are not…you will find yourself eating certain foods to “up” your production.  Things are going well you think but then you see those mamas posting pictures of their stash in the Facebook pages.  Suddenly you have this competitive need to pump enough milk to feed every infant in your town.  No, your entire state.  So in go the supplements.  drops, chews, drinks, cookies.  Challenge accepted.

And just when you think your cart is finally full don’t forget to grab that nursing cover, because god forbid someone know what’s going on under there // a nursing bra, because yes you will have to leave the house and wear a bra at some point // milk freezer bags, to store all that extra supply obviously // and set a reminder to order all new pump parts because you could swear you read somewhere to change them out every few months.  

Another fun breastfeeding fact is that you can throw your schedule out the window.  I am hardly a type A but I do like my babies on a schedule.  Eat at 8, sleep at 10, repeat all day until bedtime.  But no.  Breastfeeding is an entirely different animal.  It’s more along the lines of eat, eat, eat, cry to eat, eat more, snack time, eat because the snack wasn’t enough, eat, eat, eat and bedtime.  Bedtime of course means another 3 maybe 4 meals.

I mean.  Oh my word!  There is really no point to wearing a shirt in the beginning.  And I promise you it’s normal to google things such as:

“Why does my baby nurse constantly?”

“Can my baby really be this hungry?”

“Can someone please explain the nursing benefits to me again because I would really love to take a shower without a baby hanging from my boob?”

And the answers? 

It’s for comfort, growth spurt, developmental learning.  

Great.  So I’m a human pacifier to the fastest growing baby who will one day cure cancer.

I guess I can live with that.

But honestly speaking, how can we forget to talk about the bond.  No one can describe or explain that one.  It’s a try it for yourself and see.  It’s why I forgot everything that I wrote above and kept on nursing past my goal.  It’s a feeling that your baby has needs that only you can fulfill and while it can and will be exhausting it’s also extremely gratifying.   Those sweet nursing moments sitting in a big chair with only a lamp on for light will be memories that I will never forget. 

And trust me, I didn’t think I would be able to do it. 

I didn’t think I would be physically able to handle being the only person able to do every feeding with 2 other kids running around.  Or have the guts to nurse in public.  I tell you, no one was as shocked as I was to be sitting on a public bench with a baby on my boob.   But you’ll sort of just become a total mama bear, or perhaps mama cow fits better.  You will surprise yourself in what you are capable of.  And you will be so happy that you did it.

So yes, breastfeeding definitely has more to it then the pamphlets in labor and delivery let on.  The ups and downs will leave you exhausted and you will want to quit all of the time.  But you won’t.  And when you do, you will cry.  I can promise you that.  My only hope is that you have a smooth sailing journey nursing journey.  That you let the good outweigh the bad, that your nipples don’t bleed and that you produce more milk then a dairy farm.  Oh and that your uterus shrinks at a rapid pace.  Because if you haven’t guessed, mine did not and so I pray you are one of the chosen ones. 

So go on, give your girls a little pep talk and good luck!

XO Danielle

I love to connect with my readers on social media, so feel free to share this with a friend, pin it, and find me on Instagram and Facebook.