{"id":10209,"date":"2016-10-11T09:15:40","date_gmt":"2016-10-11T14:15:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/?p=10209"},"modified":"2021-07-11T14:51:50","modified_gmt":"2021-07-11T19:51:50","slug":"discipline-your-child","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/discipline-your-child\/","title":{"rendered":"The 3-Letter Word That Will Overhaul the Way You Discipline Your Kid"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"meta-desc\">Inside: When you discipline your child, remember this 3-step trick that will help you get through those tough parenting moments while also helping your child learn.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>We&rsquo;d just collected my third grader from school and made it back home again, which meant my two littlest ones had been held hostage in the car for <strong>an hour<\/strong> round-trip.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Which is why the second my feet crossed the threshold, 1-year-old Charlie wriggled out of my arms and headed straight for the LEGOs, with 3-year-old Bailey at her heels.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Charlie picked up a bowl filled with LEGOs, and Bailey <strong>snatched<\/strong> it from her. Charlie threw her head back and let out a high-pitched wail.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I sighed the sigh of refereeing your thousandth sibling fight of the day. &ldquo;Bailey, she was having that.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;I want it.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Charlie&rsquo;s scream went up a notch, and I resisted the urge to just grab the bowl from Bailey and give it back. &ldquo;You can have it when she&rsquo;s done.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;No, I want it!&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Little Charlie reached an arm out to the bowl, and Bailey slapped it away.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;Bailey! You just hit Charlie! You&rsquo;re being mean right now.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Now<\/strong> Bailey&rsquo;s face look like <em>I&rsquo;d<\/em> slapped <em>her<\/em>. The determination to keep the toys to herself melted away, and the corners of her mouth turned down.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;I&rsquo;m not mean.&rdquo; Her shoulders drooped. &ldquo;I&rsquo;m a nice person.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n<style>.kb-table-of-content-nav.kb-table-of-content-id_1179b9-88 .kb-table-of-content-wrap{padding-top:0px;padding-right:0px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;border-top-width:0px;border-right-width:0px;border-bottom-width:0px;border-left-width:0px;}.kb-table-of-content-nav.kb-table-of-content-id_1179b9-88 .kb-table-of-contents-title-wrap{padding-top:0px;padding-right:0px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;}.kb-table-of-content-nav.kb-table-of-content-id_1179b9-88 .kb-table-of-contents-title{font-weight:regular;font-style:normal;text-transform:uppercase;}.kb-table-of-content-nav.kb-table-of-content-id_1179b9-88 .kb-table-of-content-wrap .kb-table-of-content-list{font-weight:regular;font-style:normal;margin-top:var(--global-kb-spacing-sm, 1.5rem);margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:0px;margin-left:0px;}<\/style>\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-a-warning\">A Warning<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>The streaks running down her face were my <strong>warning sign<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>With my toddler and preschooler crying in unison, I forced myself to stop. Rewind the tape in my brain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>&ldquo;You&rsquo;re being mean right now.&rdquo;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Those are the words I&rsquo;d said to my child. <em>But I didn&rsquo;t say she <strong>was<\/strong> mean!<\/em> I thought.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<p>My mind flipped through a Rolodex of things I wanted to say now. Things I <em>should<\/em> have said:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>You took a toy from your sister, then you hit her.<\/li><li>Hitting is not okay, and now Charlie&rsquo;s sad.<\/li><li>How can you help Charlie feel better?<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Bailey&rsquo;s shoulders shook from her sobs. Charlie took the bowl of LEGOs from her big sister&rsquo;s hands, and Bailey didn&rsquo;t <strong>even<\/strong> flinch.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I bit my tongue. This wasn&rsquo;t the time for logic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"428\" data-pin-id=\"128000814395279800\" data-pin-description=\"When it comes to discipline for kids, the biggest mistake we make as parents is with the *words* we use to address our kids' behavior. Here's why it matters, plus a 3-step fix for child discipline that will help with even the most difficult child. This is a MUST read for positive parenting! #positiveparenting #parenting #parentingtips #gentleparenting #discipline #positivediscipline #kidsbehavior #kids\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-troubled-kid.jpg\" alt=\"The mistake I made when disciplining my child\" class=\"wp-image-10245\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-troubled-kid.jpg 640w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-troubled-kid-300x201.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-troubled-kid.jpg\"><figcaption>Photo by <a href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/donnieray\/21387951133\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Donnie Ray Jones<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-still-i-didn-t-want-to-admit-it\">Still, I Didn&rsquo;t Want to Admit It<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>I&rsquo;d said something that hurt my three-year-old because she acted like three-year-olds do. Something that hurt her so deeply, her body crumpled in response. Something I would never say to my husband or to another adult.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;I said you were <em>being<\/em> mean,&rdquo; I said. &ldquo;I didn&rsquo;t say you <em>are<\/em> mean.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She looked up at me, her eyes red. &ldquo;I&rsquo;m not mean. I&rsquo;m a nice person,&rdquo; she repeated.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And it <strong>hit me<\/strong>. I would never tell my child &ldquo;You&rsquo;re mean&rdquo; or &ldquo;You&rsquo;re ungrateful&rdquo; or &ldquo;You&rsquo;re a brat.&rdquo; But I definitely have told them &ldquo;You&rsquo;re <em>being<\/em> mean&rdquo; or &ldquo;You&rsquo;re <em>acting<\/em> ungrateful&rdquo; &ndash; and once I clearly remember saying &ldquo;You&rsquo;re acting like a brat&rdquo; to my oldest.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But what&rsquo;s the difference between telling another person they <em>are<\/em> something bad versus telling them they&rsquo;re <em>being<\/em> something bad?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Were these labels helping my children learn an important life lesson? Or were my words introducing shame and sadness, <strong>squashing<\/strong> any potential for them to learn from the situation?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" data-pin-id=\"128000814395279800\" data-pin-description=\"When it comes to discipline for kids, the biggest mistake we make as parents is with the *words* we use to address our kids' behavior. Here's why it matters, plus a 3-step fix for child discipline that will help with even the most difficult child. This is a MUST read for positive parenting! #positiveparenting #parenting #parentingtips #gentleparenting #discipline #positivediscipline #kidsbehavior #kids\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-sad-kid-steps.jpg\" alt=\"The impact of my words\" class=\"wp-image-10238\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-sad-kid-steps.jpg 640w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-sad-kid-steps-300x200.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-sad-kid-steps.jpg\"><figcaption>Photo by <a href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/donnieray\/25771614245\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Donnie Ray Jones<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-the-answer\">The Answer<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>I thought back to when I was a kid. When my uncle called me &ldquo;grumpy&rdquo; or my sister called me &ldquo;lazy&rdquo; or my teacher called me &ldquo;shy.&rdquo; Labels stick. More than 30 years later, they stick.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The idea of my careless words to my three-year-old sticking 30 years <strong>later<\/strong>? My eyes filled.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I promised myself I&rsquo;d figure out the answer once and for all &ndash; what effect do my words really have on my kids? I spent several nights after the kids were in bed reading article after article, post after post. Here are the highlights of what I found:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>When your child is shamed for her behavior, she&rsquo;s so wrapped up in her own negative emotions that she&rsquo;s <a href=\"http:\/\/www.heysigmund.com\/how-to-avoid-shaming\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">less capable of feeling empathy<\/a> toward others.<br><strong>Translation:<\/strong> Bailey couldn&rsquo;t care about how she&rsquo;d made Charlie feel because she was wrapped up in her own hurt feelings.<\/li><li>When fear and stress enter into the picture for your child, <a href=\"http:\/\/greatergood.berkeley.edu\/article\/item\/nine_things_educators_need_to_know_about_the_brain\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">learning stops<\/a>.<br><strong>Translation:<\/strong> Because Bailey was now stressed about me calling her &ldquo;mean,&rdquo; she couldn&rsquo;t learn a better approach for sharing the LEGOs.<\/li><li>Labeling your child&rsquo;s behavior (or personality) in a negative way becomes a <a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Self-fulfilling_prophecy\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">self-fulfilling prophecy<\/a>. In other words, when you declare something like this to yourself or another person, it&rsquo;s enough to influence your behavior to fulfill that declaration of &ldquo;truth.&rdquo; For example, let&rsquo;s say you&rsquo;re nervous about giving a presentation and think to yourself, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll probably forget all the words.&rdquo; Then you probably will &ndash; you&rsquo;re living &ldquo;down&rdquo; to a self-fulfilling prophecy. This phenomenon even has a name &ndash; the <a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Golem_effect\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Golem effect<\/a>. But if you tell yourself, &ldquo;I&rsquo;m excited to share what I know,&rdquo; then you&rsquo;re more likely to do well.<br><strong>Translation:<\/strong> By labeling Bailey as &ldquo;mean,&rdquo; I increased the chances she&rsquo;ll behave in a way that fits that negative label.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>All this to say: If my end goal is to teach my kids to not take things without asking, to clean up after themselves, to shut the toilet lid when they&rsquo;re done &ndash; using a label like &ldquo;mean&rdquo; or &ldquo;messy&rdquo; or &ldquo;gross&rdquo; wasn&rsquo;t moving us toward that goal. In fact, my words were painting a picture of the exact <strong>opposite<\/strong> outcome I wanted, effectively inviting my child to live &ldquo;down&rdquo; to that picture.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>No matter the verb that came before the label, all labeling was doing was hurting my child and putting distance between us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Related: <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/how-to-connect-with-your-child\/\">How to Connect With Your Child: The Magic of the 5:1 Ratio<\/a> {Printable}<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"428\" data-pin-id=\"128000814395279800\" data-pin-description=\"When it comes to discipline for kids, the biggest mistake we make as parents is with the *words* we use to address our kids' behavior. Here's why it matters, plus a 3-step fix for child discipline that will help with even the most difficult child. This is a MUST read for positive parenting! #positiveparenting #parenting #parentingtips #gentleparenting #discipline #positivediscipline #kidsbehavior #kids\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/how-to-connect-with-your-child-kid-doll-step.jpg\" alt=\"How using labels during discipline affects kids\" class=\"wp-image-10173\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/how-to-connect-with-your-child-kid-doll-step.jpg 640w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/how-to-connect-with-your-child-kid-doll-step-300x201.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/how-to-connect-with-your-child-kid-doll-step.jpg\"><figcaption>Photo by <a href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/donnieray\/16174488497\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Donnie Ray Jones<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-3-important-steps-when-disciplining-your-kid\">3 Important Steps When Disciplining Your Kid<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>This epiphany opened my eyes to the immense power my words have with my children. But I&rsquo;m not naive enough to think that an epiphany is <em>all<\/em> I need to stop myself from talking that way from here forward.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So I came up with a <strong>3-step plan<\/strong>, and I&rsquo;ve been using it ever since that day:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\"><li><strong>In through your nose<\/strong> &ndash; Breathe in because when you&rsquo;re breathing in, you can&rsquo;t say something you&rsquo;ll regret. (Sometimes I bite my tongue, too, for good measure.)<\/li><li><strong>Report what you see<\/strong> &ndash; Pretend you&rsquo;re a court reporter. Because she doesn&rsquo;t see &ldquo;mean&rdquo; or &ldquo;naughty&rdquo; or &ldquo;brat.&rdquo; She sees: &ldquo;You took a toy from your sister, then you hit her.&rdquo; or &ldquo;You threw the ball inside the house.&rdquo; or &ldquo;You colored on the dining room table with a Sharpie.&rdquo;<\/li><li><strong>Ask for your child&rsquo;s ideas on moving forward<\/strong> &ndash; Because you haven&rsquo;t shamed your kid, her brain is open to learning from what happened. And you get a ready-made teachable moment plus an opportunity to develop your kid&rsquo;s problem-solving skills. For example, you might ask, &ldquo;How can you help your sister feel better?&rdquo; or &ldquo;What can you do next time you feel like throwing the ball?&rdquo; or &ldquo;How can we clean the table?&rdquo; This isn&rsquo;t a test or a lecture in the form of rhetorical questions. Wait for your kid to share an idea &ndash; and remember she&rsquo;s still practicing at this problem-solving stuff so she may need a few <strong>more<\/strong> seconds than you&rsquo;d expect. If she&rsquo;s hesitant, you can reassure her, like this: &ldquo;I know we can fix this together. Tell me what you&rsquo;re thinking.&rdquo;<\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Related: <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/angry-mother\/\">How to Go From Angry Mother to Happy Mom: With 5 Simple Hair Ties<\/a> {Printable}<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-how-to-remember-this-3-step-trick-when-you-discipline-your-child\">How to Remember This 3-Step Trick When You Discipline Your Child<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>When your kid misbehaves or just behaves in a way you don&rsquo;t like, just remember&hellip;<strong>IRA<\/strong>. I know it makes zero sense, but stick with me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Picture a sweet grandma. She gently guides kids towards better behavior but never loses her temper &ndash; because she raised 10 kids and knows what&rsquo;s up with this parenting business. She bends down to look a child right in the eye, even though her knees aren&rsquo;t what they used to be. And her reserves of patience are absolutely limitless. She waits for a child to think through something on their own, her eyes crinkling in delightful expectation of this little brain stretching and growing <em>right before<\/em> her very eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This grandma is <strong>my hero<\/strong>, and her name is Ira. In Hebrew, <a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Ira_(name)\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Ira means<\/a> &ldquo;watchful.&rdquo; Ira is also the short form of a Greek name that means &ldquo;peace.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And so in these tough parenting moments, imagine Grandma IRA right by your side &ndash; a watchful, peaceful soul. IN through your nose, REPORT what you see, and ASK for your child&rsquo;s ideas.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Related: <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/how-to-reconnect-with-your-child\/\">10 Miracle Phrases to Help You Reconnect With Your Child<\/a> {Printable}<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"451\" data-pin-id=\"128000814395279800\" data-pin-description=\"When it comes to discipline for kids, the biggest mistake we make as parents is with the *words* we use to address our kids' behavior. Here's why it matters, plus a 3-step fix for child discipline that will help with even the most difficult child. This is a MUST read for positive parenting! #positiveparenting #parenting #parentingtips #gentleparenting #discipline #positivediscipline #kidsbehavior #kids\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-grandma.jpg\" alt=\"How picturing this sweet grandma can help you discipline your child\" class=\"wp-image-10241\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-grandma.jpg 640w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-grandma-300x211.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-grandma.jpg\"><figcaption>Photo by <a href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/sflovestory\/3137884317\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">K P<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-can-you-un-stick-a-bad-label\">Can You Un-Stick a Bad Label?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>On the day I told my daughter she was being &ldquo;mean,&rdquo; I saw the power of my words in her drooping shoulders and tear-streaked face. And I got it, <strong>finally<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Later, my research would take me to IRA. But in that moment, I understood what I&rsquo;d done.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I dropped to my knees in front of Bailey and put a finger under her chin to lift it. Looked into her eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;You aren&rsquo;t mean, Bailey,&rdquo; I said. &ldquo;You aren&rsquo;t mean. I&rsquo;m sorry I said that.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;I&rsquo;m a nice person,&rdquo; she repeated.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;Yes. You <em>are<\/em> a nice person.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;I want a hug,&rdquo; she said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I opened my arms, and we melted into each other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And even though I wish I could take back what I said, I&rsquo;m grateful to my preschooler for the <strong>hard<\/strong> parenting lesson she taught me that day: My words shape my child&rsquo;s vision of herself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If I want her to grow up to be a kind, helpful, thoughtful person, calling her (or her actions) &ldquo;mean&rdquo; certainly isn&rsquo;t helping. Tearing people down isn&rsquo;t what you do when you want to people to learn and grow. <em>Even if<\/em> those people happen to be three feet tall.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I pulled back from our hug to see whether Bailey was starting to calm down. Her eyes were still rimmed in red, but the tears had stopped.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;Will you forgive me?&rdquo; I asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She nodded, and <strong>then<\/strong> a pudgy baby hand appeared between us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Little Charlie, holding out a LEGO that had been in the coveted bowl. A peace offering.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Bailey smiled. &ldquo;Thank you, Charlie.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And in response, Charlie did the hand sign for &ldquo;thank you.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>An impromptu exchange of kindness between a three-year-old and a one-year-old.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I smiled big and scooped Charlie into my lap next to Bailey. &ldquo;You guys are awesome sauce.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Now, that&rsquo;s a label I don&rsquo;t mind sticking around for 30 years.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group\"><div class=\"wp-block-group__inner-container is-layout-flow wp-block-group-is-layout-flow\">\n<h6 class=\"wp-block-heading after-entry-cta\" id=\"h-before-you-go-get-my-free-cheat-sheet-75-nbsp-positive-phrases-every-child-needs-to-hear\">Before you go, get my FREE cheat sheet: <a href=\"#get-printable-positive-words\" class=\"modal-trigger\">75&nbsp;Positive Phrases Every Child Needs to Hear<\/a><\/h6>\n\n\n<style>#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-blocks-modal-link{color:var(--global-palette2, #2B6CB0);border-radius:0px;font-size:16px;line-height:24px;border-width:0px 0px 0px 0px;padding:0px 0px 0px 0px;margin:0px 0px 0px 0px;}#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-blocks-modal-link:hover, #kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-blocks-modal-link:focus{color:#f96d60;}#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-overlay, #kt-target-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-overlay, .kb-modal-content19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-overlay{background:rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.6);}#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-overlay, #kt-target-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-overlay, .kb-modal-content19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-overlay{-ms-flex-pack:center;justify-content:center;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;}#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container, #kt-target-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container, .kb-modal-content19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container{width:100%;max-width:700px;-ms-flex-pack:flex-start;justify-content:flex-start;text-align:left;-ms-flex-align:flex-start;align-items:flex-start;}#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container, #kt-target-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container, .kb-modal-content19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container{padding-top:30px;padding-right:30px;padding-bottom:30px;padding-left:30px;margin-top:10px;margin-right:10px;margin-bottom:10px;margin-left:10px;}#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container, #kt-target-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container, .kb-modal-content19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container{background:var(--global-palette9, #ffffff);border-top-left-radius:3px;border-top-right-radius:3px;border-bottom-right-radius:3px;border-bottom-left-radius:3px;border-top:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);border-right:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);border-bottom:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);border-left:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);}#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-close svg, #kt-target-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-close svg, .kb-modal-content19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-close svg{width:24px;height:24px;}@media all and (max-width: 1024px){#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container, #kt-target-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container, .kb-modal-content19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container{width:100%;border-top:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);border-right:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);border-bottom:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);border-left:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);}}@media all and (max-width: 1024px){#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-close svg, #kt-target-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-close svg, .kb-modal-content19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-close svg{width:24px;height:24px;}}@media all and (max-width: 767px){#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container, #kt-target-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container, .kb-modal-content19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-container{width:100%;border-top:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);border-right:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);border-bottom:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);border-left:0px solid var(--global-palette3, #1A202C);}#kt-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-close svg, #kt-target-modal19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-close svg, .kb-modal-content19878_ef407f-13 .kt-modal-close svg{width:24px;height:24px;}}<\/style>\n<div class=\"wp-block-kadence-modal aligncenter kt-modal-linkalign-center\" id=\"kt-modal19878_ef407f-13\"><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-want-more\">Want More?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>If you&rsquo;ve had a negative interaction with your child, the Magic 5:1 Ratio will help you recover: <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/how-to-connect-with-your-child\/\">Why Every Parent Should Know the Magic 5:1 Ratio &ndash; And How to Do It<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-your-turn\">Your Turn<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>How do you keep your calm when you discipline your child? Share in a comment below!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Inside: When you discipline your child, remember this 3-step trick that will help you get through those tough parenting moments while also helping your child learn. We&rsquo;d just collected my third grader from school and made it back home again, which meant my two littlest ones had been held hostage in the car for an&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":10247,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[4504],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10209","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-parenting-discipline"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium 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