Comments on: How to Stay Connected to Your Child When You Share Custody https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/ Sun, 14 Jan 2024 14:34:07 +0000 hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.8.3 By: Annie https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-39206 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-39206 Dang it, now my shirt is all wet after blubbering.

Thank you for sharing. My little ones father visits her at school. I haven’t worked up the courage because I don’t want to upset her. I was angry at her father for visiting during my week because I felt like it would just upset her. Your perspective has given me some understanding and a little courage too.

Thank you again for sharing.

]]> By: Kara Critchlow https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-29748 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-29748 In reply to Brittany.

Couldn’t agree more. If I could go back and fix the mistakes I made that put me in his position – choosing to involve a sperm donor or not in this little life they don’t deserve or even want. That will go to my grave with me as my biggest regret in life.

]]> By: Kara Critchlow https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-29747 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-29747 In reply to Alyssa.

It is some of the most powerful grief one can suffer, i hate to hear so many mothers that have likely done it all all along like myself having to share the precious time with the child we carried with someone likely much less invested. How do we do it??

]]> By: Kara Critchlow https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-29745 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-29745 Thank you for sharing your pain, it made me feel less alone in what can only be described as torrential grief when forced to hand over the child you carried and raised to someone that is so ignorant to just choose to give away precious time with that child to a camp or sitter when you would do anything to have those minutes yourself. I’m sure I’ll be back to read more when my time with mine is up again.

]]> By: Brittany https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-8243 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-8243 I just happened upon this post. It’s so raw and real for me, it hurts. Before this new reality, I didn’t know this pain existed. Now I hate that I know, and despise that I live it. Reading the comments and hearing how many other mothers feel the same pain doesn’t help. I wish it didn’t have to be and never was.

]]> By: Alyssa https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-8206 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-8206 I just read your blog and I’m in tears. Although the I feel I’m in tears quite often. I’m in a custody battle now and I have been a stay at home mom to my little girl for two years. I am facing the next step which will mean beginning to have to be without her 2 or 3 days at a time and my soul is crushing. When I think of it all it just is too awful to bare. My heart breaks in a million Pieces for my little girl. It doesn’t seem fair at all. Why do we have to be separated. Why should she not be able to see her mommy every day and night. Why can’t I kiss her goodnight and hug her good morning every day. This is my baby.

]]> By: Kelly Holmes https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-7323 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-7323 In reply to Karrie Hill.

Karrie, I’m so sorry to hear you’re struggling with this too. We’ve been having this weekly schedule for 7 years now, I think. I would love to tell you it gets easier. It has gotten less heart-wrenching, but it still hurts. We’re used to the schedule now, but sometimes it’s just hard. We try to Facetime as often as possible when we’re apart, and that helps. I wish there were a magic fix for everyone in this difficult situation. Sending you strength for the hard times. <3

]]> By: Karrie Hill https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-7228 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-7228 I realize this is a few years old but I stumbled upon it. Every other week I feel like a childless mother. Devastating, I hurt so bad and I feel like I’m scarring my children. They have a good home life at their dad’s and at my place but this every other week stuff kills me. All these years later how are you and Abby adjusting?
Thanks!
Karrie

]]> By: Bronwyn Taylor https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-6966 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-6966 I really needed this post and the other one you have on missing Abby. I’m struggling so much, literally been crying for 2 hrs because I dropped my almost 4 yr old daughter off at dayhome this morning and wont see her until the end of the week. I’m pregnant with a little girl and terrified my older girl will feel replaced and get less attention…and time….the time I cherish too much sometimes. Thank you for this.

]]> By: Jus https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-6778 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-6778 Hi, I’ve read these several times and they are beautiful and always make me cry. I understand everything. I am a mother of 4 and my oldest son is your Abby. I share custody with his father and missing him is one of these hardest things I go through every week when he’s not with me. I understand that “extra dose”. I’ve seen the tears and I’ve tried hard to hold back the tears at the school too. No one really understands- thank you for putting this out there. I truly, truly appreciate it. You are a good Mom.

]]> By: Lisa https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-6263 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-6263 Thank you for sharing this! I’m struggling to co-parent with my boys’ father, who is a covert narcissist. He has been given more visitation time and yet, is taking them less. On one hand, I am grateful that he is taking less time to mentally abuse them, but my heart aches watching them struggle with his absence.

This post was a great example of who I can be for my boys, and something I can do to encourage them along the way! I’m sorry you’re going through this. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability in such a way that inspires others.

]]> By: Victoria https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-6005 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-6005 In reply to Terri.

There is justification. A child needs both of his or her parents equally even if the parents can’t be together. You divorced your ex, but you both didn’t divorce your children.

]]> By: Courtney Williams https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-5844 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-5844 This is me! I have a 10 year old boy who is the BEST most well behaved child in every aspect of his life! We have week on week off and I now have a 9 month old daughter. And it kills me that he will miss out on so many things that we do with our family when he is not there!

]]> By: Karen https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-5645 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-5645 Tear Tear… Man, I don’t read blog posts often but the title drew my attention. I have felt this way for a couple of yrs now and it hasn’t gotten much easier with time. At least it sure doesn’t feel easier. But it is refreshing to know that I was not alone in this pain. And that I was not the only parent dying to see their child on their off week. I still find it very painful to feel like my ex husband and his current wife go out of their way to ensure I don’t get to see him as much and what not but I pray that this will soon get better.

]]> By: Fay https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-5534 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-5534 Poor Abby

]]> By: Scott Schnipper https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-5353 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-5353 I must’ve missed the point of the headline as I had hoped there was a balm, or perhaps a practical tip, for staying connected with my 8-year-old when he’s off with mom for five days at a stretch.

And the phone, Hang Out and email go unanswered. He’s in third grade and I’m unaware of parents being invited to elementary school lunch once weekly and, the hateful other partner, would no doubt claim it somehow violated the custody agreement.

So, while the tale of Abby and Bailey is loving, the post never really got round to addressing other tricks to cope. Alas.

]]> By: Terri https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-4333 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-4333 I am doing the every other week during the summers and it is incredibly hard to do so week after week, I see it hard for her. I am not sure I see justification in all of it but I am trying and I know this story all too well as I do have lunch with my only child once a week and I too think she feels this way. Bless you and thank you kindly for your story.

]]> By: Marisa Franca Stewart https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-3204 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-3204 You did succeed in touching my heart and I’m sniffling. I can’t imagine how hard it would be.

]]> By: Alex https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-3198 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-3198 Oh man, my eyes are leaking. Can’t imagine how hard it must be

]]> By: Stacy of KSW https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/every-other-week-breaks-me/#comment-2797 https://happyyouhappyfamily.com/?p=3506#comment-2797 and now I’m crying. Thanks for sharing this one and what a sweet, smart, brave little girl you have.

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