After our fourth child was born, my husband and I didn’t have a date night for nearly a year. Which sounds like it could be a recipe for marriage problems.

Because couples who never take time away to be alone tend to feel disconnected. They might start snipping at each other over small things. They might forget why they started on this wild, chaotic parenting journey together and begin to feel more like roommates than life partners.

Research shows that says date night is an important ingredient for a healthy marriage—in science speak, they call it shared recreation. According to the The Date Night Opportunity report, wives who had regular date nights were 22 percent more likely to report being “very happy” in their marriage, and husbands were 20 percent more likely to. Plus, spouses who experience frequent date nights were 28 percent more likely to report that divorce “was not at all likely” in the future, compared to spouses with infrequent date nights.

Date night is especially important when you have kids—because how else will you get to have an actual conversation with your partner without someone asking for help with homework, interrupting to tell you about the coolest thing ever in Minecraft, or screaming so loud you’re sure the neighbors will call the cops on you?

And yet, even though my husband and I had been skipping date night for a while, and even with four kids to wrangle, we felt more connected than ever.

Because we did something different than date night.

But First, Here’s the Problem With Date Night

If you don’t have family in town, “date night” is synonymous with “hire a babysitter,” and that can get awfully expensive. Dropping 50 to 100 bucks just to get time alone with each other stings a bit, especially if you’re on a tight budget.

Even if you do have family in town, they have their own lives to live and aren’t going to be available just because you happen to be in the mood for a date night.

But that’s not even the biggest problem with date night.

After spending all day feeding four hungry mouths, refereeing sibling squabbles and mediating emotional outbursts, running errands to keep stocked on toilet paper and more food for those hungry little mouths, and and and…

As parents, by the end of the day, we’re done.

But date night means right when you’re at your most spent, you have to get all gussied up and be on your A game with your partner. When all you really want is to throw on your comfiest pair of jammies, grab a pint of pistachio ice cream, and zone out to the latest episode of The Voice.

As Parents, We Have to Get Creative

My husband and I found an alternative to date night that doesn’t cost 100 bucks, doesn’t have to happen when we’re at our most exhausted, and still leaves us feeling all lovey-dovey.

During that first year after our youngest was born, instead of date nights, we did lunch dates.

We were able to have an entire conversation without being interrupted. We could make googly eyes at each other without the kids walking up and asking, “Why does your face look so weird?”. We could even indulge in actual swear words instead of “fudgesicle,” “poop nugget,” and “son of a biscuit eater.”

If you’ve never considered a lunch date before, you might be intrigued by the idea, or you might be wondering how that could possibly work for your situation.

But Whatever You Do, Do Something

If a lunch date isn’t feasible for you, that’s okay! In this article, I’ve compiled the best date night ideas for parents.

It doesn’t matter which date night idea you try, but it does matter that you try—and make it something new. Research shows that connecting one-on-one is essential to a healthy relationship, but for the biggest boost to your bond, novel experiences are key. Repeating the same date night once a month can become a mundane routine and won’t deliver the same increase in relationship satisfaction.

And I can tell you from personal experience that making time to try out something new on date night—even when you’re busy and exhausted—will pay off.

Here’s What Date Night Can Do For You

After being together for well over a decade, my husband and I are just as into each other as ever. But when we go through a stressful period and don’t make time for a date night (in lunch form or otherwise), the disconnection creeps in, sucking our patience dry and souring our tone of voice with each other.

So when that happens, I pull up this list of parent date ideas that I’ve been keeping on my phone, and we pick something to try.

Even if all we have is a few minutes to spare for our date, we walk away feeling reconnected. Like we’re a team. A team that just so happens to possess a special talent for using impromptu hugs and kisses to gross out their teenager.

What to Do About Childcare

If we’re talking about date nights for parents, we need to address the (expensive) elephant in the room: Babysitters can be pricey, and finding a reliable sitter can turn into a project and a half.

Here are a few creative ways to handle childcare so that you can make space for regular date nights with your partner:

• When you both work outside the home: Meet up for a day date during work hours. Schedule a “doctor’s appointment” if you need to—what your boss doesn’t know won’t hurt ’em!
• When one person works and the other stays home with the kids: If your kids aren’t in school, ask a fellow stay-at-home parent if they would be up for a swap. You watch their kids for an hour and a half, they watch your kids for an hour and a half—and you both get a much needed boost for your relationships without springing for a sitter.
• If your kids have quiet time: If you’ve got a quiet time routine in your family (or if your kids are still napping), co-opt that time for your couple connection time.
• If your kids are in school or daycare: Schedule a day date while the kids are away. Or if you can’t afford an hour or two, set your alarm a little earlier and get ready as fast as you can to give you 15 minutes of bonus time. Then drop your child off earlier and meet your partner for a quick date, even if it’s just to grab coffee and sit outside while you chat and sip.
• If you live near family: Don’t be afraid to ask aunts and uncles, grandparents, or other extended family to watch your child so you can reconnect with your partner. As a bonus, your family member will get some quality time with your child, which will strengthen their relationship.
• If you belong to a gym: Some gyms provide on-site childcare as one of their perks. You can drop your kids off, do a group class or work out together, then unwind with snacks before it’s time to pick up the kids.
• Look for a parents’ night out: Search for a parents’ night out program in your area so you can drop your kids off for a couple hours. These will typically be run by a children’s museum, a gymnastics spot, your parks and recreation department, or a local church.
• Hire Mister Rogers to babysit: Set your child up with some guilt-free screen time and find a quiet(er) nook of your home to enjoy some time together, just the two of you. (My husband and I have also been known to sneak outside to the porch or backyard!) And don’t be afraid to explain to your child what’s happening and why: When you’re in a relationship with another person, it’s important to have time together, just the two of you. They might as well start learning about healthy relationships now!
• If none of that will work for you: If you’re as tired as I am at the end of the day, you just want to collapse into bed after you tuck your kids in. But if you can manage to stay up 10 to 15 minutes extra after the kids are in bed, you can still connect with your partner in a meaningful way. To help you stay awake, you can plan ahead with a coffee in the late afternoon at least six hours before you plan to hit the hay. If you’re sensitive to caffeine, you could also try an after-dinner family walk around the neighborhood because physical activity can help you stay awake. Another option is to kick off your date with a healthy snack that isn’t too sugary, like apple slices or banana with nut butter, carrots and hummus, or a handful of trail mix. Your body’s digestive process will help keep you awake a little longer.
• If shift work makes dates tricky: Any time you and your partner are physically in the same space at the same time, you can make up any kind of date you want. Try a coffee date, a pint-of-ice-cream date, or a let’s-lie-in-bed-for-10-minutes-because-we’re-both-exhausted date. (All of which you’ll find in the list below!)

Related: 20 Quick + Powerful Ways to Reconnect With Your Spouse Right Now {Printable}

100 Fun Date Night Ideas for Parents to Make You Feel Closer

Below, you’ll find a list of the best date night ideas for parents to bring you and your partner closer together, even when you’re busy and tired. You’ll feel more connected and ready to tackle whatever tantrums, sibling fights, or mealtime battles come your way.

To put together this list, I scoured every article and Reddit post I could get my hands on, talked to friends and family to hear about their favorite dates, and surveyed the more than 100,000 readers in this community—then I compiled all the most-loved ideas into one epic list. And if getting a babysitter isn’t feasible, you should know that this list includes oodles of at-home date night ideas for parents.

You can treat this list as a bucket list and make your way through each date idea, checking each one off as you go. Or you can bookmark this page in your browser and circle back to it any time you need a fresh date night idea.

Pro tip: If you want to make sure date night happens, the absolute best way to do that is to add it to your family calendar. For example, you can make it a recurring monthly entry, such as the first Friday or Saturday of every month. Then when you see it pop up on the calendar for that week, use this list to plan what you’ll do together.

But First, a Warning

If you don’t often get time alone together, your date conversation might turn into figuring out what to make for dinner, reminding each other about appointments you need to make, or talking about the kids the whole time.

And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. If that’s what you want to talk about, then you’re making the most of your time together.

But if you want to foster a meaningful conversation about what’s on your minds and hearts, my go-to favorite is to ask one of these conversation starters for couples during your date. These magic questions for couples are inspired by the latest research on how you can make your relationship last.

No Childcare Required: The Best Date Night Ideas for Parents

Here are all the best at-home date night ideas for parents that don’t require a babysitter.

1. Meet for lunch.

When the chaos of parenting life is dragging you down but adding “schedule a date night” to your to-do list stresses you out, try meeting your partner for a quick lunch date instead. And the best part is when you move your date to the daytime, you can still end the day with your comfy jammies, pistachio ice cream, and Netflix queue.

My husband and I have been meeting up for lunch dates for years, and as our work and home routines have evolved, so have our lunch dates.

For example, we’ve grabbed lunch at a restaurant, met at one person’s office to eat leftovers we brought from home, or had dates in our car while we shared sandwiches. Or when one of us was a stay-at-home parent and the other was working, the working parent would drive home for lunch during the day.

As another option if the weather’s decent, you can find a nearby park with a picnic table. If you have kids in tow, send them off to play while you eat.

• Cost: Free if you eat leftovers; $20-40 depending on the restaurant
• Where: At home or go out

Related: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever {Printable}

2. Sneak off for breakfast.

Wake up a little earlier than the rest of your crew so you can have a few minutes alone when your home is quiet. Here are a few ideas for how to make a breakfast date feel special:

• Work together to make something yummy for yourselves that you don’t usually get to have, like pancakes, bacon and eggs, or a coffee cake fresh from the oven. (My trusted source for the yummiest recipes is Smitten Kitchen.)
• Grab a new kind of coffee from the store and try it together for the first time. If you want to really go all-out, you can get this fun coffee subscription box^† where you can sample new roasts and find a new favorite. Kind of like a wine tasting—but with coffee and delivered straight to your door. If you prefer tea, they also have a tea-of-the-month club that I can personally recommend.
• Make a couple breakfast plates and climb back into bed together for breakfast in bed. If you’re worried about getting crumbs in bed, you can lay a picnic blanket down first.
• Set up a breakfast grazing board with cheese, fruit, and toast with jam.
• Send one person out to pick up breakfast tacos, donuts, or breakfast sandwiches, then bring them home so you can enjoy them together.

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission. All prices shown are from time of publishing.

If you have any goodies left over after your breakfast date, you can share them with your child and make their day, too.

• Cost: Free if you eat at home; $10-20 depending on what goodies you get
• Where: At home

Atlas Coffee Club Subscription Box

With this monthly gift box, you can sample a wide variety of roasts and find a new favorite. Kind of like a wine tasting—but with coffee and delivered straight to your door. If you prefer tea, they also have a tea-of-the-month club.

$50 from Atlas Coffee Club

3. Go head-to-head.

After the kids are in bed, embrace your inner child and bust out a board game or card game to play together. You can go for a lovingly cutthroat vibe or try a cooperative game where you work together.

These are my favorite games to play with my husband, and they’re also popular with the families in this community:

• 7 Wonders Duel: This is the ultimate two-player strategy game. Your goal is to develop your city’s civilization and build the Wonders of the World. The game takes just 30 minutes, and every game delivers a fresh challenge.
• Forbidden Island: In this cooperative game, you work together to collect treasure before the ancient island you’re on sinks into the ocean—plus you have to rescue your whole team off the island with a helicopter before you sink with the island. Even though I know it’s not real, my heart races every time we get to the end of this game!
• Ticket to Ride: In this game, your goal is to figure out the best routes to travel across America by train. This game, paired with a favorite night-time beverage, always relaxes me after a long day of kid-wrangling.
• Azul: This quick brain puzzle of a game with gorgeous art is the perfect choice for a cozy night with a cup of tea or cocoa. You’re a tile-laying artist, and you’re hired to build a mosaic fit to decorate the king’s palace. You score points for the tiles you lay and for using a variety of colors.
• Quiddler: If you enjoy word games but don’t have the mental bandwidth to start a game of Scrabble right before you go to bed, this game is the perfect fit for you. Each card in your hand features a different letter, and the goal of the game is to use those letters to create words. Creating words scores points, and the person with the most points at the end wins. And if you need a shorter game, just play fewer rounds.

For more awesome game ideas, check out our recommendations for the best family board games.

• Cost: Free if you use games you already have; cost varies if you pick up a new game
• Where: At home

$28 from Amazon* $28 from our family shop * Price at time of publishing

7 Wonders Duel

    
“My teenager played this at a friend’s house and came home raving about it, so I surprised him with a copy for his birthday. Now our whole family is HOOKED. The genius of this game is that every time you play it, your strategy has to shift based on the hand you’re dealt. So it never gets boring. It’s a family favorite for us!” – Gabriela

4. Climb back into bed.

On a weekday when you both get home from work, school, or whatever daily commitments took you away from home, climb into your bed and cuddle together for a few minutes.

This quick date works as a sort of reset button to help you unwind from the stresses of the day. And after a few minutes of shared quiet, you may find that it feels easier to open up about what’s on your heart.

Side note: This is one of our go-to strategies for connecting with our kids after school, too.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

5. Start a buddy read.

Pick a book you’re both interested in reading, then take turns reading a chapter to each other every night before bed. Most people love being read aloud to, but unfortunately as adults, we don’t get to experience being on the receiving end of that very often. (And if you’re doubting this, just look at how the audiobook industry is booming!)

If you pick a romance or a book with a romantic subplot, you might even get an extra jolt of inspiration in that department.

But if reading aloud isn’t a good fit for you, you can still pick a book you both want to read, then talk about what you’ve read every night before you go to bed. It’ll be like your own two-person book club!

If you need a recommendation, one of our favorite buddy reads has been The Anthropocene Reviewed because the chapters are short and easy to read, but they still made us think without taxing our (already exhausted) brains.

• Cost: Free if you get the book from the library; $5-30 if you buy a copy to keep
• Where: At home

The Anthropocene Reviewed

“What Green is really telling us with these unexpected stories about Sycamore Trees, Canada Geese, and Dr Pepper is how much there is to love in the world and why that love is worth the effort.” — NPR

$14 from Amazon $17 from Bookshop

6. Pamper yourselves.

Heading to an actual spa for a couples massage and a foot bath may not be practical, but you can create an at-home spa night on your own for much cheaper. All you need is one or two special supplies, such as a bath soak or bath salts, foot masks, face masks, massage oil, and so on.

Then take turns pampering each other. You can give each other a massage (head, foot, or otherwise), prepare the bath for one person and hang out and chat while they relax then swap places, or giggle at how silly you both look wearing a sheet mask.

If you enjoy this date night and want to make it a regular occurrence, you can pick up heated foot spas for two so that you can relax while you enjoy a movie. (A friend of mine got two of these foot spas for her and her husband, and she loves them!)

• Cost: Free if you already have spa supplies; cost varies depending on what you buy
• Where: At home

7. Go around the block.

While your kids are otherwise occupied, head outside with your honey for some fresh air and a walk around the block. All it takes is a few minutes, and you’ll finally be able to have a conversation without getting interrupted 27 million times. Plus, the physical activity will boost your feel-good endorphins and help you handle the stresses of parenting life even better.

For a lovely twist on this parent date idea, turn your walk into a nighttime stroll under the moon and stars. To plan your nighttime strolls for when it will be a full moon, you can automatically add the phases of the moon to your Google Calendar.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

8. Make something yummy.

Work together to make a special treat like muffins, cookies, or cupcakes. Not only will you get to spend quality time together in the kitchen, but you’ll also get to enjoy the delicious manifestation of that time well spent. And as a bonus, you’ll delight your child when you share the finished treats with them. (If you need ideas, my trusted source for the yummiest recipes is Smitten Kitchen.)

If you go the cupcake route, you can add to the fun by getting creative with the frosting. Channel your inner baking competition contestant and see who can decorate the best cupcake.

But if baking isn’t your bag, you can make a special treat like these next-level Rice Krispie treats or whip up a batch of homemade ice cream.

Or if sweets don’t do it for you, you can work together to make a special dinner. After the kids are in bed one night, find a recipe for something you’ve never made before, like homemade pizza, sushi, homemade pasta, a recipe from another culture, or a meal your kids would never eat. Then pick a weekend afternoon when the weather is decent, send your kids outside to play, and dive in together. If you’re making a recipe from another culture, you can play music from that area while you cook to add to the ambiance.

• Cost: Free if you use ingredients you already have; cost varies if you need supplies from the grocery store
• Where: At home

9. Reminisce together.

Make a special snack or drink, then cozy up on the couch together to look through family photo albums or your wedding album, or just flip through the albums on your phones. Seeing cute pictures from when your child was younger, snapshots from family vacations, or weird photos of your elbow you didn’t know were there (thanks, kid!) will naturally bring up a few stories.

As a bonus, if you don’t yet have any physical family photo albums, flag your favorite photos and send them off to Shutterfly to get printed. Your child will love looking through a photo album of family memories, and the photo album makes for a great present for grandparents, too.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

10. Embrace your creative side.

Create something together. Not only will you have fun doing something different together, but creating art has also been shown to impact health by reducing stress and anxiety, increasing positive emotions, and reducing the likelihood of depression.

For example, you can:

• Color in grown-up coloring books (this one’s my personal favorite, and the artist has a whole series of gorgeous coloring books)
• Watch a how-to-draw video and follow along together
• Set up a makeshift photo booth by hanging a sheet and gathering props, then take silly photos of each other
• Braid friendship bracelets for each other
• Build your own mini golf course around your home or yard using items you already have, like plastic cups, cardboard boxes, mason jars, PVC pipe, and so on
• Print out some favorite family photos and make a scrapbook together
• Bust out your kid’s watercolors and paint—even if you can’t draw well (hello, that’s me!), you can create abstract lines and patterns with watercolors that still look lovely
• Find a DIY project or craft that looks fun, grab the supplies, and do it together—like a mosaic photo frame, a tie-die kit, homemade soap, or a clay pottery kit for two like this
• Get one big blank canvas and follow a step-by-step painting tutorial video to create something together—for a ready-made kit that even non-crafty couples rave about, check out the date night kits from Painting to Gogh

If you’d rather head out for your joint creative session, you can sign up for a class at an art or pottery studio.

• Cost: Free if you use supplies you already have; cost varies if you need supplies from the store
• Where: At home or go out

11. Schedule a Do Nothing Day.

Pick a weekday when your child is in childcare or school and take the day off work and other obligations. Forget the errands you’ve been meaning to run, throw your to-do list out the window, and schedule absolutely nothing.

On your Do Nothing Day, you can climb back into bed and read in the peace and quiet, take your time lingering over breakfast with an extra pot of coffee, or bake something yummy. You can pick any other parent date idea from the list, or just go with the flow and see what feels fun in the moment.

Whatever you decide to do, take your time and enjoy being together because this isn’t about marking something off your to-do list.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

12. Stretch your brains together.

Think of something you’re both interested in learning about, like dog training, photography, cocktail mixology, floral arrangement, cooking, calligraphy, and so on. Then make a plan to learn about it together. You can take a virtual class on Skillshare or Masterclass, find an in-person class, or just binge a bunch of YouTube videos.

You’ll keep your brains sharp because research shows that regularly learning something new is one of the best steps you can take to keep your own brain healthy as you age. Plus, the shared experience of learning together will make you feel closer. And you might even discover a new favorite hobby!

• Cost: Free if you use YouTube; cost varies if you find a class to take—Masterclass is $10 a month, and Skillshare has a free 30-day trial
• Where: At home or go out

13. Share your tunes.

Whatever music you’ve been loving lately, play that for your honey. Then swap and listen to what they’ve been enjoying. Share your go-to workout song, the song that lifts you up on a bad day, or one with lyrics you love. For sweet love songs to share without making each other gag, check out our epic list of The All-Time Best Unknown Love Songs: 70+ Underrated Love Songs.

Research shows that listening to music together strengthens your bond and make you feel more connected. Side note: If you don’t yet have an “our song,” it’s not too late! Deciding on one together now can promote intimacy, positive emotions, and shared memories down the line.

To keep the fun going, you can listen to new releases from your favorite artists, check the charts to see what’s most popular (my husband and I always have fun listening and laughing about how out-of-touch we are with what’s popular), or explore brand-new-to-you tunes (we use the Discover Weekly playlist on Spotify).

For a fun variation on this date night, you can think back to all the songs you listened to when you were first dating, then make a playlist of those. Then any time you want to reminisce about the early days of your relationship, you have a ready-made playlist!

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home or anywhere, like if you have a few minutes in the car together

14. Cozy up on the couch.

After the kids are in bed, pop in a movie and host your own movie night for two. To make your movie night extra special, you can plan ahead with some fun snacks (maybe a new flavor of popcorn?) and/or drinks. Then add in a cozy blanket to snuggle up under, and you’re set.

If you need ideas for movies, check out our list of the Top 10 Romantic Comedies You’ll Fall in Love With. Every movie on that list also has my husband’s stamp of approval, including About Time, which became an all-time favorite for us both. (See below for the trailer!)

If the weather’s decent, you can also turn your couples’ movie night into a backyard movie night. All you need is a projector and a white sheet or a screen to project on, plus a blanket to spread in the grass or outdoor chairs. Bonus points if you roast marshmallows over a backyard fire pit. (Friends of ours have this fire pit, and we love sitting around it and chatting!) By the way, this is the outdoor projector I got for my husband one year for Father’s Day, and we use it every week during the summer.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

15. Eat early—or late.

Set your kids up with some guilt-free screen time and plan to eat an early dinner, just you and your partner. To dampen the sounds of kids being kids, you can eat in your bedroom or on your porch. If you have a backyard, you can also turn your dinner date into a picnic. All you need is a big blanket—this is my family’s favorite picnic blanket because nothing soaks through, and it’s easy to clean off.

If eating dinner early isn’t feasible, you can snack during the kids’ dinnertime to tide you over, then plan to enjoy a quiet dinner together after the kids are in bed. If you’re too knackered to cook, order takeout as a special treat and get it delivered. Then for a proper date vibe, turn out all the lights and have dinner by candlelight.

And if neither of those options will work, a fun twist on this parent date idea is to include your kids. Move a small table into a room you don’t usually eat in, like your living room, plus two chairs. Tell the kids you’re having a date night, and pretend you’re showing up to a restaurant. You can get dressed in fancy clothes, and your kids can be the host and wait staff. We’ve done this a handful of times, and our kids love it, plus we get a few moments to finish a conversation for once.

• Cost: Free, unless you opt for takeout
• Where: At home

16. Puzzle it out.

After the kids are in bed, set up a card table in your bedroom or clear out a corner of the floor, then tackle a big jigsaw puzzle together. This is one of our favorite ways to connect because puzzling is calming, plus it’s easy to pair with a nighttime beverage like a cup of tea or glass of wine. And while our hands are busy, the conversation ebbs and flows naturally.

If you don’t already have a puzzle, our favorite puzzle company is Ravensburger because their puzzles are well-made and never have those pieces where you’re not sure if they fit together or not.

• Cost: Free if you already have a puzzle; $10-30 if you need to pick one up
• Where: At home

17. Listen to a podcast.

Find a podcast that’s just for the two of you, and listen together every time there’s a new episode. If your kids are too loud, hole yourself up in your bedroom and tell them you’re folding laundry. Odds are, they’ll skedaddle.

But this is important: Listen to new episodes only when you’re together. If one person jumps ahead without the other, the other person might feel left out, and it will no longer be a shared experience to bring you closer.

If you need ideas for a new podcast, some of our favorite podcasts to listen to as a couple are This American Life, Hidden Brain, and Freakonomics.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home or anywhere, like if you have a few minutes in the car together

18. Count the stars.

After the kids are in bed, head outside to count stars and pick out constellations. You can use a stargazing app to help you, or you can wing it.

If you don’t know any constellations, that’s okay. Embrace your playful side and invent new ones, then explain them to each other.

You can also plan ahead and check to see if there are any upcoming meteor showers, then schedule your stargazing date night around that.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

19. Solve a mystery.

If you and your partner like to watch or read whodunnits, put on your detective caps and solve a mystery together.

I’ve played the Hunt a Killer games and Unsolved Case Files, and they were both lots of fun.

If you find that you love the experience, you might try a mystery game subscription box like from the Mysterious Package Company.

• Cost: $30 for a game; cost varies for subscription boxes
• Where: At home

20. Make a sundae bar.

Pick up your favorite ice cream flavors and candy for toppings, and set up an ice cream bar for two. You can invent your own new combinations, or invent one for your partner that you think they’d like.

One of our favorite ice cream night concoctions is one we borrowed from a local ice cream shop: The Lawless Walrus. Start with chocolate ice cream, mix in Oreos and waffle cone pieces, then top with fudge. Divine!

• Cost: $10-30, depending on how many ice cream flavors or fixings you get
• Where: At home

21. Stroll down memory lane.

Grab a nice sheet of paper for each of you, set a timer for 15 minutes, and jot down as many favorite memories as you can. You can reminisce about moments you’ve shared together, memories of your kid, or even your own childhood memories. Research shows that couples who reminisce together tend to be more satisfied with their relationship and feel warmer and closer to their partner.

Alternatively, you can make a list of specific things you appreciate about the other person.

When the timer goes off, you can swap papers to read what the other person wrote, or you can take turns reading your list aloud to each other.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

22. Browse the shelves.

Visit a locally owned bookstore and browse around together, checking out the staff recommendations and the bestsellers. Alternatively, pick out books you think the other one would like, then sit down and read the jacket copy for all the books and pick your favorite to bring home.

If your kids are in tow, visit the library and bring them along. Take turns staying with the kids while one person goes to pick out a book for the other person. Check out everything, then read the jacket copy to each other when you get home and pick your next read.

• Cost: Free or $20-40 if you pick up two new books
• Where: At the bookstore or library

23. Make a cheese board.

Save yourselves the hassle of cooking dinner and pick up supplies for a fancy cheese board instead.

For Christmas one year, I got my husband The Cheese Board Deck, which has 50 different cards with creative ideas for styling your own cheese boards at home. We’ve been making our way through the deck, one cheese board a month, and we’ve tried so many new cheeses and other fun foods because of it. We’ve even starting doing a cheese board with the kids once in a while, too. (Who knew my kids would love cornichons?)

Side note: If you want to add a wine pairing to your cheese board, the same author of The Cheese Board Deck also has The Wine and Cheese Board Deck.

• Cost: Varies depending on what food you get
• Where: At home

24. Get your (video) game on.

If you already have a video game console, pick a game to play together. This date night idea works best if it’s a game neither of you have played before, especially if one of you isn’t an experienced gamer and one is. Because if one of you has already mastered a game, it won’t be as fun for the other person to get completely dominated or feel lost.

One of my fondest date night memories is when my husband and I got a new game for our gaming console, then spent the night tackling the game together. We felt like kids again!

• Cost: Free, unless you pick up a new game
• Where: At home

25. Host a tasting for two.

Whatever beverage you and your partner like to enjoy together—wine, beer, coffee, tea, or even soda—pick up a few different kinds at the store, then host your own tasting event where you sample a little of everything.

If you want to go all out, you can research cheeses or other foods to pair with each style of beverage. Even if you’re not doing a wine or beer tasting, you can still have fun making up your own pairings. Maybe a sarsaparilla-forward root beer pairs well with Sour Patch Kids?

To make this date night more economical, research ahead of time if any local grocery stores or liquor stores allow you to mix-and-match single beers into your own six-pack, or look for smaller bottles of wine. Most liquor stores will have an assortment of 375 milliliter bottles, which is half the size of a typical wine bottle.

• Cost: Varies but might be in the range of $20-75
• Where: At home

26. Plan your dream trip.

Brainstorm a list of your dream vacations (family or couple), then pick one to plan. Whether you plan it for next year or five years from now, you’ll bond over the shared experience of doing it together.

If you need some ideas to jump-start your brainstorming, here are a few:

• Go skiing or snowboarding in the winter or hiking the rest of the year
• Drive to the nearest beach or lake and go surfing, jet skiing, parasailing, or scuba diving
• Go to an all-inclusive family-friendly resort
• Plan the quintessential Disney trip
• Book a train trip
• Stay at a farm, such as with Farm Stay USA in the U.S.
• Visit a national park—Note: If you have a fourth grader, you can get a free annual pass to all national parks in the U.S.
• Rent an RV
• See the Northern Lights
• Book a cruise
• Plan a safari trip
• Travel to the best spot to catch an upcoming eclipse

As you plan together, you can research hotels, check restaurant menus, figure out a road trip route, “ooh” and “aah” at photos of sightseeing spots, and more.

• Cost: Free (the planning is, at least!)
• Where: At home

27. Get flexible together.

Before the kids wake up or after they’re in bed, queue up a video from Yoga With Adriene and find your flow. Just a few minutes in the morning or at bedtime can help reduce stress and anxiety while improving your flexibility, balance, and posture.

As you experience the delightfully calming influence of Adriene, your breathing and your bodies will get in sync. And if one of you falls out of a tricky pose, the giggles will bring you closer together.

If yoga isn’t your thing, find any interesting new-to-you workout video on YouTube and tackle the new challenge together.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

28. Quiz each other.

If you can’t make it to your neighborhood bar trivia night, host your own at home. Grab your favorite snacks and drinks, then pull up The New York Times Crossword or yesterday’s Jeopardy clues, then take turns quizzing each other. Or for a cooperative vibe, call out the clues and work out the answers together without keeping score.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

29. Camp out in your living room.

After the kids are in bed, set up an air mattress, or drag your own mattress into the living room. Get cozy under the covers together, then watch a movie or just talk in the dark—sleepover style.

To get in the camping spirit, make s’mores together. If you have a fire pit or grill, you can roast marshmallows together outside then come back inside to assemble them. Otherwise, the microwave will work just fine!

• Cost: Free unless you need s’mores fixings
• Where: At home

30. Eat the best.

Browse Goldbelly for your favorite foods and check reviews to see who’s doing it best, then have it delivered straight to your door. For example, you could get the best black-and-white cookie from New York City, world-famous pizza from Chicago, or the tastiest brisket from Texas.

• Cost: Varies but is typically around $50-100
• Where: At home

31. Hunt for treasure.

Set up an indoor scavenger hunt for two. You can reuse your kids’ plastic Easter eggs, tuck a surprise inside each one, then hide them around your home for the other person to find. To make sure this date prep isn’t one-sided, you can split the Easter eggs in half and each hide your batch. No Easter eggs on hand? Just hide the treat itself.

If you’re wondering what to hide for each other, here are a few ideas:

• A piece of chocolate or candy
• A slip of paper where you’ve written something you love about your partner
• A homemade coupon for one free back massage, taking over their chores for the day, or something else your partner would love
• Favorite photos of you together

Pro tip: Take photos of each item you hide so your kids don’t stumble on any stragglers later.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

32. Pick up new moves.

You might not be able to afford the time or expense of dance lessons, so try YouTube dance lessons at home. My husband and I are completely uncoordinated and clumsy, so this date night always results in lots of giggling.

To get started, search YouTube for “xyz dance lessons for beginners,” where “xyz” is whatever style of dance you’re interested in, like swing, salsa, or ballroom dancing.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

33. Host a comedy night.

If you can’t make it to your local comedy club, queue up a comedy special and recreate the experience at home. All you need is yummy snacks and your favorite beverage.

Shared laughter works wonders! Research shows that couples who regularly experience shared laughter feel closer to and more supported by their partners. Dr. Sara Algoe, a researcher at The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, said shared laughter is like a probiotic for your relationship.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

34. Mix up something new.

Find a couple cocktail or mocktail recipes you’d like to try, then pick up all the ingredients you need to make them at home. Turn your kitchen counter into a makeshift bar and chat while you mix drinks. You can even dress up like you would to go to an actual bar, then pretend one of you is the bartender and get flirty.

For recipe ideas, my go-to starting point is always Smitten Kitchen’s drinks section.

• Cost: Varies depending on which ingredients you need
• Where: At home

35. Dream about the future.

Grab a notepad and a pen plus fun snacks, then make your official bucket list as a couple. Think of everything you’ve ever wanted to do “one day,” whether it’s trips you want to take just the two of you, classes to take together, or any other experience you want to share.

If you need ideas, the list of more parent date ideas in the next section is a great starting point.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

36. Start a new show.

Find a television show on Netflix, Hulu, or your favorite streaming service and start it together. This date night idea works especially well if you and your partner tend to watch your own favorite TV shows separately. When you find something you can enjoy together, the shared experience will make you feel even closer, plus it’ll give you excellent fodder for running jokes.

My husband and I still quote shows we watched years ago. (Whenever we have to move a piece of furniture together, we will always and forevermore end up yelling “PIVOT!” at each other.)

As an added bonus, starting a new show together queues up a weekly date opportunity so that you’re connecting on a regular basis.

If you need ideas for what to watch, head to Rotten Tomatoes and check the TV category. But if you like sitcoms, my husband and I devoured Brooklyn Nine Nine, Schitt’s Creek, and New Girl. For action or adventure, the Jack Ryan series (Amazon Prime) got our hearts racing. And for mystery, Only Murders in the Building (Hulu) is a delight!

• Cost: Free if you already have a streaming service
• Where: At home

37. Dip your food.

Dinner is more fun when you dip it in ooey gooey cheese. Get a fondue pot (or use your slow cooker) and make your own cheesy goodness at home. (We got this fondue pot because it doesn’t have harmful PFAS chemicals in the nonstick coating.)

If you don’t have a fondue pot or slow cooker, you can make a big batch of homemade marinara sauce or hummus instead. Then dip anything and everything—bread, vegetables, deli meat, meatballs, chips, pickles, or even large pasta shapes for a mac-and-cheese vibe.

And don’t forget dessert! You can make a classic chocolate fondue or mix it up with salted caramel, butterscotch, peanut butter, or cheesecake sauce. For dessert, you can dip fruit, pound cake, marshmallows, pretzels, nuts, cheesecake bites, mini waffles, brownie bites, or cookies.

• Cost: $50-100 for a fondue pot; cost varies depending on what food you get
• Where: At home

38. Build together.

Pick up a new LEGO set and dive in. Your inner child will be delighted! And if you pick a set that’s fairly involved, this date can keep the fun going over several nights.

If a traditional LEGO set doesn’t float your boat, consider one of the special sets in LEGO’s adult line, like a Pac-Man arcade game replica, a car model like the Ghostbusters car, or Van Gogh’s Starry Night.

• Cost: Varies depending on which LEGO set you choose
• Where: At home

39. Host a taste test.

Visit a gourmet grocery store and pick out a bunch of new-to-you foods to try, then have a night where you taste-test everything. You can go in knowing what you’re trying, or you can set it up as a blind taste test to make sure nobody knows what they’re tasting. And as a bonus, you might even find a new favorite.

For example, one of our go-to date nights is to visit World Market and pick out a bunch of different candy and chocolate bars, then bring them home and gorge ourselves silly. (A lesson we learned the hard way: Steer clear of pre-packaged Turkish Delight candy bars.)

Here are a few more foods you can sample on your taste-test night: different types of pasta, flavors of chips or popcorn, jams and jellies, cookies from a local bakery (get one of each flavor!), salsa, olives (stuffed and marinated), soda flavors, exotic fruit, bread varieties, hot sauce, ice cream, honey, nut butters—the options are endless!

• Cost: Varies depending on what food you get
• Where: At home

40. Play the Newlywed Game.

Even if you’ve been together a while, this can be a hilarious way to see how well you know each other, and you might even learn something new about your partner.

If you’re not familiar with the classic Newlywed Game setup, I included a clip from two celebrities playing it below. Here’s how it works:

1. Get two pads of paper and a bold pen or marker for each of you, or you can use two mini white boards like this.
2. Take turns asking each other questions like, “What’s the best present I’ve ever given you?”
3. Write down your answers separately. (No peeking!) For example, if I were asking my husband this question, he would write down the best present I’ve ever given him, and I would write down what I think is the best present I’ve ever given him.
4. After you’re both done writing, reveal your answers to each other. If your answers match, pat yourselves on the back and move onto the next question. If you want to make the game competitive, you can hand out points. For example, in this situation, I would get a point for guessing my husband’s answer correctly. With that said, I personally think it’s more fun to forget about keeping score and just play!

If your kids are around, you can invite them to watch your homegrown game show. They’ll likely think it’s hilarious, or they’ll get bored and wander off. Either way, you win!

Here’s a list of Newlywed Game questions you can use as a starting point, but feel free to make up your own questions that are custom tailored to you and your partner.

• Cost: Free
• Where: At home

When You Have a Babysitter: 60 More Date Night Ideas for Parents

If you have childcare squared away for your date night, here are a few more parent date ideas to help you reconnect and feel closer:

1. Pack a picnic. Find a nearby park or green space, then grab a big blanket (this is our go-to picnic blanket) and pack a meal to share—cheese and crackers is a classic and easy to prepare. A picnic basket is absolutely not necessary, but if you find that you enjoy picnics together, we gifted this lovely picnic basket to one of our kids, so we’ve borrowed it for picnic dates.
2. Grab coffee. Head to your neighborhood coffee shop, then treat yourselves to a fancy drink you wouldn’t normally splurge on. To get the conversation going, ask one fun question from our special set of Conversation Starters for Couples. As another option, you can bring along a favorite board or card game to play while you enjoy your drinks. Here’s a list of our all-time favorite family board games for all ages, many of which we sell in our family-owned shop here. Among the games we stock, the best portable games for couples that you can easily bring along to a coffee shop are Love Letter, Quiddler, SET, and Welcome To, which is a bit like Tetris but on paper.

$13 from Amazon* * Price at time of publishing

Love Letter

    
“My teen and tween love this quick little card game. To win, you need to rely on your deductive reasoning skills, plus a bit of luck. You can play a whole game in 20 minutes, but if you’re short on time, you can play one round in 5-7 minutes. But warning: Even when we set out to play ‘just one round,’ we always end up playing several!” – Tyler

3. Visit an arcade. Head to a classic video game arcade where you can play pinball, skee-ball, Pac-Man, and more. When you’re done playing, pick out something silly with the tickets you earned, then give it to your child when you get home.
4. Be a tourist. Pretend you’re a tourist in your own town, and plan a special outing to see one of the sights in your area. Often, we can live in a place for a while and not even experience the top sightseeing spots! If you need ideas for where to go, check TripAdvisor for the top-ranked spots in your area.
5. Batch your kindness. You might have heard before that regularly helping others is an important factor in living a long, happy life. So pick a day where you intentionally perform five small acts of kindness together. One study found that people who performed five giving acts all in a single day increased their happiness. You can deliver flowers to a friend, surprise a worker like a barista or wait staff with a really big tip just because, take baked goods to your neighborhood librarians or firefighters, donate old blankets and towels to your local animal shelter, pick up litter at a park, and so on. For more ideas, check out 38 Acts of Kindness for Families—For Every Age And Budget.
6. Ride it out. Plan a bike ride for just the two of you. As a bonus, you’ll get some exercise and fresh air along with your alone time. If you don’t have an area in your neighborhood that’s appropriate for bike rides, research areas nearby that could work by searching Google for “best bike rides in xyz” and replace “xyz” with your city’s name.
7. Sneak out. If the layout of your home allows for this, you can pretend you’re leaving on a date and say goodbye to your child and the babysitter, then when your kiddo’s distracted, sneak back into your room for a date night in bed. Make sure to squirrel away something fun to eat in your room ahead of time. Then you can watch something on your computer or tablet with headphones connected, or just talk with no interruptions. (But whisper if necessary to avoid detection!)
8. Play dress-up. Head to a department store or a shopping area or mall, then browse the clothing sections together. You pick something out for your partner to try on, and they pick out something for you to try on. Make sure to show each other how it looks on for maximum fun. Then if your picks turn out to look horrible, you’ll have fun laughing together. Or if you find something you love, you’ve got your next date night outfit sorted. Win-win!
9. Go out for ice cream. Visit a local ice cream parlor and treat yourselves to whatever looks good. Bonus points if you get a milkshake to share.
10. Watch a movie. It’s a classic for a reason! Head to a movie theater and get the full experience without any kids yelling in the background. For a fun twist on this quintessential date night, go to a drive-in movie theater or try a movie theater that serves food and drinks.
11. Go on a scavenger hunt. My personal favorite style is a photo scavenger hunt because the photos will help you remember the experience later on. When you find something on your list, snap a photo with the item and whomever found it. You can find oodles of free printable scavenger hunts online, so search Google and find one that looks fun for you and your partner.
12. Eat fancy. Make reservations for a special restaurant with fantastic reviews, get dressed up, and enjoy a top-notch meal.
13. Skip straight to dessert. If dinner at a fancy restaurant isn’t doable for your budget, make plans to just grab dessert instead.
14. Pick out gifts. If your child or another loved one has a birthday coming up or if it’s the winter holiday season, head out together to find gifts you can wrap together.
15. Park somewhere. Pick up takeout, then drive somewhere with a scenic view to park so you can eat while you enjoy the view. If you can’t find a scenic outlook, you can park anywhere and then climb in the back of your vehicle to watch a movie on your mobile device while you eat. (Vehicle entertainment systems work great for this too!) Or if you’re low-energy, just head to a Sonic drive-in and enjoy an old-fashioned car date.
16. Sing karaoke. Find a local karaoke bar, and belt your favorite tunes while you cheer each other on.
17. Take a tour. Many cities offer tours for visitors that can be lots of fun for residents, too. From food tours to architecture tours and more, you’ll enjoy seeing your town in a fresh way.
18. Browse the farmer’s market. Take your time visiting all the booths and sampling whatever looks yummy. But don’t forget to bring home goodies for your kids!
19. Throw axes. Visit an axe-throwing field and get your frustrations out.
20. Book a night. This one’s pricey but makes for a fun splurge on special occasions like your anniversary or a birthday.
    • If you can secure childcare for overnight, book a one-night stay at a local hotel or Airbnb and give yourselves a mini-staycation. You can get room service or order pizza, find a movie to watch, visit the hotel restaurant, hit up the pool—or just head to bed earlier than normal and get a great night of sleep for once.
    • If you can’t get an overnight babysitter, one of you can stay behind in the hotel to get a good night’s sleep while the other heads home, then plan to do it again in the near future and swap. But also, there’s no rule that says you have to stay all night in a hotel room! If you get a babysitter early and check in at 3 pm then leave at 11 pm, you’ve still gotten yourselves 8 hours of quality one-on-one time. (Side note: I also recently found out about Dayuse, where you can book a hotel for a couple hours during the day for a much cheaper price.)
    • Bonus: The next morning, return before checkout time with your kids so they can splash around in the hotel pool.
21. Try a food truck. Find a food truck with great reviews and take your partner there to try something new.
22. Listen to an author. Check your local bookstores’ schedules to see if any authors you like are coming into town, then make a plan to go hear them speak.
23. Send your kid elsewhere. Drop your child off with family, or send the babysitter on an outing with your child. They could go to a children’s museum, a park with a playground, the zoo, or anywhere else that your child would enjoy. Then you and your partner will have your home all to yourselves so you can use any of the at-home parent date ideas from this list.
24. Drink flights. Visit a winery, brewery, or bar and get a flight of different styles of wine or beer to sample. Some wineries and breweries also offer tours of the premises, which can add to your fun.
25. Find a trivia night. Local bars and restaurants will sometimes host weekly trivia nights. Show up, sign yourselves up as a team of two, and enjoy pub grub while you test your knowledge.
26. Give time together. Make a plan to volunteer at a local food bank, animal shelter, nursing home, community garden, and so on.
27. Climb rocks. Find a rock climbing wall in your area and challenge yourselves.
28. Recreate your first date. Wherever you had your first date, go back there and relive the moment. If that date spot is in another city, find a similar place in your current city. Bonus points if you try to remember what you wore that first time and wear something similar. And don’t forget to recreate your first kiss, too!
29. Go window shopping. Visit a walkable shopping area and browse to your heart’s content. If you see a coffee shop, pop in for a couple beverages to enjoy while you explore. You don’t even need to buy anything as you browse—just enjoy the stroll and conversation.
30. Try a new restaurant. Check reviews on Yelp or TripAdvisor and find a great restaurant you’ve never been to before, then experience it together.
31. Get a massage. Head to a local spa and splurge on a couples’ massage, facials, or his-and-her pedicures with foot massages.
32. Play putt-putt. Find a miniature golf course in your area and set aside an hour or two to play together.
33. Be artsy. Visit a nearby art museum or gallery and explore. Even if you know nothing about art, the new experience will bring you closer together. Some art museums will even host special events once in a while where you can get free wine and appetizers.
34. Plan a hike. For a parent date idea that will get your blood pumping, make a date to go on a hike. Bring plenty of water and fun snacks to keep you both fueled, or pack fixings for a picnic so you can break halfway to share a meal outdoors. If you don’t know of an area that’s appropriate for hikes, research areas nearby that could work by searching Google for “best hikes in xyz” and replace “xyz” with your city’s name.
35. Go bowling. Reserve time at a bowling alley in your area and see who’s the better bowler. Or if you’re both bad at bowling (hello, that’s us!), have fun laughing at your gutter balls while you eat pub grub.
36. Take a day trip. Find a fun destination that’s within driving distance and head there together to explore.
37. Have dessert in the driveway. At the end of your date night and on your way home, head to a convenience store and pick out your favorite candy or treat. Then when you get home, park in the driveway or parking lot and spend the last few minutes of your date enjoying your goodies and uninterrupted conversation.
38. Strap on skates. Go skating together at a roller skating or ice skating rink. Or if you have rollerblades, you can gear up for a turn around the neighborhood.
39. Catch the sunset or sunrise. Find out when the sunrise or sunset will be in your area, then make plans to watch the event together. Awe is a powerful emotion, and the shared experience of awe will bring you closer. Bonus points: Turn this into a picnic date by packing breakfast or dinner.
40. Cheer on your team. Get tickets to a live sporting event, whether for major league sports, minor league baseball, a nearby college team, or roller derby. For the full experience, junk it up at the concession stands.
41. Swing each other. Find a park with swings that are sturdy enough for grown-ups, then head there during a non-peak time to swing and talk. And if no kids are around, you might even get away with a trip down the slide!
42. Shoot paint. Find a paintball field and suit up. Whether you play on the same team or against each other, you’ll get some exercise and build memories.
43. Visit a nursery. Go to a local nursery or home improvement store and pick out a houseplant you can take care of together.
44. Take a cooking class. The host of a cooking class will usually have everything organized and prepped for you ahead of time, so all you have to do is show up and have fun cooking something new together.
45. Go birdwatching. Head to a green area nearby and see how many different birds you can spot. You can even find a birdwatching app and take photos to submit your finds to the app.
46. Play an outside game. Get some fresh air while you play together. Try frisbee, disc golf, badminton, tennis, or just kick a soccer ball around at a neighborhood park.
47. See a show. Catch a live concert, play or musical, dance performance, comedy show, or other kind of performance.
48. Go swimming. When the weather’s warm, visit a local pool and enjoy cooling off in the water together—without having to worry about reapplying sunscreen on your kids. As an alternative, you can visit a nearby lake or river and rent a canoe, a kayak, or paddle boards.
49. Admire a garden. Enjoy the outdoors at a local nature center, botanical garden, or butterfly garden.
50. Try skydiving. Many big cities and metropolitan areas now have indoor skydiving simulators, in case the idea of actual skydiving strikes fear into your heart. (That’s me!)
51. Escape together. Visit an escape room and have fun solving the puzzles as a team.
52. Dance every week. Find a local dance studio offering weekly lessons and sign up. Together, you can learn ballroom, salsa, swing dancing, or line dancing.
53. Visit an amusement park. Embrace your inner child and visit a theme park or amusement park together.
54. Ride horses. Go horseback riding together, or if you’ve never done it before, get lessons as a couple.
55. Visit a thrift store. Whether you laugh at ridiculous fashion choices from the past or hunt for hidden gems, a local thrift store can make for a fun date spot. For an alternative, try your local flea market.
56. Hit balls. Find some nearby batting cages and take turns hitting balls. Or if baseball isn’t your thing, find a driving range or visit Top Golf.
57. Go geocaching. Never tried it before? That’s okay. Just have fun exploring together.
58. Drive together. Find a go-kart track and race each other.
59. Climb ropes. If you have a zipline or ropes course in your area, this is a fun date that’ll give you a thrill.
60. Fly high. Book a hot air balloon ride. It can be pricey, but you’ll remember it forever!

Get your copy: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Your Turn

What are your favorite date night ideas for parents? Share in a comment below!

The post The Best 100 Date Night Ideas for Parents—Even When You’re Exhausted appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

Every evening, my husband makes dinner while I bounce our youngest on my hip and field the older kids’ requests – the 11-year-old needs me to sign a field trip form, the first grader wants to know how to spell “donuts,” and the preschooler asks for a pre-dinner snack, doesn’t like my answer, and throws an epic tantrum.

In between all that, my husband and I do our best to keep a grown-up conversation going.

He’ll be telling me about something frustrating that happened during his day, but with all the interruptions, I end up saying, “What was that?” approximately 57 times just to understand one story.

Or I’ll be explaining how in the school pickup line, one car looked broken down – then when I drove past it, I looked over and saw the dad in the driver’s seat catching up on some apparently much-needed sleep. But I never get to the punch line because two of the kids decide to have a screaming contest.

So most of the time, we just give up on grown-up conversation until it’s time to sit down to dinner.

But You Know How That Goes…

At dinner, we bring out some special conversation starters so we can reconnect with the kids.

This little set of family conversation starters is our number one favorite trick for getting our whole family talking, thinking, and laughing together.

And all that is awesome, except for one thing.

When dinner is over, my husband and I still haven’t been able to reconnect as a couple and have a grown-up conversation without the kids interrupting.

Then the Parental Marathon Starts

From the moment we all get up from the dinner table and until the kids are in bed, my husband and I are chasing down clean jammies, engaging in power struggles over brushing teeth, nagging the kids to stop splashing water outside the tub, and on and on.

We can’t catch a breath. And that grown-up conversation we first started a couple hours ago? Still a no-go.

But by the time we tuck the kids into bed – and then tuck them in again and again – we collapse on the couch and can’t even remember the conversations we’ve been trying to have all evening.

It’s like after the whole homework-dinner-bedtime routine, our brains don’t work.

The kids used up every last coherent brain cell, and all that’s left of us is two empty shells who are capable of binging Brooklyn Nine Nine on Netflix and not much else.

But Here’s the Big Problem

In our former lives, my husband and I have both been through divorce. We know the consequences of not making time to reconnect as a couple – and we’re fierce in our resolve to keep our relationship strong.

And engaging in daily conversation – real uninterrupted grown-up conversation – is one of the best ways to keep your connection healthy and strong.

That’s because research shows that knowing your partner’s thoughts, life history, and feelings not only deepens your bond but also protects your relationship when stressful events or conflicts come into play. In fact, the number one determining factor in whether couples feel satisfied with their marriage is the quality of the couple’s friendship.

For example, in one study of couples after the birth of their first baby:

• 67 percent of couples experienced a decline in marital satisfaction, while
• The other 33 percent didn’t experience this decline.

But here’s the kicker: half of the couples in the second group experienced an improvement in their marriage – even while coping with the stress of having a newborn to take care of.

The difference? The couples who thrived went into the experience with a deep understanding of each other’s thoughts and feelings.

And that’s not something you can get done one day and check off your list for the rest of your lives. You’re both constantly growing and changing, so you need to stay updated on your partner’s world on a regular basis.

Because the research shows that couples who have engaging conversations every day are better able to handle the stress of parenting life and stay connected.

Related: How to Reconnect With Your Spouse Like Magic…Right Now {Printable}

So…How Can Two Busy Parents Make That Happen?

I knew we couldn’t keep letting our conversations fizzle out. We needed a way to reconnect quickly at the end of the day even when we were both exhausted.

So I went searching for the best conversation starters for couples on Amazon. I ordered two different sets, and when the first one arrived we busted it open that night and asked the first question.

But the first question was about as engaging as watching baby bottles drip-dry. So we skipped to the next question, and the next, and the next.

The questions were either boring, something you might ask in a job interview, or so cheesy I couldn’t bring myself to even read them out loud.

Then the next set from Amazon arrived, and those questions for couples were on par with the first set. I mean, “Describe your pediatrician when you were growing up”? Um, no.

Where were the conversation starters for real couples that would actually bring us closer together and help us reconnect after the daily stress of parenting life?

Which Questions for Couples Actually Work?

Those couple conversation starter duds made me realize I didn’t want just one random person’s idea of what makes for “fun” questions for couples. I wanted a set of conversation starters made up of questions designed specifically to help you reconnect as a couple.

So I set out on a quest to find out which conversation topics for couples will make you feel closer, according to the latest research on happy relationships that stand the test of time.

As I researched, I started keeping a list of questions for couples. Questions proven to strengthen your relationship and bring you closer together, even during busy or stressful times.

And after a few months of research, I had collected the 150 best conversation starters for couples. Not according to me, some random mom. But according to the experts who study successful and happy relationships.

150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make Your Relationship Stronger Than Ever

You can get your set of the best conversation starters for couples here.

My husband and I have been using these questions for couples throughout the last couple years, since our youngest was born. Anytime we sense a disconnect, we’ll grab a question and ask it. Instant connection, every time.

The questions force us to slow down, look each other in the eye, and really listen to each other.

Sure, sometimes we have to kick the kids outside or sneak away to the bedroom for a few minutes just to have a chance of being able to hear each other’s answers.

But that’s a small price to pay for keeping our marriage healthy and strong.

What Makes These Conversation Topics for Couples Different?

These questions for couples are inspired by the latest research on how you can make your relationship last. And not just how you can make it “last” but how you can make your relationship thrive.

Specifically: What can bring you and your partner closer together? What will make your marriage a happy one? And how can you keep the flame burning – or spark it again if it’s gone out?

For example, here are a few tidbits from my research that informed which questions for couples made the final cut:

• Happy couples celebrate the happy moments, no matter how small, even when they’re going through hardships. That’s why you’ll find several questions in this set that will help you reflect on the positive and celebrate that together.
• Happy couples regularly try new things together^†. And so these questions for couples help you identify opportunities for making that happen, whether that means something big like taking ballroom dancing together or something small like trying a new taco food truck you’ve driven by a hundred times.

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

• Happy couples are intimately familiar with each other’s worlds, including childhood memories, major life events, and secret hopes and dreams. Because of that, these couple conversation starters include questions to help you discover your partner’s history and what’s most important to them.

These couple conversation starters give you a practical way to put all the best expert advice on happy marriages to work in your daily life – without having to read a teetering stack of books on relationships. (I did that for you!)

Related: 7 Simple Things That Will Keep the Spark Alive When You’re a Tired Parent

How to Use Your Conversation Starters for Couples

To save you some time, these conversation starters are designed so you can print them on pre-perforated business card templates and just pop each one out (see below). But regular ol’ paper and scissors work just fine too.

1. Get your cards here. After you order, you’ll get a special link to save your cards to your device.
2. Print. I designed them to print on the Avery 8869 business card template. Or you can just print them on regular paper or card stock, then cut the cards out or fold and tear to get a charmingly casual look.
3. Pop the cards into an empty bowl or spare mason jar, put it somewhere visible like your nightstand, and you’re DONE. Or to take it one step further, you can hole-punch them in one corner and put the whole set on a book ring like this. That makes the cards super portable so you can throw them in your purse or your car for a long car ride.

8 Easy Ways to Use These Cards to Reconnect Immediately

In the last year, I asked several friends and extended family to help me beta test these conversation starters for couples and report back.

As it turned out, all those love experts really did know what they were talking about because these questions helped our beta test couples feel more connected and in tune with each other in just a few minutes a day.

But what surprised me is how many different ways people came up with to use these conversation starters for couples! Here are a few situations where you can use them for an emergency dose of couple connection:

1. Make pillow talk. Keep the cards on your nightstand or on your pillow, then ask a new question every night before bedtime. You can take turns asking the same question, or you can each ask a different question.
2. Send a text. Surprise your partner by texting them a question in the middle of the day. One caveat: If you know your partner will be in meetings or unavailable all day, best to skip this approach so you don’t feel like they’re ignoring you!
3. Go old school. Get a nice blank journal like this one that comes in tons of colors and several different paper styles like ruled, dotted, squared, or blank. Then pick one question a day and write the question and your answer down. After you write your answer, leave the journal on the pillow of your spouse to let them know it’s their turn. They can respond to your answer if they’d like, or just write their answer to the question.
4. Set a date. On your next date night, throw the cards in your purse. (Secure them with a binder clip or a rubber band first!) Then when you have a lull in the conversation, break out a question to make sure you don’t end up talking about how your kids are overdue for a checkup and that you need to pick up milk on the way home. By the way, if you struggle with what to do on date night because you’re always exhausted, here are the best date night ideas for parents.
5. Kick the kids out. Once a week, set up a kids’ table outside on your patio or throw a picnic blanket in the yard, then kick them out for dinner so you and your partner can enjoy a quiet(er) dinner inside and ask each other a couple questions from this set.
6. Pair with a game. After the kids are in bed, bust out a fun 2-person board game like Ticket to Ride or Carcassonne. Then when it’s not your turn, ask your partner a question. Because you’re not staring at each other while you trade questions and the person answering is also trying to take their turn, the answers tend to be straight from the heart without any overthinking.
7. Go for a ride. If you and your spouse share a commute, bring the cards along and ask a couple questions to pass the time. If you don’t commute together, bring them along on your next road trip or during weekend errands.
8. Fill a jar. Drop the cards into a mason jar or a bowl, and put it on display in the middle of your kitchen or living room. When you walk by and see the jar, grab a card and ask the question. This one works great for when you’re waiting for the Chromecast or Apple TV to fire up!

Sneak Peek! Here’s a Sample of the Best Conversation Starters for Couples

Here’s a sample of these 150 conversation starters for couples that will bring you closer together and help you reconnect – even when you’re exhausted by the daily grind of parenting life.

Get the full set of questions for couples here.

1. What’s your happiest memory of our time together?
2. If you could have a do-over for anything that happened today, would you? And how would you do it over?
3. What’s one time you felt proud of me? Why?
4. What’s something I do that makes you feel completely loved?
5. When you’re feeling stressed, what helps you relax?
6. What’s your favorite way for us to greet each other at the end of the day?
7. If we could take a day off from all obligations to spend the day together, what’s one thing you’d like to do?
8. When is the last time I did something that surprised you?
9. What’s your favorite thing to do together on a weekend morning?
10. What’s one new activity you’d like to try together?
11. What’s one thing that would make our next date night exciting?
12. When you picture our life in five years, what do you see?
13. What’s your favorite memory of us being intimate? (Yes, the cards include a few saucy questions for couples because that’s an essential part of keeping the flame alive!)
14. If we could jump in the car right now and take a road trip, where would you want to go?
15. What are you looking forward to?
16. What’s the best thing that’s ever happened to you?
17. What’s the last thing that made you laugh?
18. What’s your favorite childhood memory?
19. What was your favorite family tradition growing up?
20. When was the last time I made you feel good about yourself?

References

Full disclosure: I might have gone a little overboard on my research, but I took it seriously because I’ve learned firsthand that you can’t take your marriage for granted and just expect it to survive the stresses of parenting and modern life.

Here are a few of the books I read to ferret out these powerful questions for couples:

• The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert
• For Better: How the Surprising Science of Happy Couples Can Help Your Marriage Succeed
• The Science of Happily Ever After: What Really Matters in the Quest for Enduring Love
• What Makes Love Last? How to Build Trust and Avoid Betrayal
• A Book About Love
• 100 Simple Secrets of Great Relationships: What Scientists Have Learned and How You Can Use It
• Love Illuminated: Exploring Life’s Most Mystifying Subject (with the Help of 50,000 Strangers)
• The Art of Seduction
• The Science of Love
• Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-being
• The Myths of Happiness: What Should Make You Happy, but Doesn’t, What Shouldn’t Make You Happy, but Does
• You Are Not So Smart: Why You Have Too Many Friends on Facebook, Why Your Memory Is Mostly Fiction, and 46 Other Ways You’re Deluding Yourself

Those are the main books I reviewed, plus I scoured a ton of articles, blog posts, and research papers, too.

Get your copy now: The Best Conversation Starters for Couples

Your Turn

Do you have any favorite conversation starters for couples? Share in a comment below!

The post 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

Can you remember the time we took that vacation to a tropical island? We joked and laughed and drank fruity frozen cocktails. I wore a bikini, and we had sex in the middle of the afternoon.

It seems like forever ago. Before my stretch marks and C-section scar. Before I worried all the time about whether our babies were eating enough vegetables and if they would sleep through the night.

I can almost remember the confidence I had. Just yanking off my pool dress. Tossing it on the chair like I never needed it. I cling to that pool dress now. Like my life depends on it, I cling to that dress. Just like I cling to the memories of that vacation. Of how I felt so free and comfortable in my own skin.

My skin feels different now. Almost unrecognizable. Like I’m stuck in someone else’s body. Someone whose body is out of control.

Mood swings. Loose skin. Hot, then cold, no hot. Very, very hot. Stretch marks. Whose body am I wearing? Why are they so hormonal? And where is my fruity cocktail???

I Didn’t Expect This

I thought I would bounce back. I was young! I was supposed to give birth and hit the beach the next month.

I wasn’t supposed to look like this. Or feel like this.

I was supposed to look like I was 24 again. The same girl you dated for years before we got pregnant. The girl who never cared if we left the lights on.

That girl never came back. She took my confidence. She ran with my flat stomach. She took all the good parts of me, and now she’s gone.

Related: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

My Confession to You

I cringe. I cringe sometimes when you try to touch me. When you walk into the bathroom after I shower, I panic.

Don’t look. Don’t see me like this.

I see all those confident moms proud of their “stripes” and of how they look postpartum, but I feel embarrassed. So shy and unsure of myself in the body I was left with.

After two pregnancies. After waking up three times a night for months at a time. Each time, eating a cookie on the way to the nursery because it made me feel better. And I deserved to at least feel a little better if I was missing out on all that sleep.

I was left with a body that won’t fit in any of my designer jeans. Jeans that now crowd the corner of my closet. Jeans I won’t give away because I still have faith in myself.

I still pray the old me comes back. Maybe I’ll wake up one day and see her in the mirror. With her wrinkle-free forehead and perky boobs.

But Then There’s You

Meet the postpartum me. Two times over. This is how I feel.

But you? You tell me otherwise. Day in and day out, you tell me how beautiful I am. How you don’t see the extra 15 pounds. When I eat the entire bag of potato chips, you never judge me. And you never speak a word of my mood swings.

You love me just the same. If not more. You have the confidence in me that I lost. You carefully push me to be the best version of myself. This new version of myself.

And I have to wonder: If you can love her…why can’t I?

That’s where I’m at. Trying to love myself once again. Trying to make this new person the best person. Trying to accept the different parts of me and to appreciate my body for what it has done. It isn’t easy to accept these changes, but I’m trying.

And so I thank you. For loving me. No matter what I look like or how I feel.

Thank you for always thinking I’m the prettiest. The best. The sexiest. Even when I don’t feel like it.

I’m going to work hard on loving myself the way you love me. Because the way you love me is the greatest way of all. That girl with the flat stomach had no idea how lucky she was to have you, but I sure do.

Get your copy now: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Your Turn

What helped you when you were feeling unattractive after having a baby? Share in a comment below.

The post To My Husband, After I’ve Had Babies appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

From the time everyone in my family gets home from work and school and until the kids need to be in bed, we have about two hours to fit all this in:

1. Make dinner
2. Help the oldest with her math homework
3. Stop the teething toddler from eating crayons, books, or batteries he pulled out of the TV remote
4. Eat dinner
5. Clean up food the toddler flung all over the high chair, floor, and behind his left ear
6. Get kids in the bath
7. Try to find clean jammies for all four kids
8. Fail and settle for clean-ish t-shirts
9. Start a load of laundry (see: above)
10. Blow dry any kids’ hair that got washed that night
11. Give the insatiable toddler a snack
12. Change the toddler’s diaper one last time
13. Nag the others to go potty one last time
14. Get everybody one last drink of water
15. Brush four sets of teeth
16. Change the toddler’s diaper one last time (again)
17. Read bedtime stories
18. Lights out

Whew.

So all that typical advice from the experts on how to reconnect with your spouse doesn’t really work.

For example, we don’t exactly have extra time in our nightly routine for “hug your spouse for a full two minutes and let yourself melt into his arms” or “stop and give your full attention to your spouse as he talks about his day.”

Any conversation we do have is interrupted an average of 17.3 times, and so by the time all the interruptions are done, we can’t even remember what we were talking about in the first place.

In this season of parenting life, we’ve made peace with the fact that our prize for getting through each night is being able to collapse onto the couch next to each other with a glass of wine and a new episode of Superstore.

Sometimes we don’t even have the energy for that, and we climb into bed at 8:30, read for a few minutes, then pass out.

Bonus: As a bonus for joining my weekly newsletter, get a free cheat sheet of 60 simple ways to reconnect with your spouse right now using the magic 5:1 ratio.

Which Is Why This Surprised Me So Much

One night a while back, Ty was drying our oldest’s hair while I looked for a pre-bedtime snack for the toddler. One that wouldn’t be super messy and undo the bath they just had.

I called out over the sound of the blow dryer, “You’re so careful and gentle. You should dry my hair next!” I laughed.

He smiled but stayed focused on his task.

A few minutes later, the blow dryer clicked off, and my daughter came out of the bathroom beaming. Her hair dry and shiny.

I walked into the bathroom to get everyone’s toothbrushes, and Ty was still holding the blow dryer.

“You’re next,” he said.

I shook my head. “I was just kidding! You don’t have to dry my hair.”

“C’mon.” He motioned me forward with his free hand.

I laughed and stepped forward. Did we have time for this? Was he really going to dry my hair for me?

“You really don’t have to do this.”

He just smiled and put a hand on my shoulder to turn me around.

An Odd Sensation

Ty moved the brush through my hair slowly, methodically, intentionally.

I stood there, a flurry of questions rushing through my mind:

• Why would he do this for me? How boring to dry someone else’s hair!
• What are the kids doing right now? They’re probably getting all messy again!
• Are we running late? We don’t have time for this!
• Is he really going to do this for me, dry it all the way? I shouldn’t have asked him!

On and on.

But while my mind bounced around, Ty moved the brush through one section of hair at a time, the blow dryer along with it.

Then it happened.

Because I finally realized that this man will stop everything just to do me a simple favor. He hit the pause button on our hectic nightly routine and said yes to making me feel loved.

And he didn’t see it since my back was to him, but my eyes spilled over onto my cheeks.

The Damage Parenting Can Do to Marriage

Nobody wants to become the type of couple that just goes through the motions of your daily routine without stopping to enjoy or appreciate each other.

But when your little ones need so much from you all the time, it’s easy to feel like you’re roommates instead of soulmates.

• Instead of initiating a long hug when your partner walks in the door at the end of the day, you ask, “Did you remember to pick up milk?”
• Instead of trading playful banter while you make dinner together, you both reach the end of your patience trying to help your toddler recover from an epic meltdown.
• Instead of actively listening to what’s weighing on your partner’s mind, you multitask the listening and the laundry…because when else will the laundry get done?

You start to feel disconnected, unheard, or under-appreciated. Maybe all of the above.

And you know you want to fix it, but how?

Because in the chaos of parenting life, you can’t always make time for fancy date nights or afford the grand gestures like a surprise weekend getaway. How are you supposed to reconnect as a couple when extra time and money are nowhere to be found?

Related: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Here’s the Good News (Plus a Big Warning)

You don’t need grand gestures to reconnect with your partner. All you need to reconnect is something that’s so simple and quick even tired parents can make it happen. It starts with the Magic 5:1 Ratio.

Here’s how it works: Research shows that in happy adult relationships, you need a ratio of five positive interactions to every one negative interaction. If you have too few positive interactions to balance out the negative ones, you’ll end up with an unhappy, unhealthy relationship.

For example, feeling like your spouse didn’t hear something important you were trying to say? That’s a negative interaction.

To close the distance in your relationship after something like that happens, make sure to get five positive interactions on the books as fast as possible.

And this is particularly interesting to me as someone who’s been divorced and seen it play out firsthand: Science shows that couples who are unhappy with their relationship – the couples who tend to get divorced – have a positive to negative ratio of 0.8:1. In other words, for every one negative interaction, those couples don’t even have one full positive interaction to balance it out! Yikes.

Thank goodness we now know about the Magic 5:1 Ratio so we can stop that from happening.

Related: Why Every Parent Should Know the Magic 5:1 Ratio – And How to Do It {Printable}

How to Reconnect With Your Spouse – Even When You’re Tired

For the next time you’re feeling disconnected from your partner, here’s a list of a few simple ideas to help you hit the Magic 5:1 Ratio.

Below, you’ll find 20 ideas for how to reconnect with your spouse – even when you’re tired. Because reconnecting with your husband, wife, or partner doesn’t have to be a big ordeal. Most of these ideas you can do immediately in the spur of the moment with no preparation necessary.

Plus, I made you a handy printable with 40 bonus ideas (including a handful of fresh ideas just for the bedroom).

Where do you go from here? A few ideas for you:

• You can send the link to this post to your partner, or print out the post if they prefer to read on paper. Or if you think they may want something a little more “official,” try sharing this post from the research institute that uncovered all this awesomeness.
• Before you leave this post, get the printable below so you can hang it on your fridge to help you remember how to reconnect with your spouse when the chaos of parenting life gets in the way of enjoying and appreciating each other. Or if you prefer to make this a private goal of making your spouse feel special, keep the cheat sheet in your purse or wallet as a reminder to yourself.
• For the best success, treat this as a shared journey with you and your partner to a healthier relationship. If it turns into a blame game of “you’re not following up negative interactions with enough positive interactions,” that will kind of defeat the purpose. This isn’t about keeping score.

Related: Why You’re Hugging All Wrong – And How to Fix It

20 Quick and Powerful Ways to Reconnect With Your Spouse

The list below includes 20 simple things to do with your spouse to reconnect. Aim for five of these positive experiences with your spouse after a tough moment, and you’ll be on the road to making your relationship stronger than ever.

Fair warning: Every single idea on this list may not be a good fit for you and your partner, and that’s okay. But try to keep an open mind because you may find a new favorite thing to do together – and you might even get an open invitation to Dad’s Hair Salon.

For Any Time

1. Give your partner a hug. Make sure it’s a good quality hug of six seconds or more. Here’s why.
2. Say, “Remember when…” then tell a funny or emotional story from earlier in your relationship.
3. Wear perfume or cologne if you don’t usually. If you do usually wear it, try a different scent.
4. Leave a surprise note – a slip of paper in their wallet or purse, a Post-It note on the bathroom mirror, a card on their car seat, and so on. You can tell a joke, write down what you admire about them, or just say “I love you.”
5. Walk up behind them and give them a quick shoulder massage.
6. After you survive a tough parenting moment together, put your hand out to share a high-five with your partner.
7. Queue up “your song” and start dancing. If you don’t have a song yet, try my epic list of the best ever love songs.
8. Ask, “What do you think about…” and then listen to their opinion.
9. When everyone’s home from work and school, set the kids up with a movie, grab your spouse by the hand, and go in the bedroom to lay down and just talk for a few minutes with no one interrupting.
10. Send them a funny e-card.
11. Text them the lyrics to a love song. Here’s a love songs playlist to get you started, including quotes from the lyrics that you can copy and paste.
12. If you can’t afford a date night, ask your spouse out on a lunch date. Actually, do this even if you can afford a regular date night. (For more creative date night ideas that work even when you’re exhausted, here are the best date night ideas for parents.)

When the Kids Are in Bed

1. Feed the kids dinner first (snack if you need to!) then after they’re in bed enjoy a late dinner together by candlelight. (Cheese, crackers, and wine totally count as a well-balanced dinner.)
2. Get this set of fun (but powerful!) conversation starters for couples and ask each other one question every night before bed. If you struggle with what to talk about with your spouse to reconnect, these cards are a must-have!

3. Take turns writing in a journal to each other. You write in the journal, leave it on their pillow, then they write back and leave it on your pillow. You can use any journal or get one specifically designed for this purpose, like this journal just for couples. If you’re not sure what to write, start by writing what you admire about your partner.
4. Play a board game or card game after the kids are in bed. Our favorite 2-player games are Ticket to Ride, Forbidden Island, and 7 Wonders Duel, and we stock them all in our family-owned game shop here.

$20 from Amazon* $20 from our family shop * Price at time of publishing

Forbidden Island

    
“Forbidden Island is great because unlike most games it teaches cooperation instead of competition – all the players must work together, using their different player skills, in order to get all the treasures before the island sinks. Either everyone wins or everyone loses. It is my new favorite game to play with my 9-year-old daughter!” – Mark

5. Watch a funny movie together. Shared laughter works wonders. Check out my list of unsung romantic comedies for ideas. (To go the extra mile, you can put together a movie date night gift basket.)
6. Make cookies or brownies from scratch, just because, and keep them all to yourselves instead of saving some to share with the kids.
7. Write down your bucket list of everything you want to do as a couple.
8. Grab a picnic blanket and wine or hot tea, and head out to your front yard or backyard to stargaze and unwind from the day.

Get Your Free Cheat Sheet: How to Reconnect With Your Partner (With 40 Bonus Ideas!)

After a negative interaction, you feel the distance between you and your spouse, but it’s not always easy to know how to close the gap so you both feel loved and connected. Use this cheat sheet to help you reconnect with your partner after those tough moments. You’ll find these 20 ideas plus 40 more simple ways to reconnect.

1. Get the free cheat sheet. Join my weekly-ish newsletter and as a bonus, you’ll get the printable! Just click here to get it and subscribe.
2. Print. Any paper will do the trick, but card stock^† would be ideal.
3. Tuck your cheat sheet somewhere handy like your purse or wallet. Or if your spouse is in on it, hang it on your fridge. Then when you need an idea for reconnecting, pick a random idea and do it.

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

Here’s a sneak peek of your printable cheat sheet:

Get your copy: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Your Turn

What tried-and-true ideas do you have for how to reconnect with your spouse? Share in a comment below!

The post 20 Quick + Powerful Ways to Reconnect With Your Spouse Right Now appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

Last night, my husband made dinner while I followed behind our one-year-old tornado, trying to minimize the destruction – or at least contain it to the kitchen.

Our baby’s favorite pastime lately is pulling the nice serving platters out of their bottom cabinet and letting them clang to the floor. All other breakable items have been relocated to other cabinets out of reach, but this cabinet is the only one that will fit the huge platters.

We probably should just install a lock on the cabinet, but that would require planning ahead, which I can’t seem to manage now that we’re three kids into this crazy life.

And so every time she started making her way to that cabinet last night, I opened another cabinet to distract her.

“Charlie! Spatulas!”
“Hey, want a frying pan?”
“A whisk! Look, a whisk!”

Then while Ty cooked and I chased, we talked budget. How we can do better, what we can cut out, how to finish paying off the $25,000 hospital bill from when our toddler swallowed a dime in January.

You know, fun stuff. Our voices were tight, our sentences short.

And Then the Tornado Hit

Somewhere along the way, I got caught up in the conversation and lost track of Charlie.

I glanced around. She was near the forbidden cabinet but thankfully just quietly playing with something on the floor. Whew.

“Do you think we should…”

I trailed off because my eyes had finally focused on what she was quietly playing with. And it was coming from her diaper.

I rushed over and grabbed both her hands to keep her from touching anything, but then I didn’t have a way to resolve the root issue of what was spilling out of her diaper.

“Uh, Ty?”

He looked over to where I was frozen, holding our baby’s arms out to each side – and we locked eyes.

The surprise on his face pushed me over the edge, and the fear on mine must have done it for Ty. We laughed.

While Ty ran to grab a bag of wipes, I laughed so hard that Charlie’s hands jiggled up and down, flinging poo everywhere. He went to work wiping up her hands, the mess that had breached the diaper border, and the flinged poo particles.

The whole time, we couldn’t stop giggling. And it was the best thing that happened all night.

Related: 7 Quick Ways to Connect With Your Partner

Don’t Get Me Wrong

I’m not into epic diaper blowouts. But our fit of giggles took a tense situation for any marriage – discussing tight finances – and defused it completely.

After we got Charlie cleaned up and picked the conversation back up again, our tone was playful and light. A world of difference from the first installment of our conversation.

Everyone knows humor can be an antidote to tension, but here’s what you may not know.

Research shows the happiest couples know how to handle conflict in a gentle way, and one of the number one techniques for doing that is with humor.

Related: 75+ of the Best Unknown Love Songs

20 Funny Love Songs for the Days You Need to Reconnect

Next time, I won’t wait for a diaper blowout to jolt us out of a tense conversation. I made this playlist of funny love songs for the days when my husband and I need to hit the pause button and reconnect.

But there’s one thing you should know about these love songs – they’re funny, even silly, but not disgustingly sappy. Because when you need to lighten the mood, gag-worthy love songs won’t do the trick.

Forget “My Heart Will Go On” and “Can You Feel The Love Tonight?” and get this list of funny romantic songs queued up and ready to go for whenever you need to share a smile with your partner.

As with all my playlists, you’ll find snippets of the love songs lyrics below each song title. Enjoy!

Get yours now: The Best Conversation Starters for Couples

And Don’t Forget Special Occasions

This love songs playlist makes the perfect DIY gift for Valentine’s Day, anniversaries, or just because. Just follow my step-by-step tutorial for how to make a modern-day mixtape.

Or if you’re planning a wedding, sprinkle a few of these silly love songs into the playlist for the wedding reception. Incorporating your sense of humor will give your guests a good laugh on the dance floor! I’ve even heard from a few couples who’ve included these songs in their ceremony, walked down the aisle to one of them, or used one as their first dance song.

1. Anyone Else But You by The Moldy Peaches

This silly love song has a line at the end that’ll catch you off guard and have you giggling like a teenager.

Here is the church and here is the steeple
We sure are cute for two ugly people
I don’t see what anyone can see
In anyone else but you

Listen: Apple Music^† | Amazon Music

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

2. The Idea Of Growing Old by The Features

This is one of my all-time favorite love songs. I dare you not to smile!

I can make you angry, you can make me a smile
We can make oragami with the kids for a while
You turn me on to the idea of growing old

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

3. In Spite of Ourselves by Iris DeMent and John Prine

If country is your jam, you’ll love this quirky duet between two people who don’t get along but love each other anyway.

She thinks all my jokes are corny
Convict movies make her horny
She likes ketchup on her scrambled eggs
Swears like a sailor when shaves her legs
She takes a lickin’
And keeps on tickin’
I’m never gonna let her go.

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

4. Sleepy Tigers by Her Space Holiday

Oh, I like you so very much
So much, in fact I gotta wake you up
It’s not that I have words to speak
I just wanna see you looking at me

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

5. The Way I Am by Ingrid Michaelson

I’d buy you Rogaine
When you start losing all your hair
Sew on patches to all you tear
‘Cause I love you more than
I could ever promise

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

6. I’m Not Sorry by Meiko

I hope it won’t scare you away
I wanna have your kids someday
They’d all have dimples on their face like you
And when you’re old or bald or grey
I’m gonna love your wrinkly face
Nobody else could love you like I do

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

7. Sweeter Than This by Katie Herzig

I’ll feed you ramen and you’ll braid my hair
Anything goes when you don’t even care,
When you’re this far in love
If it gets any sweeter than this,
I don’t wanna know

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

8. Sweet Pea by Amos Lee

Sweet pea
What’s all of this about?
Don’t get your way all you do is fuss and pout
You’re the only reason I keep on coming home

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

9. Five Years Time by Noah And the Whale

Oh well in five years time we could be walking round a zoo
With the sun shining down over me and you
And there’ll be love in the bodies of the elephants too
And I’ll put my hands over your eyes, but you’ll peep through

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

10. Home by Edward Sharpe And the Magnetic Zeros

Alabama, Arkansas,
I do love my Ma and Pa
Not the way that I do love you
Well, holy moly me oh my
You’re the apple of my eye
Girl, I’ve never loved one like you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

11. Here is a Heart by Jenny Owen Youngs

Here is a heart
I made it for you so take it
Battered and braised
Grilled and sautéed
Just how you like it

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

12. Mango by Catey Shaw

Oh sweet mango baby
won’t you be mine?
I know you don’t like labels
but let me buy you some wine

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

13. Darlin’ by Dave Barnes

Darlin’ we got it made
Your kids are at your mama’s and baby all the bills are paid
How ’bout a kiss, honey I’ll meet you half way

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

14. Loser by Julian Moon

Full disclosure: One curse word in this one!

There’s a little bit of loser in us
Just two weirdos who fell in love
I guess we’re made from the same weird stuff
Being a loser with you doesn’t suck

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

15. Vintage by High Dive Heart

You’re timeless like an old stack of vinyl
Hundred-year-old bottle of wine-o
Love the classics but what do I know?
You’re the pair of Chucks I never wanna take off
The beat the DJ can’t help but drop
Your Mona Lisa makes my heart stop

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

16. I Don’t Know by Lisa Hannigan

I don’t know if you can dance
If the thought ever occurred to you
If you eat what you’ve been given or you push it around your plate
I’d like to cook for you all the same
I would want to
I am game

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

17. Be Glad I Love You (Go to Bed) by Bug Hunter

You love my quirks, my quirks
The dopey way I flirt
You’re even kind and warm when I am getting on your nerves
You love my quirks, my quirks
I’m certain you deserve
A handsome hunk, but now you’re stuck with this annoying nerd

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

18. Bubble of My Gum by DURRY

You’re the bee to my honeycomb
The bubble of my gum
You’re a Saturday morning
The cocoa on my puffs

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

19. Bad Ideas by Tessa Violet

I hope that you don’t think I’m rude
But I wanna make out with you
And I’m a little awkward, sure
But I could touch my face to yours, oh

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

20. I Like to Be With Me When I’m With You by Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors

If I could be like Albert Einstein
I’d rather just be dumb and be with you
If I could sing like Frank Sinatra
I would rather sit and talk to you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

Get the Spotify Playlist

If you use Spotify, head over to this Funny Love Songs playlist and click the heart button to add it to your own Spotify library. Bonus: As I discover new silly love songs, you’ll get extra songs not yet featured in this post!

Want More?

Check out 75+ of the Best Unknown Love Songs.

Get your copy now: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Your Turn

What are your favorite funny love songs? Share in a comment below!

The post 20 Funny Love Songs Guaranteed to Make You Smile appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

I love romantic comedies, and so does my husband. But we won’t watch any modern romantic movies.

Last year before Valentine’s Day, we embarked on a quest to find the top 10 romantic comedies for the modern woman.

You know, good romantic comedies.

What Makes a Good Modern Rom Com?

We had two criteria for what makes a good modern romantic movie:

1. The main female character must take charge in solving her own problems – that is, not wait around for a man to ride in on his white horse and save the day
2. The main male character must not be a stereotypical chauvinist – for example, his hobbies must extend beyond eating steak and leering after attractive woman

The “chick flicks” we found were sweet, funny, AND worthy of a modern woman who can change the oil in her car or carry on a conversation that consists of more than tabloid celebrity gossip.

And the best part of all? Not only are these movies fun to watch, they’re as effective as weekly marriage counseling at sustaining a healthy marriage.

Whoa.

Related: How to Reconnect With Your Spouse Like Magic, According to Science {Printable}

10 Modern Romantic Movies That Will Make You Smile

This year, we watched a ton of (fairly) recent romantic comedies to put together another roundup* of the best modern romantic movies.

Some were horrible, some were just okay, and some were absolute gems.

For the best ever valentine’s gift or anniversary celebration, stay in with your honey and watch one or two of these for a romantic movie night. Or pin this list and use it for impromptu, cheap date nights throughout the year.

Our favorite in this roundup is the last one in the list. If you watch nothing else from this list, please watch that one!

* We focused on hetero rom coms, so although I know there are some sweet, funny LGBT love stories out there, they aren’t in this particular list.

1. Begin Again^†

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

• What It’s About: Gretta and her boyfriend Dave are college sweethearts and songwriting partners. When Dave lands a record deal, they move to New York. But instead of collaborating on his record, the experience drives them apart and leaves Gretta on her own.
• Why We Loved It: This isn’t your typical romantic comedy, not by a long shot. But it’s a sweet, real story of discovering yourself and what you deserve out of life. Plus, we loved so many songs on the soundtrack that we bought it immediately after watching the movie.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

2. Ghost Town

• What It’s About: Bertram Pincus is a prickly dentist who goes in for a routine medical procedure but dies for a few minutes during the procedure. When he comes back to life, he realizes he can see ghosts. And once the ghosts find out, they won’t leave him alone, demanding that Bertram right the unsettled issues of their lives.
• Why We Loved It: We almost didn’t watch this movie because the main character is kind of a jerk. Actually, there’s no “kind of” about it. He is a jerk. But by the end of the movie, he’s a lovable jerk. We adored this charming little story. This movie also happens to contain the best piece of flossing advice I’ve received in my 37 years of existence.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

3. The Rewrite

• What It’s About: Keith is an Oscar-winning screenwriter whose career (and marriage) have since washed up. He can’t sell a screenplay to save his life, so out of desperation he takes a writer-in-residence position at a university in a tiny Pennsylvania town. His goal is to do as little as possible to teach his class so he can focus on writing his next award-winning screenplay. But then he gets on the wrong side of the Ethics Committee chairperson, and life starts to veer from his plan.
• Why We Loved It: When the movie starts, Hugh Grant is the smarmy guy you love to hate. We adored Marisa Tomei as the foil to his jerkiness. She plays a working student and single mom with two kids, and we couldn’t help but smile when she was onscreen. The whole premise of the movie is a debate on fixed mindset versus growth mindset, and I just ate that up.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

4. (500) Days of Summer

• What It’s About: One day at work, Tom sees Summer, the new administrative assistant – and it’s love at first sight…for Tom. Summer, however, doesn’t believe in all that true love poppycock.
• Why We Loved It: This one makes you think twice about what true love really is. And it has one of my girl crushes, Zooey!
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

5. Ruby Sparks

• What It’s About: Calvin is a young novelist struggling with writer’s block after the tremendous success of his first novel. As a writing exercise, he creates the character of Ruby – the perfect girlfriend. Then one day he walks into his kitchen and finds Ruby, in the flesh.
• Why We Loved It: What a weird little film. But so good! And funny too.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

6. Celeste and Jesse Forever

• What It’s About: Celeste and Jesse were high school sweethearts who got married young. Now that they’re in their 30s, they’ve drifted apart and are on the brink of divorce. But they’re still best friends, and they spend every day and night together. How can they move on when they’re still together all the time?
• Why We Loved It: We were reluctant to watch this one for a while because it’s about divorce. Been there, done that, and we don’t need a “romantic comedy” that’s a downer. But this movie was refreshingly real while still making us laugh. I’m happy we finally watched it!
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

7. Adam

• What It’s About: Adam is a man living with Asperger’s syndrome. His father just died, and he’s trying to find his way in the world without his father by his side every day. When Beth moves into the upstairs apartment in Adam’s building, Adam wants to get to know her but doesn’t know how to make it happen. With the urging of a long-time friend, Adam finally jumps off the deep end into romance.
• Why We Loved It: This tender love story is stripped of the usual drama because Adam says exactly what he means, and Beth learns she has to as well if they’re going to communicate at all. Their story will make you think about what love means to different people.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

8. Music and Lyrics

• What It’s About: Alex Fletcher is a washed-up musician from a 1980s pop band who gets a second chance at fame when a modern pop diva asks him to write a song for her new album. The only problem? He can’t write lyrics. When Sophie shows up to fill in for his usual plant-keeper, she overhears a lyrics brainstorming session and sings the perfect lyrics to herself while she waters Alex’s plants. Alex has a genius lyricist in his midst, but unfortunately for him she’s been burned by the creative process and wants nothing to do with his songwriting venture.
• Why We Loved It: This one’s more along the lines of typical modern romantic movies than the other films in this list, but that’s not a bad thing. This movie almost didn’t make the list because we already had the more recent Hugh Grant film, The Rewrite, but the banter between Hugh Grant and Drew Barrymore is just plain fun to watch. This movie is light and playful, making it a great romantic comedy.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

9. Safety Not Guaranteed

• What It’s About: Three jaded magazine journalists encounter a bizarre classified ad: “Wanted: Someone to go back in time with me. This is not a joke. You’ll get paid after we get back. Must bring your own weapons. Safety not guaranteed. I have only done this once before.” They decide to answer the ad to find out the real story. But when they meet Kenneth, the man who placed the ad, their hunt takes an unexpected turn.
• Why We Loved It: We actually wanted to put this one in last year’s list! But with About Time being our favorite last year, we figured two time-travel romantic comedies was a bit much for one list. We’re not usually into sci-fi, but this movie is about so much more than time travel. We weren’t expecting to like it, and its quirky charm completely caught us off guard.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

10. What If

• What It’s About: Wallace’s life is a mess. He broke up with his girlfriend and dropped out of medical school. Just when he decides to put his love life on hold, he meets Chantry. The two have an instant spark, but unfortunately for Wallace, Chantry already has a boyfriend.
• Why We Loved It: Wallace and Chantry are just adorable together. I could watch those two all day! This is a sweet, funny love story I will definitely be watching again.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

Want More?

For more easy ways to keep the romance alive, check out 7 Quick Ways to Connect With Your Partner.

Download now: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Your Turn

What are your favorite modern romantic movies? Share your picks in a comment below!

The post 10 Best Modern Romantic Movies That Will Make You Smile appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

I am not what you would call a “hugger.” Sure, I hug my close friends and family.

But acquaintances and co-workers? Those hugs feel forced and awkward, and it’s like my body has forgotten how to execute on a hug. Which side do I tilt my head to? Do I use both arms? What if I use only one arm, but it’s the same side arm they use, and our arms meet in the middle in a clumsy hug-and-high-five hybrid?

Don’t even get me started on the boob issue.

Clearly, I am in need of some coaching in the casual hugging department.

But recently, I learned that it’s not just the casual hugs I’m struggling with.

The way I’m hugging my husband and kids is all wrong.

Here’s Why

According to The Happiness Project^†, you need to hold a hug for at least six seconds to get the happy chemicals oxytocin and serotonin flowing.

Why is that important? Those are the chemicals that boost your mood and promote bonding.

After I learned this, I paid attention to the hugs I gave my husband and kids for a couple days. I counted to myself while we hugged.

Three seconds here, half a second there.

Our hugs—if we remembered to exchange them—were rushed.

After a couple days of those quick, bland hugs, I decided to do my own experiment.

When my husband got home from work, I walked up to him and opened my arms for a hug.

Then instead of letting go after a couple seconds, I just kept hugging.

And the funniest thing happened.

After six seconds, my body felt warmer.

Eight seconds, and my body relaxed into his.

Ten seconds, I let go of a deep breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding.

After our crazy busy day filled with work drama and toddler temper tantrums, we just…connected.

Everything else melted away.

That hug recharged me so I could face whatever came my way—from picky eating at dinner to epic bedtime stalling.

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

Related: 21 Sweet and Silly Ways to Hug Your Child So They Feel Absolutely Loved {Printable}

A Hugging Challenge for You

After you read this, promise yourself you’ll try a 6-second hug. Say it out loud to yourself, or write it down to make the commitment official.

Then the next time you see your partner, try it out.

After six seconds, I bet you’ll be hooked.

When the day-to-day routine starts to get the better of you, a 6-second hug is the perfect way to connect with your husband or wife.

Your marriage needs it.

Want More?

Find more scientifically proven tricks to stay connected as a couple, check out:

• How to Connect With Your Partner: 7 Sweet + Simple Tricks for When You’re Busy or Tired
• How to Reconnect With Your Spouse Like Magic, According to Science

Your Turn

How do you stay connected when real life gets in the way? Share your tip in a comment below!

The post Why You’re Hugging All Wrong – And How to Fix It appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

You probably know someone who rants about it being a Hallmark holiday designed to manipulate people into spending money on cheesy cards and cliched Valentine’s gifts like flowers and chocolates. Or maybe you rant about it yourself.

That used to be me.

And then I fell in love.

Now my husband and I spend our free time researching the all-time best unknown love songs. We try to take advantage of every opportunity to stay connected as a couple—no matter how small.

And for Valentine’s Day last year?

We watched oodles and oodles of chick flicks to find the top 10 romantic comedies for the modern woman.

I’m officially a Valentine’s Day convert.

But Here’s the Problem

For Valentine’s Day, the status quo celebration is to get a babysitter and go out to a nice dinner.

But babysitters are expensive. If you did manage to think ahead to make reservations for a fancy restaurant, you and your honey will show up on the big night along with every other couple who had the same idea.

So at your romantic, cozy dinner for just the two of you, without kids screaming or asking for food or drawing on the walls? You’ll barely be able to hear each other.

You’ll resort to half-yelling across the table to be heard, get frustrated when you catch only every other word from your partner, and end up rushing through your meal just to get outside and away from the din of the restaurant.

And since you told the babysitter you’d be home by 11 pm and it’s only 9:30—you’ll probably end your hot date night at the grocery store to get diapers and peanut butter because…what else is there to do?

This Is a Way Better Valentine’s Gift

Tell your honey you’ve got Valentine’s Day covered.

Then put together this easy peasy DIY date night gift basket. You can do it last minute, and you can do it cheap. And I promise it’ll be way more romantic than yelling at each other in a crowded restaurant.

This DIY gift basket has everything you need for a cozy Valentine’s Day movie night.

After the kids go to bed on February 14, just present your love with this gift basket—containing all the essentials for a special movie night on the couch.

Related: The Best 100 Date Night Ideas for Parents—Even When You’re Exhausted

How to Make Your DIY Date Night Gift Basket

This date night gift basket also makes a great anniversary gift, plus it’s a fun date night idea for any time of year.

1. Check your closets or the attic for a basket. Or you could even use a cardboard box and wrap it in festive wrapping paper like this heart wrapping paper^†. If you want to go all out, this picnic basket is pretty adorable, and you’ll be able to use it throughout the year for impromptu date nights or family picnics.

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

2. Fill the basket with your favorite movie night treats:
   • Popcorn—This Vermont maple and sea salt popcorn would be a fun treat. (We’ve had some of their other flavors but haven’t tried this one yet, so let me know if you do!)
   • Soda or wine—I love the Hansen’s soda brand because it’s made with real sugar, and if I’m going to have soda, I want to have soda. Their Cherry Vanilla Creme Soda would be perfect for Valentine’s Day.
   • Candy—Anything from fancy Ghirardelli chocolate hearts to Smoochi Lips.
3. Get a DVD or Blu-Ray of a top-notch romantic comedy. Or if you want to rent one instead, print the photo from Amazon to put in the box. My all-time favorite romantic comedy is About Time (and it’s my husband’s favorite too). But if you want more ideas, check out the Top 10 Romantic Comedies for the Modern Woman.
4. Find a cozy blanket to throw in the basket too.

That’s it!

Easiest Valentine’s gift ever.

Your Turn

What’s the best Valentine’s gift you’ve ever received? Share your story in a comment below!

The post How to Make the Perfect Date Night Gift Basket: 4 Easy Steps appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

When my husband and I first started dating, we bonded over music.

But not just any music. Specifically, we had a bit of an obsession with love songs.

To be clear, I’m not talking about Celine Dion and Mariah Carey. Nothing like the cheesy stuff you’d find on a list of the greatest love songs of all time.

What we couldn’t get enough of were unknown love songs.

As an ongoing love letter to each other, we started a love songs playlist. Years later, we’re still adding to it.

Lately, we’ve been on the hunt for romantic holiday songs to get our playlist in the Christmas spirit.

12 Winter Love Songs for Your Holiday Playlist

Here are the best unknown love songs we found for your holiday playlist. Some mention Christmas, but we focused on finding songs that conjure up cozy winter images—perfect for playing in the background while you snuggle by the fire with your honey.

Side note: This playlist makes the perfect heartfelt homemade holiday gift for your spouse or partner.

Just buy a few of the holiday love songs listed below (maybe mix in some of The 12 Best Christmas Songs You’ve Never Heard), and follow my instructions on how to share a playlist. Then wrap your playlist in something festive, and you’re done!

Get Your Copy: The Best Conversation Starters for Couples

1. Snowfall^† by Ingrid Michaelson

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

“I want a snowfall kind of love
The kind of love that keeps you in bed all day
Oh I want to walk through with you
And watch it all melt away”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

2. More Than I Asked For by Joy Williams

“You and me
Underneath the evergreen,
Rosy cheeks,
Holding hands while the snow is falling”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

3. 30 Days by Never Shout Never

“I’m making a list, hell, I’ll check it twice
Of all the things you’ve done in my life
Then I’ll send it your way
So you see why I love you”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

4. Winter Moon by Mindy Gledhill

“On the A.M. radio, they’re playing Christmas songs
So horrendously off key, you loudly sing along
Cider simmers on the stove,
Reading Dickens by the glow
Of the light that lingers through the window”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

5. The Idea of Growing Old by The Features

“You in your kerchief and me in my cap
We can settle down for an afternoon nap
You turn me on to the idea of growing old”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

6. All My Bells Are Ringing by Lenka

“So take my heart
This Christmas
And wrap it
In a ribbon
And a bow”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

7. Blood Bank by Bon Iver

“That secret that we know that we don’t know how to tell
I’m in love with your honor, I’m in love with your cheeks
What’s that noise up the stairs, babe?
Is that Christmas morning creaks?”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

8. Mushaboom by Feist

“Old dirt road
Knee deep snow
Watching the fire as we grow old”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

9. It Really Is (A Wonderful Life) by Mindy Smith

“I’d never noticed that the crackle of a fire
Makes music when accompanied by kiss
And when did I start having dreams about pumpkin pies
There’s not a lot that’s sweeter than this”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

10. All That I Want by The Weepies

“Above the rooftops
The full moon dips its golden spoon
I wait on clip-clops, deer might fly
Why not? I met you”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

11. Cold December Night by Michael Bublé

“The twinkling of the lights
The scent of candles fill the household
Old Saint Nick has taken flight
With a heart on board so please be careful”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

12. It Snowed by Meaghan Smith

“It snowed last night
Everything is sparkling with diamond light
The road is bare
It’s four feet high
Honey let’s play hooky
Cause it snowed last night”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

Get your copy now: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Want More?

Check out 75+ of the Best Unknown Love Songs.

Your Turn

What are your favorite winter love songs? Leave a comment to share your picks!

The post 12 Best Winter Love Songs That Will Keep You Warm and Cozy appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

A lot of the most popular “love” songs are actually about broken hearts. And when you want to share love song quotes with your partner in a sweet, off-the-cuff text in the middle of the day, Sam Smith isn’t exactly the right vibe. (I mean…”And deep down I know this never works, but you can lay with me so it doesn’t hurt”?)

Which is why my husband and I started an epic love songs playlist as an ongoing love letter to each other—filled with modern, happy songs about love.

Real love—not heartbreak or betrayal or stalking. And nothing disgustingly sappy, either.

You probably won’t hear these gems on the radio, but they’ve got the best love song quotes for sharing with your partner.

The Most Beautiful Love Song Quotes That Will Make Your Partner Swoon

Here are a few of the most beautiful love song quotes from our love songs playlist.

They explain so beautifully what it’s like to be in love, and they’re perfect for writing in an anniversary card, sending via an impromptu text, or jotting down for a surprise note to leave under your loved one’s pillow.

1. The Idea of Growing Old^† by The Features

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

We can talk all night, we can talk all day,
We can play charades when there is nothing to say.
You turn me on to the idea of growing old.

Listen: iTunes | Amazon MP3

2. Sweeter Than This by Katie Herzig

I’ll feed you ramen and you’ll braid my hair
Anything goes when you don’t even care
When you’re this far in love

Listen: iTunes | Amazon MP3

3. Sleepy Tigers by Her Space Holiday

We’re gonna jump in bed and be all alone
You’ll make biscuits and I’ll make tea
We’ll curl up close and then fall asleep
To the sound of no one else, no one else around

Listen: iTunes | Amazon MP3

4. You and I by Ingrid Michaelson

We might not have any money
But we’ve got our love to pay the bills

Listen: iTunes | Amazon MP3

5. You Make Me Happy by Lindsey Ray

It’s the heart on your sleeve never making me wonder
It’s the bond that we tie up and over and under
You’re the sun and the rain and my grass is always green

Listen: iTunes | Amazon MP3

6. Riptide by Vance Joy

I love you when you’re singing that song and
I got a lump in my throat ’cause
You’re gonna sing the words wrong

Listen: iTunes | Amazon MP3

7. I’m Not Sorry by Meiko

I wanna have your kids someday
They’d all have dimples on their face like you
And when you’re old or bald or grey
I’m gonna love your wrinkly face
Nobody else could love you like I do

Listen: iTunes | Amazon MP3

8. Overwhelmed by Tim McMorris

I could sing a thousand songs about you, still that would not do
There’s a million tiny things that make the things that you do, you
I wouldn’t trade our time together, wouldn’t trade for anything
‘Cause nothing else here in the world can bring the happiness you bring

Listen: iTunes | Amazon MP3

9. Love Is What You Are by Old 97’s

Love is what you are
Not what you do
I know what you are
And I love you

Listen: iTunes | Amazon MP3

10. All I Want Is You by Barry Louis Polisar

If you were a wink, I’d be a nod
If you were a seed, well I’d be a pod
If you were the floor, I’d wanna be the rug
And if you were a kiss, I know I’d be a hug

All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea

Listen: iTunes | Amazon MP3

Want More?

Check out 75+ of the Best Unknown Love Songs.

Your Turn

What are your favorite love song quotes? Share in a comment below!

The post The Most Beautiful Love Song Quotes That Will Make Your Partner Swoon appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

My husband and I have been writing an ongoing love letter to each other since we started dating, in the form of a love songs playlist. But not just any love song will do.

Our playlist is a collection of hidden gems—the best unknown love songs in the world.

You won’t find Celine Dion in this list. Mariah Carey either.

What you will find is a treasure trove of fresh, romantic tunes that will put a smile on your face.

The Best Unknown Love Songs for Any Occasion

From date nights to Valentine’s Day, weddings to anniversaries, and every day in between—play these underrated love songs for your honey, and you’ll get major brownie points.

For each song below, you’ll find a snippet from the lyrics as well as the official video if available. Use this list to build a Valentine’s Day playlist of the most romantic songs your sweetheart has never heard, and bring on the heart-eyes!

I’m always on the lookout for new songs for our playlist. If you know of a unique love song that’s not on this list, please leave a comment below to share.

Get yours now: The Best Conversation Starters for Couples

1. 5 Years Time by Noah & The Whale

Oh well, in five years time we could be walking ’round a zoo
With the sun shining down over me and you
And there’ll be love in the bodies of the elephants too
And I’ll put my hands over your eyes, but you’ll peep through

Listen: Apple Music^† | Amazon Music

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

2. All ‘Cause of You by The 88

I’ve been sinking through the drain of love,
Lift my eyes to skies of up above,
Listen to me this is how I feel,
Since I knew you all my thoughts are real,
You’re the only one i wanna do,
Everything’s new,
And it’s all ’cause of you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

3. Lost in the Moment by Daniel Lee Kendall

You were wearin’ that pretty white dress
You wore it with your pretty smile
I was trying to do my best
To see you smile your pretty smile at me

Listen: Apple Music

4. Just a Boy by Angus & Julia Stone

One kiss from you, and I’m drunk up on your potion
That big old smile is all you wore
Girl you make me want to feel
Things I’ve never felt before

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

5. Wonderin by Nicole Reynolds

My heart is made of instruments
That strum this song for you
They bend and twist each simple pitch
In hopes you’ll feel it too

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

6. Tighten Up by The Black Keys

I don’t need to get steady
I know just how I feel
I’m telling you to be ready
My dear

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

7. The Girl by City and Colour

While I’m off chasing my own dreams
Sailing around the world
Please know that I’m yours to keep
My beautiful girl

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

8. When We First Met by Hellogoodbye

As I kept track of every haircut that we ever had
I could, I could see how long it had been, oh
Oh, how long it had been
And this thought, made it clearer
I ought to be near her

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

9. Sleepy Tigers by Her Space Holiday

Oh I like you so very much so much in fact I gotta wake you up
It’s not that I have words to speak
I just wanna see you looking at me

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

10. You’re What I’m Looking For by Rooney

When I look at you, my troubles all go away
I’m someone new, it feels just like a new day
When you hold me tight, I get lost in your arms
I know tonight I’ve finally found what I’m looking for

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

11. OK by Holly Conlan

And now I’m confused on top of it all
I was ready to lose, and ready to fall
And something about the way that you look at me
Makes it feel okay

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

12. Gray or Blue by Jaymay

But your sweatshirt says it all
With the hood over your face
I can’t keep starin’ at your mouth
Without wonderin’ how it tastes

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

13. Be My Thrill by The Weepies

Be my youth
My kissing booth
My little sweet tooth
My beauty and truth

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

14. Sweeter Than This by Katie Herzig

I’ll feed you Ramen and you’ll braid my hair
Anything goes when you don’t even care
When you’re this far in love

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

15. The Lucky Ones by Tim Myers

Lately I’ve been smiling outside
I feel good, I feel light as a feather
Open up the window look out at the sky
Everything’s better
Ah, ah, ah
Ah, ah, ah
We’re the lucky ones

Listen: Apple Music

16. Fine By Me by Andy Grammer

I’m just saying it’s fine by me
If you never leave
And we can live like this forever
It’s fine by me

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

17. I Never by Rilo Kiley

So let’s take a loan out, put it down on a house
In a place we’ve never lived
In a place that exists in the pages of scripts
And the songs that they sing
And all of the beautiful things
That make you weep, but don’t have to make you weak

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

18. Oh, It Is Love by Hellogoodbye

Oh say, wouldn’t you like to be older and married with me?
Oh say, wouldn’t it be nice to know right now that we’ll be

Someday holding hands in the end
All our broken plans will have been
I will kiss you soft so you know

It is love from the first
Time I pressed my lips against yours
Thinking, “Oh, is it love?”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

19. All Smiles by Jess Penner

Hands full of lemon drops all disappear
All lips like children, the voices we hear
They’re all smiles, they’re all smiles, they’re all smiles

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

20. Rhythm of Love by Plain White T’s

My heart beats like a drum
A guitar string to the strum
A beautiful song to be sung
She’s got blue eyes deep like the sea
That roll back when she’s laughing at me
She rises up like the tide
The moment her lips meet mine

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

21. Reasons to Love You by Meiko

I wanna fall asleep with you tonight
Wanna know that I am safe when you hold me tight
Wanna feel how I wanna feel, forever

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

22. Here is a Heart by Jenny Owen Youngs

Here is a heart
I made it for you so take it
Battered and braised
Grilled and sautéed
Just how you like it

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

23. Parentheses by The Blow

And when you’re holding me
We make a pair of parentheses
There’s plenty space to encase
Whatever weird way my mind goes
I know I’ll be safe in these arms

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

24. You Are the Best Thing by Ray LaMontagne

And baby, the way you move me it’s crazy
It’s like you see right through me
And make it easier
You please me you don’t even have to try

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

25. Life Less Ordinary by Carbon Leaf

The night you came into my life
Well it took the bones of me, took the bones of me
You blew away my storm and strife
And shook the bones of me, shook the bones of me

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

26. Toothpaste Kisses by The Maccabees

Lay with me, I’ll lay with you
We’ll do the things that lovers do
Put the stars in our eyes
And with heart-shaped bruises
And late night kisses
Divine

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

27. You Make Me Happy by Lindsey Ray

It’s the heart on your sleeve never making me wonder
It’s the bond that we tie up and over and under
You’re the sun and the rain and my grass is always green
With a kiss on my cheek, always letting me know
I’m the birds and the bees, I’m the apple in your eye
I know that you know that I know you’re all I need

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

28. Question by Old 97’s

She’d had no idea, she started to cry
She said in a good way
He took her by the hand, walked her back home
They took the long way

Some day somebody’s gonna ask you
A question that you should say yes to
Once in your life
Maybe tonight I’ve got a question for you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

29. Everyday by Vetiver

I say it all the time
You don’t pay no mind
When I tell you that I love you
Now do ya?
I wanna be clear
All I wanna hear is your voice
Have your face to see
How happy that would make me

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

30. The Idea of Growing Old by The Features

We can talk all night, we can talk all day
We can play charades when there is nothing to say
You turn me on to the idea of growing old

I can make you angry, you can make me a smile
We can make origami with the kids for a while
You turn me on to the idea of growing old

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

31. Home by Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros

Hot and heavy, pumpkin pie
Chocolate candy, Jesus Christ
Ain’t nothing please me more than you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

32. What I Wouldn’t Do by A Fine Frenzy

If we were children I would bake you a mud pie
Warm and brown beneath the sun
Never learned to climb a tree but I would try
Just to show you what I’d done

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

33. Sweet Pea by Amos Lee

Sweet pea
What’s all of this about?
Don’t get your way all you do is fuss and pout
You’re the only reason I keep on coming home

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

34. Blue Eyes by Cary Brothers

All the lights on and you are alive
But you can’t point the way to your heart
So sublime, when the stars are aligned
But you don’t know
You don’t know the greatness you are

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

35. Anyone Else But You by The Moldy Peaches

Here is the church and here is the steeple
We sure are cute for two ugly people
I don’t see what anyone can see
In anyone else but you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

36. In Spite of Ourselves by Iris DeMent and John Prine

She thinks all my jokes are corny
Convict movies make her horny
She likes ketchup on her scrambled eggs
Swears like a sailor when shaves her legs
She takes a lickin’
And keeps on tickin’
I’m never gonna let her go.

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

37. Little Romance by Ingrid Michaelson

I see you’ve pressed those pants
I see you’ve styled that hair
There doesn’t seems to be much of it there
You’re in the mood to dance
Can I have this chance
To be your little romance?

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

38. I’m Not Sorry by Meiko

I hope it won’t scare you away
I wanna have your kids someday
They’d all have dimples on their face like you
And when you’re old or bald or grey
I’m gonna love your wrinkly face
Nobody else could love you like I do

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

39. All I Want Is You by Barry Louis Polisar

If you were a wink, I’d be a nod
If you were a seed, well I’d be a pod
If you were the floor, I’d wanna be the rug
And if you were a kiss, I know I’d be a hug

All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

40. Love Love Love (Let You Go) by Andy Grammer

No defenses I’m too deep for common sense
Well it’s love, love, love, love, love
Oh my I’m so delighted; I don’t try to even fight it
I think you should know that I will never let you go

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

41. The Little Things by Carlos Bertonatti

Run, run, run
Underneath my pillow case
And come, come, come
Closer to me, yeah
If life has taught me anything
It?’s all about the little things

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

42. Overwhelmed by Tim McMorris

I could sing a thousand songs about you, still that would not do
There’s a million tiny things that make the things that you do, you
I wouldn’t trade our time together, wouldn’t trade for anything
‘Cause nothing else here in the world can bring the happiness you bring

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

43. Stuck on You by Meiko

‘Cause you are the one I could see having fun with
Not just for the night, but for the rest of my life
You are the one I could never be done with
I want you tonight and for the rest of my life

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

44. Thank You by Mozella

You fight off my enemies
You’d take a bullet for me
And you know I’d do the same for you
‘Cause that’s how we roll
Connected at the soul

Listen: Apple Music

45. All of You by Busby Marou

So if you choose always me
I’ll make a promise to choose all of you
And if you will follow me now
I’ll be always there to follow you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

46. Better Than Love by Griffin House

So when I’m walking down the road and feeling bad
Can’t understand the things you do
Nothing turns out the way we planned
You’re still my baby, and I’m still your man

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

47. Love by Matt White

And I, I, I, I, I…I can feel it in your kiss
It just gives me tender bliss
What is love, what is love?
I just want it to be love

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

48. Lucky by Kat Edmonson

Happiness
Feels like this
Your heart upon your sleeve
There’s a place
In time and space
Where we can all be free

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

49. 3 Rounds and a Sound by Blind Pilot

They’re playing our song
They’re playing our song
Can you see the lights?
Can you hear the hum
Of our song?

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

50. Brand New Day by Lindsey Ray With Tim Myers

Wake up
Open your sleepy eyes
Stretch out
Make up the bed now
Sunlight
Kissing your face again
Breakfast
Coffee is waiting

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

51. You Are the Only One I Love by Jaymay

The first thing that you said to me was
“Jamie I love you, Jamie I love you, Jamie, Jamie, I love you”
And I’ve never been one to believe in love at first sight
But now I know it exists

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

52. Love Is What You Are by Old 97’s

Love is what you are
Not what you do
I know what you are
And I love you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

53. Don’t Let Me Fall by Lenka

You’re just the one that I’ve been waiting for
I’ll give you all that I have to give and more
But don’t let me fall
Don’t let me fall

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

54. Snowfall by Ingrid Michaelson

“I want a snowfall kind of love
The kind of love that keeps you in bed all day
Oh I want to walk through with you
And watch it all melt away”

Listen: Apple Music

55. More Than I Asked For by Joy Williams

“You and me
Underneath the evergreen,
Rosy cheeks,
Holding hands while the snow is falling”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

56. 30 Days by Never Shout Never

“I’m making a list, hell, I’ll check it twice
Of all the things you’ve done in my life
Then I’ll send it your way
So you see why I love you”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

57. Winter Moon by Mindy Gledhill

“On the A.M. radio, they’re playing Christmas songs
So horrendously off key, you loudly sing along
Cider simmers on the stove,
Reading Dickens by the glow
Of the light that lingers through the window”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

58. The Way I Am by Ingrid Michaelson

I’d buy you Rogaine
When you start losing all your hair
Sew on patches to all you tear
‘Cause I love you more than
I could ever promise

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

59. All My Bells Are Ringing by Lenka

“So take my heart
This Christmas
And wrap it
In a ribbon
And a bow”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

60. Blood Bank by Bon Iver

“That secret that we know that we don’t know how to tell
I’m in love with your honor, I’m in love with your cheeks
What’s that noise up the stairs, babe?
Is that Christmas morning creaks?”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

61. Mushaboom by Feist

“Old dirt road
Knee deep snow
Watching the fire as we grow old”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

62. It Really Is (A Wonderful Life) by Mindy Smith

“I’d never noticed that the crackle of a fire
Makes music when accompanied by kiss
And when did I start having dreams about pumpkin pies
There’s not a lot that’s sweeter than this”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

63. All That I Want by The Weepies

“Above the rooftops
The full moon dips its golden spoon
I wait on clip-clops, deer might fly
Why not? I met you”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

64. Cold December Night by Michael Bublé

“The twinkling of the lights
The scent of candles fill the household
Old Saint Nick has taken flight
With a heart on board so please be careful”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

65. It Snowed by Meaghan Smith

“It snowed last night
Everything is sparkling with diamond light
The road is bare
It’s four feet high
Honey let’s play hooky
Cause it snowed last night”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

66. Mango by Catey Shaw

Oh sweet mango baby
won’t you be mine?
I know you don’t like labels
but let me buy you some wine

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

67. Darlin’ by Dave Barnes

Darlin’ we got it made
Your kids are at your mama’s and baby all the bills are paid
How ’bout a kiss, honey I’ll meet you half way

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

68. Loser by Julian Moon

Full disclosure: One curse word in this one!

There’s a little bit of loser in us
Just two weirdos who fell in love
I guess we’re made from the same weird stuff
Being a loser with you doesn’t suck

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

69. Vintage by High Dive Heart

You’re timeless like an old stack of vinyl
Hundred-year-old bottle of wine-o
Love the classics but what do I know?
You’re the pair of Chucks I never wanna take off
The beat the DJ can’t help but drop
Your Mona Lisa makes my heart stop

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

70. I Don’t Know by Lisa Hannigan

I don’t know if you can dance
If the thought ever occurred to you
If you eat what you’ve been given or you push it around your plate
I’d like to cook for you all the same
I would want to
I am game

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

Get the Spotify Playlist

If you use Spotify, head over to this Unknown Love Songs playlist and click the heart button to add it to your own Spotify library. Bonus: As I discover new love songs, you’ll get extra songs not yet featured in this post!

Get your copy now: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Want More?

Check out my more specific love song playlists here:

• 16 Funny Love Songs Guaranteed to Make You Smile
• The 14 Best Love Songs You’ve Never Heard
• 25 Songs for the Perfect Wedding Playlist
• 14 Love Songs for the Perfect DIY Valentine’s Day Gift
• 12 Cozy Love Songs for Winter

Your Turn

What are your favorite unknown love songs? Share in a comment below!

The post The All-Time Best Unknown Love Songs: 70+ Underrated Love Songs appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

I was never into celebrating Valentine’s Day. In fact, I have ranted a time or two (or fifty) about how it’s a Hallmark holiday designed to get Americans to spend money on cards and flowers that end up in the trash a couple days later.

Not to mention the splurging on overpriced extravagant jewelry.

Forced romance? No, thank you.

And then I fell in love.

Scratch That

Yes, romance is best when spontaneous. OF COURSE it should come from the heart. And love is something to express year-round, not a checkbox to mark off one day a year.

But getting a ready-made excuse to act as sappy as humanly possible and shower your honey in over-the-top expressions of your love?

SIGN. ME. UP.

No, wait a second—can we have that every month?!

And I’m not talking bonbons and bling.

Now that we have four kids, we take advantage of any opportunity to stay connected as a couple—no matter how small.

For Valentine’s Day, we’ll celebrate by popping in a romantic comedy after the kids go to bed. (And okay, maybe some bonbons too.)

But Here’s My Problem

My feelings toward the typical romantic comedy are a lot like my feelings toward 50 Shades of Grey or Twilight. Or Diet Coke. I knew they weren’t high quality, but some unspecified addictive chemical in them kept me reading/drinking.

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

So just like I cut out Diet Coke, I want to cleanse myself of movies like The Ugly Truth and What’s Your Number.

Not because romantic comedies are by definition low quality. That is definitely not the case.

“Stop saying ‘chick flick’ like it’s ‘pile of rotten meat’ and stop saying ‘chick lit’ and ‘chick book’ and ‘chick movie’ and anything else that suggests that love stories are less than war stories, or that stories that end with kissing are inherently inferior to stories that end with people getting shot.”

No, I want to make room for “chick flicks” that will speak to me, a modern woman.

Show me a strong woman who is capable of solving problems on her own. A woman who isn’t magnetically drawn to the most chauvinistic man she’s ever met. A woman who has real life struggles beyond deciding which Manolo Blahnik to drop a whole paycheck on this week.

Because you know what?

We deserve a sweet, funny love story that doesn’t ask us to check our badassness at the theater door.

A Noble Quest for the Top 10 Romantic Comedies

It was actually my husband’s idea to embark on a quest to find good quality romantic comedies. So we’ve been watching one romantic comedy just about every night since the new year.

Our little project doesn’t come close to this doctoral research, but we did find some amazing little gems.

We started out with two criteria*:

1. The female lead must take an active role in solving her own problems, i.e. not wait around for a man to swoop in and save the day
2. The male lead must not be a stereotypical chauvinist, for example his interests must extend beyond eating steak and watching porn (sorry, Don Jon)

It’s no Bechdel Test, but it helped us weed out the ridiculous movies.

Related: How to Reconnect With Your Spouse Like Magic, According to Science {Printable}

Top 10 Romantic Comedies You’ll Fall in Love With

Here are the 10 films we loved most.

Another interesting tidbit for you: Not only are these movies fun to watch, they’re as effective as weekly marriage counseling at sustaining a healthy marriage. Science says so.

By the way, my husband Ty was an active participant in the process and endorses every one of these movies too. While I can’t promise all guys will like them, maybe a little social proof will help you out if you’re trying to convince your guy to sit down for a chick flick. Feel free to refer to me as “my friend from work” or “an old friend of mine” or “this totally awesome blogger I follow.” Whatever works for you.

I saved the best one for last. If you watch nothing else from the list, please please please watch that one.

* Our research was focused on hetero rom coms, so while of course there are some sweet, funny LGBT love stories out there, they aren’t in this particular roundup.

1. The American President

This is one of Ty’s all-time favorite movies, so he was happy for the excuse to watch it again.

• What It’s About: The President, a widower, is up for re-election when he crosses paths with an environmental lobbyist named Sydney Wade. They are immediately drawn to each other, but her high expectations of the President don’t exactly align with his political goals.
• Why We Loved It: So many snarky one-liners! Plus, when the President’s all “it’s just business, baby,” Sydney’s all “to hell it is, assface.”
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

2. Pitch Perfect

• What It’s About: At her dad’s urging, Beca heads off to college when all she really wants to do is get started on her career producing music. When her dad notices she’s going through the motions, he makes her join a club—an a cappella club. Then she meets Jesse, who makes it awfully hard to act like she doesn’t care about anything.
• Why We Loved It: The music, the laughs—it’s all aca-awesome.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

3. Definitely, Maybe

• What It’s About: Will just got a divorce, and his 10-year-old daughter Maya is none too happy about her parents splitting up. She drills her dad about his love life and how he ended up with her mom in the first place. As Will tells the story of all his previous loves, he realizes who the love of his life is.
• Why We Loved It: An honest but sweet movie about life after divorce.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

4. Going the Distance

• What It’s About: One night in New York City, journalist student Erin meets record company lackey Garrett, and sparks fly. The problem? Erin’s leaving in six weeks to go back to school. Can they make a long-distance relationship work?
• Why We Loved It: It’s refreshing to see real-life compromise presented on the big screen, instead of the woman just automatically giving up everything to follow the man.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

5. Bridesmaids

• What It’s About: Annie’s hit rock bottom—she lost her business and her boyfriend, and she’s dating a jerk. When her friend Lillian gets engaged and asks Annie to be her maid of honor, she has to put on a happy face and pretend to have it all under control.
• Why We Loved It: You may not think of this as a romantic comedy. But considering most women I know have struggled with dating guys who treat them poorly, I love how this movie tackles the idea.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

6. Leap Year

• What It’s About: Anna’s been dating Jeremy for several years, but he has yet to pop the question. Jeremy heads to Ireland for business, and as soon as he leaves Anna is reminded of an old Irish tradition. A man who receives a marriage proposal on Leap Day must accept it. So Anna hops on a plane to chase after Jeremy.
• Why We Loved It: If you’re a control freak like me, this movie is good therapy. And the gorgeous scenery will make you want to drop the kids off with grandma and hightail it to Ireland.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

7. In a World…

• What It’s About: Carol is a voice coach struggling to make a name for herself in the field of movie trailer voice-overs. Her father just so happens to be the reigning king of trailer voice-overs, but he doesn’t believe a woman can break into the business, let alone his daughter.
• Why We Loved It: Super cute and funny and fresh. I also loved how the people were normal looking and not impossibly beautiful.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

8. Admission

• What It’s About: Portia’s job as an admissions officer for Princeton is to sift through the thousands and thousands of applicants to find the best students. Then John calls. He’s the founder of an unconventional school, and he says he has the perfect student for Princeton. The only problem? He failed most of high school.
• Why We Loved It: Tina Fey’s character takes a calculated professional risk, but NOT to impress the dude.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

9. Silver Linings Playbook

• What It’s About: Pat lost his wife, his job, and his house, then served time in a state institution. Now he’s living with his parents and trying to rebuild his life, which revolves around getting his wife back. When Pat meets a mysterious girl with her own healthy dose of problems, they form a pact to help each other.
• Why We Loved It: This one’s definitely not your typical romantic comedy. It’s brutally real in spots, but the dance scene clinches it for me.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

10. About Time

• What It’s About: At the age of 21, Tim discovers a family secret: His father tells him the men in their family can travel back in time. Tim decides he’ll use his newfound power to get a girlfriend. But when he finally meets the love of his life Mary, a time-travel incident undoes their meeting and she doesn’t recognize him.
• Why We Loved It: As the credits started rolling on the screen, I wanted to go back in time immediately and watch it again from the beginning. But it was after 11:00 pm on a school night, so I had to wait until the next night. (For the record, I loved it even more the second time.) This movie is so beautiful. It’s easily made the list of my all-time favorites.
• Watch It: Amazon | iTunes

Want More?

Check out our latest roundup in 10 Surprisingly Good Romantic Comedies for the Modern Woman.

Your Turn

What’s your favorite romantic comedy? Leave a comment to share!

The post Top 10 Romantic Comedies for the Modern Woman appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

Some people collect stamps, or sports memorabilia, or Pez dispensers.

I collect love songs.

But not cheese-tacular junk like “My Heart Will Go On” or “Lady in Red.”

We’re talking modern, upbeat songs about real love—no heartbreak or unrequited love in this round-up.

Which makes my little unknown love songs collection the PERFECT ready-made Valentine’s Day gift from you to your honey.

Plus, these songs are so good you’ll want to add them to your own everyday playlist.

For an easy DIY Valentine’s Day gift that’ll get you major brownie points, buy a few of the love songs listed below and follow my tutorial on how to share a playlist. Wrap your playlist, maybe throw in a box of chocolate, and you’re done!

14 Unknown Love Songs for Your Valentine’s Day Playlist

For even more great love songs, be sure to check out the full love songs playlist linked at the end of this post.

Get Your Copy: The Best Conversation Starters for Couples

1. Stuck on You^† by Meiko

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

‘Cause you are the one I could see having fun with
Not just for the night, but for the rest of my life
You are the one I could never be done with
I want you tonight and for the rest of my life

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

2. Love Love Love (Let You Go) by Andy Grammer

No defenses I’m too deep for common sense
Well it’s love, love, love, love, love
Oh my I’m so delighted; I don’t try to even fight it
I think you should know that I will never let you go

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

3. The Little Things by Carlos Bertonatti

Run, run, run
Underneath my pillow case
And come, come, come
Closer to me, yeah
If life has taught me anything
It?’s all about the little things

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

4. Overwhelmed by Tim McMorris

I could sing a thousand songs about you, still that would not do
There’s a million tiny things that make the things that you do, you
I wouldn’t trade our time together, wouldn’t trade for anything
‘Cause nothing else here in the world can bring the happiness you bring

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

5. Thank You by Mozella

You fight off my enemies
You’d take a bullet for me
And you know I’d do the same for you
‘Cause that’s how we roll
Connected at the soul

Listen: Apple Music

6. All of You by Busby Marou

So if you choose always me
I’ll make a promise to choose all of you
And if you will follow me now
I’ll be always there to follow you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

7. Better Than Love by Griffin House

So when I’m walking down the road and feeling bad
Can’t understand the things you do
Nothing turns out the way we planned
You’re still my baby, and I’m still your man

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

8. Love by Matt White

And I, I, I, I, I…I can feel it in your kiss
It just gives me tender bliss
What is love, what is love?
I just want it to be love

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

9. Lucky by Kat Edmonson

Happiness
Feels like this
Your heart upon your sleeve
There’s a place
In time and space
Where we can all be free

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

10. 3 Rounds and a Sound by Blind Pilot

They’re playing our song
They’re playing our song
Can you see the lights?
Can you hear the hum
Of our song?

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

11. Brand New Day by Tim Myers

Wake up
Open your sleepy eyes
Stretch out
Make up the bed now
Sunlight
Kissing your face again
Breakfast
Coffee is waiting

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

12. You Are the Only One I Love by Jaymay

The first thing that you said to me was
“Jamie I love you, Jamie I love you, Jamie, Jamie, I love you”
And I’ve never been one to believe in love at first sight
But now I know it exists

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

13. Love Is What You Are by Old 97’s

Love is what you are
Not what you do
I know what you are
And I love you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

14. Don’t Let Me Fall by Lenka

You’re just the one that I’ve been waiting for
I’ll give you all that I have to give and more
But don’t let me fall
Don’t let me fall

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

Get your copy now: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Want More?

Check out 75+ of the Best Unknown Love Songs.

Your Turn

What’s your favorite contemporary, non-sappy love song? Leave a comment to share your fave!

Social media photo by D. Sharon Pruitt.

The post 14 Unknown Love Songs for the Perfect DIY Valentine’s Day Gift appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

My fiancé and I have been writing an ongoing love letter to each other for two years—but not how you might think.

A few years ago after we both emerged from the fog of divorce, we were a little jaded when it came to love and romance and marriage. By “a little,” I mean completely.

And then Cupid or God or whoever you want to call it took a look at those brand spankin’ new brick walls we’d just worked so hard to build up around our poor shriveled hearts—and he thought he’d have a bit of fun.

“I don’t believe in anything but myself
I don’t believe in anything but myself
But then you opened up a door, you opened up a door
Now I start to believe in something else”

Ingrid Michaelson, “Soldier”

Suddenly, all those rom coms and sappy love songs made TOTAL sense.

So we started a playlist. We called it—get ready for this—”Love Songs.”

Every time one of us came across a song whose lyrics came close to describing the intensity of what we were feeling, we’d send the song title to the other and add it to the playlist.

More than two years later, we’re still adding to the playlist. We’ve curated more than 100 of the best unknown love songs out there.

But you won’t find Celine Dion or “When a Man Loves a Woman” on our Love Songs playlist. Sappy need not apply. These are modern, upbeat tunes about real love—not heartbreak or temporary infatuation or stalking.

Now that we’re planning our wedding, it dawned on us we’ve got ourselves a ready-made wedding playlist on our hands.

25 Unknown Love Songs for Your Wedding—Or Just Because

Today, I’m sharing my top 25 favorite unknown love songs.

If you’re getting married, save money on a DJ and use this playlist at your wedding reception. Otherwise, just listen to a few of these love songs and call your honey to share your favorite. Bonus: Research shows doing that will give you a better energy boost than a cup of coffee.

Enjoy!

Get Your Copy: The Best Conversation Starters for Couples

1. The Lucky Ones^† by Tim Myers

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

Lately I’ve been smiling outside
I feel good, I feel light as a feather
Open up the window look out at the sky
Everything’s better
Ah, ah, ah
Ah, ah, ah
We’re the lucky ones

Listen: Apple Music

2. Fine By Me by Andy Grammer

I’m just saying it’s fine by me
If you never leave
And we can live like this forever
It’s fine by me

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

3. I Never by Rilo Kiley

So let’s take a loan out, put it down on a house
In a place we’ve never lived
In a place that exists in the pages of scripts
And the songs that they sing
And all of the beautiful things
That make you weep, but don’t have to make you weak

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

4. Oh, It Is Love by Hellogoodbye

Oh say, wouldn’t you like to be older and married with me?
Oh say, wouldn’t it be nice to know right now that we’ll be

Someday holding hands in the end
All our broken plans will have been
I will kiss you soft so you know

It is love from the first
Time I pressed my lips against yours
Thinking, “Oh, is it love?”

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

5. All Smiles by Jess Penner

Hands full of lemon drops all disappear
All lips like children, the voices we hear
They’re all smiles, they’re all smiles, they’re all smiles

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

6. Rhythm of Love by Plain White T’s

My heart beats like a drum
A guitar string to the strum
A beautiful song to be sung
She’s got blue eyes deep like the sea
That roll back when she’s laughing at me
She rises up like the tide
The moment her lips meet mine

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

7. Reasons to Love You by Meiko

I wanna fall asleep with you tonight
Wanna know that I am safe when you hold me tight
Wanna feel how I wanna feel, forever

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

8. Sweeter Than This by Katie Herzig

I’ll feed you ramen and you’ll braid my hair
Anything goes when you don’t even care
When you’re this far in love

If it gets any sweeter than this
I don’t want to know
If it gets any sweeter than this
I don’t want to know

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

9. Parentheses by The Blow

And when you’re holding me
We make a pair of parentheses
There’s plenty space to encase
Whatever weird way my mind goes
I know I’ll be safe in these arms

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

10. You Are the Best Thing by Ray LaMontagne

And baby, the way you move me it’s crazy
It’s like you see right through me
And make it easier
You please me you don’t even have to try

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

11. Life Less Ordinary by Carbon Leaf

The night you came into my life
Well it took the bones of me, took the bones of me
You blew away my storm and strife
And shook the bones of me, shook the bones of me

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

12. Toothpaste Kisses by The Maccabees

Lay with me, I’ll lay with you
We’ll do the things that lovers do
Put the stars in our eyes
And with heart-shaped bruises
And late night kisses
Divine

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

13. You Make Me Happy by Lindsey Ray

It’s the heart on your sleeve never making me wonder
It’s the bond that we tie up and over and under
You’re the sun and the rain and my grass is always green
With a kiss on my cheek, always letting me know
I’m the birds and the bees, I’m the apple in your eye
I know that you know that I know you’re all I need

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

14. Question by Old 97’s

She’d had no idea, she started to cry
She said in a good way
He took her by the hand, walked her back home
They took the long way

Some day somebody’s gonna ask you
A question that you should say yes to
Once in your life
Maybe tonight I’ve got a question for you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

15. Everyday by Vetiver

I say it all the time
You don’t pay no mind
When I tell you that I love you
Now do ya?
I wanna be clear
All I wanna hear is your voice
Have your face to see
How happy that would make me

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

16. The Idea of Growing Old by The Features

We can talk all night, we can talk all day
We can play charades when there is nothing to say
You turn me on to the idea of growing old

I can make you angry, you can make me a smile
We can make origami with the kids for a while
You turn me on to the idea of growing old

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

17. Home by Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros

Hot and heavy, pumpkin pie
Chocolate candy, Jesus Christ
Ain’t nothing please me more than you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

18. What I Wouldn’t Do by A Fine Frenzy

If we were children I would bake you a mud pie
Warm and brown beneath the sun
Never learned to climb a tree but I would try
Just to show you what I’d done

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

19. Sleepy Tigers by Her Space Holiday

In a week when I fly back home
We’re gonna jump in bed and be all alone
you’ll make biscuits and I’ll make tea
We’ll curl up close and then fall asleep
To the sound of no one else no else around

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

20. Blue Eyes by Cary Brothers

All the lights on and you are alive
But you can’t point the way to your heart
So sublime, when the stars are aligned
But you don’t know
You don’t know the greatness you are

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

21. 5 Years Time by Noah & The Whale

Oh well, in five years time we could be walking ’round a zoo
With the sun shining down over me and you
And there’ll be love in the bodies of the elephants too
And I’ll put my hands over your eyes, but you’ll peep through

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

22. Lost in the Moment by Daniel Lee Kendall

You were wearin’ that pretty white dress
You wore it with your pretty smile
I was trying to do my best
To see you smile your pretty smile at me

Listen: Apple Music

23. Little Romance by Ingrid Michaelson

I see you’ve pressed those pants
I see you’ve styled that hair
There doesn’t seems to be much of it there
You’re in the mood to dance
Can I have this chance
To be your little romance?

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

24. Brand New Day by Tim Myers

Simple things
Is what life’s made of
Happiness
Is not that hard to find
I’m in love
And I’m so unmoving in this sand of life

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

25. All I Want Is You by Barry Louis Polisar

If you were a wink, I’d be a nod
If you were a seed, well I’d be a pod
If you were the floor, I’d wanna be the rug
And if you were a kiss, I know I’d be a hug

All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

Get your copy now: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Want More?

Check out 75+ of the Best Unknown Love Songs.

Your Turn

What’s your favorite modern love song? Share your pick in a comment below!

Social media photo by Raúl Santos de la Cámara.

The post 25 Love Songs for the Perfect Wedding Playlist appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

As parents, my husband and I spend our days taking turns dealing with the emotional tempests of a toddler, coaching the bigger kids to resolve their latest kerfuffle, and executing on a bedtime “routine” that involves the kids getting out of bed 72 billion times every night.

Not to mention the never-ending cycle of figuring out what to feed the kids, convincing them to sit down long enough to eat, and getting everything cleaned up before we have to start all over at the next meal.

In the midst of all that, we barely have time for a single uninterrupted grown-up conversation, let alone to make sure we stay connected as a couple. So it’s all too easy to lose sight of how lucky we are to have each other.

But I know we can’t let that happen. In our former lives, my husband and I have both been through divorce. We know the consequences of not making time to connect as a couple – and we’re fierce in our resolve to keep our relationship strong.

Bonus: As a bonus for joining my weekly newsletter, get a free cheat sheet of 60 simple ideas for how to connect with your partner right now.

The Problem With Date Nights

Unfortunately, my husband and I don’t do date nights very often. Because with no family in town, “date night” becomes synonymous with “hire a babysitter,” and that can get awfully expensive.

You can always do an at-home date night – even if it’s just trying out a new recipe or enjoying a movie after the kids go to bed.

But honestly?

We’re too tired.

After spending every day wrangling four kids and trying to keep up with the endless dishes and laundry and vacuuming, we consider it a success if we both manage to stay awake past 8:00 pm.

So how do you keep the spark alive without an official date night?

How to Connect With Your Partner: 7 Ways to Rekindle the Romance in 7 Minutes or Less

To keep our marriage strong, I decided to research the best science-backed hacks for how to connect with your partner – even when you’re tired and busy – and I compiled it into a list to share with you.

The best part? Every idea in this list will take you 7 minutes or less.

1. Give It 6 Seconds

I’ve heard this advice from several happy couples, and it works for me and Ty too.

Hug and kiss every morning and every night. But make sure they’re long ones, especially the hug.

According to The Happiness Project^†, you should hold a hug for at least six seconds to get the happy chemicals oxytocin and serotonin flowing. They’re good stuff because they boost your mood and promote bonding. Ever since we tried this hugging technique, I now fully support to the six-second advice.

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

When you get caught up in the day-to-day routine, it’s too easy to make it through a whole day (or more) without sharing that simple physical affection that keeps partners feeling close. Don’t skimp on this one.

2. Get Visual

If you’re feeling disconnected from your partner, look back through your photos on your phone to remind yourself of your favorite memories of being together – trips, holiday celebrations, those four hundred pictures you took the day you closed on your first house.

These are times when you felt most connected, and reliving those memories can help you rekindle that spark.

After you find a photo that makes you smile, text it to your partner.

3. Ask the Right Question

Research shows that couples who have engaging conversations every day – real uninterrupted grown-up conversations – are better able to handle the stress of parenting life and stay connected.

But when you’re tired, it’s hard to come up with ideas for what to talk about aside from what you need at the grocery store and who’s due for their annual well-check.

So I set out on a quest to find out which conversation topics for couples will make you feel closer, according to the latest research on happy relationships that stand the test of time. And over the course of several months, I compiled a collection of the 150 best conversation starters for couples. Not according to me, some random mom. But according to the experts who study successful and happy relationships.

My husband and I have been using these questions for couples throughout the last couple years, ever since our youngest was born. Anytime we want to connect quickly, we’ll grab a question and ask it. Instant connection, every time.

The questions force us to slow down, look each other in the eye, and really listen to each other.

Sure, sometimes we have to kick the kids outside or sneak away to the bedroom for a few minutes just to have a chance of being able to hear each other’s answers.

But that’s a small price to pay for keeping our relationship healthy and strong.

4. Check It At the Door

When I’m driving home after an appointment, my mind wanders back through my day and tends to get stuck on the things that didn’t go so well.

So when I walk in the door and see Ty, it feels natural to transition straight from a quick greeting to venting about my day.

But this doesn’t make for a good start to your evening together. From the book Wellbeing:

Emotions spread quickly from one person to the next. When you see a friend who is happy, this often causes you to smile, and as a result, you feel better. Or if you have a frustrating meeting late in the day, your emotional state is likely to transfer to your spouse when you get home. Because we tend to synchronize our moods with the people around us, our emotions influence one another throughout the day.

Before you walk in the door at the end of the day (or before your partner walks in the door), take five minutes to think about something good that happened to you. If nothing good happened to you, think of something you love about your partner so that’s on your mind when you see them.

Then after you get the evening off to a good start with a positive perspective for both of you, you can circle back and vent about the not-so-great stuff.

5. Do It With Words

Ty and I text each other constantly about how our day is going – How was your meeting this morning? What time are you heading home? Would it be bad to have pizza for dinner 5 nights in a row? But sometimes he’ll surprise me with a special message out of the blue. He tells me he misses me or that he can’t wait to see me, or just sends a simple “I love you.”

One day back when I had a corporate desk job, my cube neighbor and I were walking to a meeting when she got a text from her husband thanking her for everything she does for their family. Even though it was YEARS ago, I still remember the look on her face – an infectious mixture of surprise, joy, validation, and love. That text totally made her day.

Research shows that in strong, loving relationships that stand the test of time, the partners share more positive statements than critical ones. In fact, you need a ratio of at least five positive comments to every critical one.

If texts aren’t your thing, here are a few other ideas for sharing what you appreciate about your partner:

• Send a funny e-card.
• Stick a colorful Post-It Note somewhere they’re sure to see it, like on their nightstand, on their pillow, in their underwear drawer, next to their toothbrush, and so on.
• Write a message on the bathroom mirror with washable window markers.
• Write a letter, then leave it in their work bag or car to find later.
• Fill out a postcard and mail it to them.

6. Get Some New Material

Research by psychologist John Gottman has shown that sharing humor with your partner is one of the best ways you can strengthen your relationship.

Learn a new joke, find a funny news story online, or make a mental note to share something from your day that made you laugh. If you’re short on time for looking around, do what I do: check a funny person’s Twitter account for good one-liners. My faves:

• Abby Heugel @AbbyHasIssues
• James Breakwell @XplodingUnicorn
• Ramblin Mama @ramblinma
• Simon Holland @simoncholland
• Stephen Colbert @StephenAtHome

7. Shhh

We’ve made a promise to each other. We always try to go to bed at the same time.

Sometimes it’s hard to drag myself away from a marathon binge of Brooklyn Nine Nine reruns, but I’m always glad after I do.

Because when you turn off the lights and climb into bed next to each other, magic happens.

With no distractions, your body and mind start to unwind from the day. You’ll remember something cute one of the kids said earlier in the day, whisper your hopes for tomorrow, fantasize about your next vacation. Or maybe you’ll both just take a deep breath and pass out from sheer exhaustion.

(By the way, if you thought I was talking about a different kind of “magic,” try going to bed naked. Ahem.)

Related: The Best 100 Date Night Ideas for Parents—Even When You’re Exhausted

Get Your Free Cheat Sheet

When you need ideas for how to connect with your partner even when you’re busy and tired, use this cheat sheet of 60 simple ways to reconnect.

1. Get the free cheat sheet. Join my weekly-ish newsletter and as a bonus, you’ll get the printable! Just click here to get it and subscribe.
2. Print. Any paper will do the trick, but card stock would be ideal.
3. Tuck your cheat sheet somewhere handy like your purse or wallet. Or if your spouse is in on it, hang it on your fridge. Then when you need an idea for connecting, pick a random idea and do it.

Here’s a sneak peek of your printable cheat sheet:

Download now: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Your Turn

What’s your best advice for how to connect with your partner, even when you’re busy and tired? Share your tip in a comment below!

The post How to Connect With Your Partner: 7 Sweet + Simple Tricks for When You’re Busy or Tired appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.

To help you get in the mood for Valentine’s Day, here are a few of my favorite contemporary, unknown love songs. If you like “Ho Hey” by The Lumineers, you should like these lesser known – but no less awesome – love songs.

I had two important criteria for the list:

• The lyrics had to be about actual love, not heartbreak or betrayal or stalking.
• Sappy need not apply.

In other words, these songs won’t send you running to the nearest vomitorium. So if you’re looking for Celine Dion or “When a Man Loves a Woman,” this isn’t the playlist for you. If, on the other hand, you’re looking for fresh, plain ol’ good music to play for your honey – enjoy! This playlist also works great for any ol’ date night throughout the year or even for a wedding.

Get Your Copy: The Best Conversation Starters for Couples

14 Best Unknown Love Songs

Below, you’ll find the best little-known love songs to share with your special person and put a smile on their face. For even more obscure love songs, check out 75+ of the Best Unknown Love Songs.

1. 5 Years Time by Noah & The Whale^†

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

Oh well, in five years time we could be walking ’round a zoo
With the sun shining down over me and you
And there’ll be love in the bodies of the elephants too
And I’ll put my hands over your eyes, but you’ll peep through

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

2. All ‘Cause of You by The 88

I’ve been sinking through the drain of love,
Lift my eyes to skies of up above,
Listen to me this is how I feel,
Since I knew you all my thoughts are real,
You’re the only one i wanna do,
Everything’s new,
And it’s all ’cause of you

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

3. Lost in the Moment by Daniel Lee Kendall

You were wearin’ that pretty white dress
You wore it with your pretty smile
I was trying to do my best
To see you smile your pretty smile at me

Listen: Apple Music

4. Just a Boy by Angus & Julia Stone

One kiss from you, and I’m drunk up on your potion
That big old smile is all you wore
Girl you make me want to feel
Things I’ve never felt before

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

5. Wonderin by Nicole Reynolds

My heart is made of instruments
That strum this song for you
They bend and twist each simple pitch
In hopes you’ll feel it too

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

6. Tighten Up by The Black Keys

I don’t need to get steady
I know just how I feel
I’m telling you to be ready
My dear

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

7. The Girl by City and Colour

While I’m off chasing my own dreams
Sailing around the world
Please know that I’m yours to keep
My beautiful girl

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

8. When We First Met by Hellogoodbye

As I kept track of every haircut that we ever had
I could, I could see how long it had been, oh
Oh, how long it had been
And this thought, made it clearer
I ought to be near her

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

9. Sleepy Tigers by Her Space Holiday

Oh I like you so very much so much in fact I gotta wake you up
It’s not that I have words to speak
I just wanna see you looking at me

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

10. You’re What I’m Looking For by Rooney

When I look at you, my troubles all go away
I’m someone new, it feels just like a new day
When you hold me tight, I get lost in your arms
I know tonight I’ve finally found what I’m looking for

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

11. OK by Holly Conlan

And now I’m confused on top of it all
I was ready to lose, and ready to fall
And something about the way that you look at me
Makes it feel okay

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

12. Gray or Blue by Jaymay

But your sweatshirt says it all
With the hood over your face
I can’t keep starin’ at your mouth
Without wonderin’ how it tastes

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

13. Be My Thrill by The Weepies

Be my youth
My kissing booth
My little sweet tooth
My beauty and truth

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

14. Sweeter Than This by Katie Herzig

I’ll feed you Ramen and you’ll braid my hair
Anything goes when you don’t even care
When you’re this far in love

Listen: Apple Music | Amazon Music

Bonus: An Easy, Cheap Gift for Your Valentine

Buy a few of these songs, then burn them to a USB flash drive using my tutorial on how to share a playlist. Stick it in a small box, add a pretty red bow, and you’re done!

Get your copy now: 150 Conversation Starters for Couples That Will Make You Feel Closer Than Ever

Want More?

Check out 75+ of the Best Unknown Love Songs.

Your Turn

What’s your favorite contemporary, non-sappy love song? Leave a comment to share your fave!

The post The 14 Best Love Songs You’ve Never Heard appeared first on Happy You, Happy Family.