{"id":11309,"date":"2017-05-25T23:00:16","date_gmt":"2017-05-26T04:00:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/?p=11309"},"modified":"2023-01-31T07:28:05","modified_gmt":"2023-01-31T13:28:05","slug":"negative-self-talk-in-children","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/negative-self-talk-in-children\/","title":{"rendered":"One Powerful Word That Will Inspire a Child Who Says, &#8216;I Can&#8217;t&#8217;"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"meta-desc\">Inside: The most common response to negative self-talk in children doesn&rsquo;t work. When your kid says, &ldquo;I can&rsquo;t do it,&rdquo; use this powerful word to inspire them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When one of my kiddos was preschool-aged and was learning how to do something new, she would stick her little tongue out to the side and figure it out, no matter how long it took her. (And she <em>definitely<\/em> wouldn&rsquo;t accept help from me.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But one day, Bailey said something under her breath that caught me off guard &ndash; and not in a good way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>My husband was peeling carrots for dinner, and she walked up to him with a big smile on her face. &ldquo;Can I do that?&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She&rsquo;d <strong>never<\/strong> peeled anything before, so my mama heart squeezed at the thought of a sharp peeler in her tiny hands. <em>What if she slips and cuts herself? What if she slices off a chunk of her thumb? What if we end up in the ER?!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Luckily, my husband is way more chill than I am, so he said, &ldquo;Sure.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I caught Tyler&rsquo;s eye and raised an eyebrow at him, and he just smiled.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>He got Bailey set up at the breakfast table with a bag of carrots and the peeler, and he gave her a quick safety lesson in Vegetable Peeling 101.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When she picked up the peeler, I felt an adrenaline <strong>surge<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But I knew enough not to hover, so I hung back in the kitchen and didn&rsquo;t say a word.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"yellowbox\"><strong>Download:<\/strong> Get these fun <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/mindset-posters?utm_source=topbox&amp;utm_medium=post&amp;utm_campaign=mindset\">coloring posters<\/a> for your child to teach them the power of hard work and sticking with a problem.<\/p>\n\n\n<style>.kb-table-of-content-nav.kb-table-of-content-id_8d2321-ef .kb-table-of-content-wrap{padding-top:0px;padding-right:0px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;border-top-width:0px;border-right-width:0px;border-bottom-width:0px;border-left-width:0px;}.kb-table-of-content-nav.kb-table-of-content-id_8d2321-ef .kb-table-of-contents-title-wrap{padding-top:0px;padding-right:0px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;}.kb-table-of-content-nav.kb-table-of-content-id_8d2321-ef .kb-table-of-contents-title{font-weight:regular;font-style:normal;text-transform:uppercase;}.kb-table-of-content-nav.kb-table-of-content-id_8d2321-ef .kb-table-of-content-wrap .kb-table-of-content-list{font-weight:regular;font-style:normal;margin-top:var(--global-kb-spacing-sm, 1.5rem);margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:0px;margin-left:0px;}<\/style>\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-and-then-she-said-it\">And Then She Said It<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Bailey stuck her little tongue out to the side and concentrated on running the peeler against the carrot.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Slow, deliberate. Safe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I moved closer and opened my mouth to say, &ldquo;You&rsquo;re doing it!&rdquo; But <strong>before<\/strong> I could get the words out, she said something under her breath that stopped me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;I&rsquo;m not good at this,&rdquo; she said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She let the peeler and carrot fall to the table, and her chin dropped to her chest.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And I just stood there, my mouth open but no words coming out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What happened to my determined, persistent little learner? Since when did she <em>talk down<\/em> to herself?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Related: <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/secret-phrase-better-student\/\">Here&rsquo;s the Secret Phrase to Turn Your Kid Into an Amazing Student<\/a> {Printable}<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" data-pin-id=\"128000814395183269\" data-pin-description=\"A growth mindset is important for your child's future success in life, but it's easy to fall into the fixed mindset. The magic word yet will help you inspire grit in your child and stop negative self talk. But here's the PROBLEM: How you say yet is crucial. Click to learn the most important part most parents miss, plus how to boost self confidence and positive self talk for kids. #growthmindset #education #positiveparenting #learning #parenting #parentingtips #selftalk #mindset #selfesteem\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-sad-kid-steps.jpg\" alt=\"The impact of negative self-talk in children\" class=\"wp-image-10238\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-sad-kid-steps.jpg 640w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-sad-kid-steps-300x200.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/discipline-your-child-sad-kid-steps.jpg\"><figcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\">Photo by <a href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/donnieray\/25771614245\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Donnie Ray Jones<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-the-danger-of-negative-self-talk-in-children\">The Danger of Negative Self-Talk in Children<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Many parents instinctively know that calling a child &ldquo;stupid&rdquo; could influence that child&rsquo;s idea of how smart they are and cause them to behave differently when learning something new. But as it turns out, a child calling <em>themselves<\/em> &ldquo;stupid&rdquo; can have the <strong>same<\/strong> effect.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Let&rsquo;s suppose you&rsquo;re back in high school, and you&rsquo;re nervous about a big science test coming up. You tell yourself, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll probably fail anyway, so why even study?&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>By telling yourself that, you&rsquo;ve given up before the test even happened and envisioned a future for yourself where you&rsquo;ll skip studying. If you do skip studying, you&rsquo;ll have increased the chances that you&rsquo;ll fail the test.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Instead, consider what would happen if you told yourself, &ldquo;I&rsquo;m nervous about the science test, but studying will help me feel more confident.&rdquo; You&rsquo;d be <strong>more<\/strong> likely to study and therefore more likely to do well on the test.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This phenomenon is called a <a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Self-fulfilling_prophecy\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">self-fulfilling prophecy<\/a>. In other words, when you declare something like this to yourself or another person, it&rsquo;s enough to influence your behavior to fulfill that declaration of &ldquo;truth.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Related: <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/7-ways-better-student\/\">7 Surprising Ways to Help Your Kid Do Better in School, According to Science<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-large\"><a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/child-anxiety-checklist-sad-child.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" data-pin-id=\"128000814395183269\" data-pin-description=\"A growth mindset is important for your child's future success in life, but it's easy to fall into the fixed mindset. The magic word yet will help you inspire grit in your child and stop negative self talk. But here's the PROBLEM: How you say yet is crucial. Click to learn the most important part most parents miss, plus how to boost self confidence and positive self talk for kids. #growthmindset #education #positiveparenting #learning #parenting #parentingtips #selftalk #mindset #selfesteem\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/child-anxiety-checklist-sad-child.jpg\" alt=\"When kids use negative self-talk, this is what happens\" class=\"wp-image-13654\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/child-anxiety-checklist-sad-child.jpg 640w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/child-anxiety-checklist-sad-child-300x200.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/child-anxiety-checklist-sad-child.jpg\"><\/a><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-but-the-most-common-response-doesn-t-work\">But the Most Common Response Doesn&rsquo;t Work<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>When kids engage in negative self-talk, it may sound like:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>I&rsquo;m no good at this.<br>I can&rsquo;t do it, it&rsquo;s too hard.<br>I&rsquo;ll never learn how to read.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Because we love our kids more than anything else in the world, our gut reaction as a parent is to convince them that their words aren&rsquo;t true:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>You <strong>are<\/strong> good at this!<br>Yes, you <strong>can<\/strong> do it!<br>You <strong>will<\/strong> learn to read. I believe in you!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But have you noticed that when you try to fight your child&rsquo;s negative self-talk with your own positive words, it doesn&rsquo;t work?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I learned that lesson the hard way with my oldest child. It took me a while to realize that when I unleashed a slew of positive affirmations, it actually made her attitude <strong>worse<\/strong>. She&rsquo;d furrow her brow, cross her arms on her chest, and shut herself off from me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I&rsquo;d unknowingly turned her frustration into a power struggle instead of addressing the heart of the issue.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-this-is-what-we-re-missing\">This Is What We&rsquo;re Missing<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Here&rsquo;s what your child is <em>really<\/em> saying when they talk bad about themselves:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>I&rsquo;m frustrated.<br>I feel bad that I made a mistake.<br>I&rsquo;m scared I won&rsquo;t be able to figure this out.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When we respond with positive affirmations, this is what our kids hear:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Don&rsquo;t be frustrated!<br>Don&rsquo;t feel bad!<br>Don&rsquo;t be scared!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I don&rsquo;t know about you, but when I&rsquo;m feeling those emotions and someone responds by telling me <strong>not<\/strong> to feel those emotions, I don&rsquo;t take it very well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Which means the real problem is that we&rsquo;re not stopping to <em>empathize<\/em> with our kids&rsquo; big and scary emotions. In that moment when your child gets easily frustrated and their confidence is shaken, they don&rsquo;t feel heard.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So what <em>can<\/em> you do in that moment when you hear your sweet child saying mean things about themselves?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Say one simple word.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Get your copy now: <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/mindset-posters?utm_source=related&amp;utm_medium=post&amp;utm_campaign=mindset\">9 Best Mindset Posters That Will Inspire Your Child to Keep Trying<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"428\" data-pin-id=\"128000814395183269\" data-pin-description=\"A growth mindset is important for your child's future success in life, but it's easy to fall into the fixed mindset. The magic word yet will help you inspire grit in your child and stop negative self talk. But here's the PROBLEM: How you say yet is crucial. Click to learn the most important part most parents miss, plus how to boost self confidence and positive self talk for kids. #growthmindset #education #positiveparenting #learning #parenting #parentingtips #selftalk #mindset #selfesteem\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-looking-down.jpg\" alt=\"One word that will inspire positive self talk for kids\" class=\"wp-image-11328\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-looking-down.jpg 640w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-looking-down-300x201.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-looking-down.jpg\"><figcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\">Photo by <a href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/donnieray\/32053329763\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Donnie Ray Jones<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group\"><div class=\"wp-block-group__inner-container is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"how-to\">One Word That Will Flip Your Child&rsquo;s Negative Self-Talk<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>A while ago, I stumbled on one word that helps me catch myself in that moment so I can empathize with my child and and help her move forward in a positive way:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>When your child says, &ldquo;I&rsquo;m no good at this&rdquo; or &ldquo;I can&rsquo;t do it,&rdquo;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>You say, &ldquo;&hellip;<em>yet<\/em>.&rdquo;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ted.com\/talks\/carol_dweck_the_power_of_believing_that_you_can_improve\/transcript?language=en\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Adding this one word<\/a> builds your child&rsquo;s confidence by giving them a vision of their future where they do &ldquo;get&rdquo; it. They&rsquo;ll make choices that will help them <strong>live up<\/strong> to that new &ldquo;truth.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Which means this little word is important for your child to hear, but it&rsquo;s just as important for you. Because saying &ldquo;&hellip;yet&rdquo; will stop you from spewing out positive affirmations that will just make your child dig their heels further into the muck of negative self-talk. <\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignright is-resized\"><img decoding=\"async\" data-pin-id=\"128000814397480777\" data-pin-description=\"A growth mindset is important for your child's future success in life, but it's easy to fall into the fixed mindset. The magic word yet will help you inspire grit in your child and stop negative self talk. But here's the PROBLEM: How you say yet is crucial. Click to learn the most important part most parents miss, plus how to boost self confidence and positive self talk for kids. #growthmindset #education #positiveparenting #learning #parenting #parentingtips #selftalk #mindset #selfesteem\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-pin-v3.png\" alt=\"One Powerful Word That Will Inspire a Kid Who Says, &quot;I Can't Do It!&quot;\" class=\"wp-image-15952\" width=\"200\" height=\"500\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-pin-v3.png 800w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-pin-v3-120x300.png 120w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-pin-v3-410x1024.png 410w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-pin-v3-768x1920.png 768w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-pin-v3-614x1536.png 614w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 200px) 100vw, 200px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-pin-v3.png\"><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n<p>For the best results when teaching optimism, grit, and stick-to-it-iveness, you&rsquo;ll want to follow up &ldquo;yet&rdquo; with a little more guidance:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>Yet<\/strong> &ndash; When you hear your child engage in negative self-talk, close the distance between you, look them in the eye, and repeat their statement but add &ldquo;&hellip;yet&rdquo; to the end. Depending on the statement, it may work better to say &ldquo;&hellip;not yet.&rdquo;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Empathize<\/strong> &ndash; Let them know you hear their frustration by saying &ldquo;I can see that you&rsquo;re frustrated.&rdquo; Or &ldquo;It seems like you&rsquo;re nervous that you won&rsquo;t figure this out.&rdquo; Or &ldquo;You feel bad that you made a mistake.&rdquo; You might also follow this up with a question to get them talking about what they&rsquo;re stuck on, like &ldquo;Can you show me the part that&rsquo;s hard for you?&rdquo;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Turn it around<\/strong> &ndash; Now, ask your child a question to engage their problem-solving skills so they can move forward in a positive way. For example, &ldquo;How can you try this a different way?&rdquo; or &ldquo;What part isn&rsquo;t making sense yet?&rdquo;<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p>And all you have to remember is <strong>YET<\/strong>. <em>Yet, Empathize, Turn it around<\/em>.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-can-one-word-stop-negative-self-talk-in-children\">Can One Word Stop Negative Self-Talk in Children?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>To be clear, we can&rsquo;t wave our magic mom wands and immediately stop all negative self-talk in children.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But adding &ldquo;&hellip;yet&rdquo; is a simple and positive response that can help nip negative self-talk in the bud and flip it into a <strong>positive<\/strong> mantra for your child.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>On that day that my preschooler threw down the vegetable peeler and that sad little carrot, she&rsquo;d said &ldquo;I&rsquo;m not good at this.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I wanted to say, &ldquo;It&rsquo;s the first time you&rsquo;ve ever tried to do this! You&rsquo;ll get better! Just keep trying!&rdquo; Which would have turned the whole situation into an argument with us on opposite sides.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But <strong>instead<\/strong>, I caught myself and said, &ldquo;&hellip;yet.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She looked up at me, and I moved forward to close the gap between us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Bending down so we were at eye level with each other, I said, &ldquo;You&rsquo;re frustrated because you&rsquo;re learning something new, and that&rsquo;s hard.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She nodded.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;You&rsquo;re not feeling good at this <em>yet<\/em>.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;Yeah,&rdquo; she said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I reached out with one hand and rubbed her shoulder. &ldquo;How could you get better at it?&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She shrugged, and I waited, keeping my mouth shut.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>After a few seconds, her eyes <strong>lit up<\/strong> with that determination I know and love, and she sat up straight in her chair. &ldquo;I could use a knife.&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>My eyes got big, and I heard my husband chuckling in the kitchen behind us. Not exactly the direction I wanted things to move in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&ldquo;You could. That&rsquo;s true.&rdquo; Buying myself time. &ldquo;But&hellip;using a knife would take even more practice to learn than the vegetable peeler. Can you think of anything else that would help you with the peeler?&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She tilted her head to one side, thinking. &ldquo;Can you show me again?&rdquo;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I smiled and picked up the peeler. The power of <em>yet<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group\"><div class=\"wp-block-group__inner-container is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\"><div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/mindset-posters?utm_source=image&amp;utm_medium=post&amp;utm_campaign=mindset\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"423\" data-pin-id=\"128000814395183269\" data-pin-description=\"A growth mindset is important for your child's future success in life, but it's easy to fall into the fixed mindset. The magic word yet will help you inspire grit in your child and stop negative self talk. But here's the PROBLEM: How you say yet is crucial. Click to learn the most important part most parents miss, plus how to boost self confidence and positive self talk for kids. #growthmindset #education #positiveparenting #learning #parenting #parentingtips #selftalk #mindset #selfesteem\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/growth-mindset-posters-double-1-med.jpg\" alt=\"Growth mindset posters that will inspire your kid to keep trying\" class=\"wp-image-12513\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/growth-mindset-posters-double-1-med.jpg 640w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/growth-mindset-posters-double-1-med-300x198.jpg 300w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/growth-mindset-posters-double-1-med-340x225.jpg 340w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/growth-mindset-posters-double-1-med.jpg\"><\/a><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-print-these-coloring-posters-to-change-your-kid-s-mindset\">Print These Coloring Posters to Change Your Kid&rsquo;s Mindset<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>I&rsquo;ve tried <em>countless<\/em> parenting techniques to encourage a growth mindset in my kids &ndash; some of them total duds.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But I wish I&rsquo;d created these <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/mindset-posters?utm_source=body&amp;utm_medium=post&amp;utm_campaign=mindset\">special mindset posters<\/a> much earlier because the results have been <strong>fast<\/strong> and impressive with my grade-schooler <em>and<\/em> my preschooler. (Even my toddler repeats the growth mindset mantras she hears from her older sisters!)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Thanks to these mindset posters, my kids have internalized <strong>powerful<\/strong>, positive mantras to remind them that hard work and sticking with a problem will help their brains grow &ndash; and will help them become the people they want to be. (Check out the <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/growth-mindset-posters\/\">science behind these growth mindset posters<\/a> that makes them so powerful with kids.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Download your own set of <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/mindset-posters?utm_source=body&amp;utm_medium=post&amp;utm_campaign=mindset\">mindset posters here<\/a>, and you&rsquo;ll unlock your child&rsquo;s true potential for working hard, not giving up, and learning from their mistakes.<\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/mindset-posters?utm_source=image&amp;utm_medium=post&amp;utm_campaign=mindset\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"415\" data-pin-id=\"128000814395183269\" data-pin-description=\"A growth mindset is important for your child's future success in life, but it's easy to fall into the fixed mindset. The magic word yet will help you inspire grit in your child and stop negative self talk. But here's the PROBLEM: How you say yet is crucial. Click to learn the most important part most parents miss, plus how to boost self confidence and positive self talk for kids. #growthmindset #education #positiveparenting #learning #parenting #parentingtips #selftalk #mindset #selfesteem\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/growth-mindset-posters-cover-med-640.png\" alt=\"Mindset posters that will inspire your child to keep trying\" class=\"wp-image-12520\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/growth-mindset-posters-cover-med-640.png 640w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/growth-mindset-posters-cover-med-640-300x195.png 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/growth-mindset-posters-cover-med-640.png\"><\/a><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n<h6 class=\"after-entry-cta wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-get-your-copy-now-9-best-mindset-posters-that-will-inspire-your-child-to-keep-trying\">Get your copy now: <a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/mindset-posters?utm_source=bottombox&amp;utm_medium=post&amp;utm_campaign=mindset\">9 Best Mindset Posters That Will Inspire Your Child to Keep Trying<\/a><\/h6>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-want-more\">Want More?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>If your child struggles with negative self-talk, they may have a fixed mindset when it comes to learning new things. Get more tried-and-true tricks to nurture a growth mindset here:<\/p>\n\n\n<style>.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kadence-post-image{padding-top:0px;padding-right:0px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kt-post-grid-wrap{gap:30px 30px;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kt-blocks-post-grid-item{border-top-left-radius:0px;border-top-right-radius:0px;border-bottom-right-radius:0px;border-bottom-left-radius:0px;overflow:hidden;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kt-blocks-post-grid-item .kt-blocks-post-grid-item-inner{padding-top:15px;padding-right:25px;padding-bottom:25px;padding-left:25px;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kt-blocks-post-grid-item header{padding-top:0px;padding-right:0px;padding-bottom:10px;padding-left:0px;margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:0px;margin-left:0px;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kt-blocks-post-grid-item .entry-title{padding-top:10px;padding-right:0px;padding-bottom:5px;padding-left:0px;margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:0px;margin-left:0px;font-size:20px;line-height:30px;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kt-blocks-post-grid-item .kt-blocks-post-top-meta{color:#777777;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kt-blocks-post-grid-item .kt-blocks-post-top-meta a{color:#777777;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kt-blocks-post-grid-item .kt-blocks-post-top-meta a:hover{color:#444444;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .entry-content{padding-top:0px;padding-right:0px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:0px;margin-left:0px;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kt-blocks-post-footer{color:#777777;border-top-width:0px;border-right-width:0px;border-bottom-width:0px;border-left-width:0px;padding-top:0px;padding-right:0px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:0px;margin-left:0px;font-size:12px;line-height:20px;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .entry-content:after{height:0px;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kt-blocks-post-footer a{color:#777777;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kt-blocks-post-footer a:hover{color:#444444;}.kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d .kb-filter-item{border-top-width:0px;border-right-width:0px;border-bottom-width:2px;border-left-width:0px;padding-top:5px;padding-right:8px;padding-bottom:5px;padding-left:8px;margin-top:0px;margin-right:10px;margin-bottom:0px;margin-left:0px;}<\/style><div class=\"wp-block-kadence-postgrid kt-blocks-post-loop-block aligncenter kt-post-loop_9072f0-1d kt-post-grid-layout-grid \"><div class=\"kt-post-grid-layout-grid-wrap kt-post-grid-wrap\" data-columns-xxl=\"3\" data-columns-xl=\"3\" data-columns-md=\"3\" data-columns-sm=\"2\" data-columns-xs=\"1\" data-columns-ss=\"1\" data-item-selector=\".kt-post-masonry-item\" aria-label=\"Post Carousel\"><article class=\"kt-blocks-post-grid-item post-22078 post type-post status-publish format-standard has-post-thumbnail hentry category-parenting-growth-mindset\"><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-grid-item-inner-wrap kt-feat-image-align-top kt-feat-image-mobile-align-top\"><div class=\"kadence-post-image\"><div class=\"kadence-post-image-intrisic kt-image-ratio-66-67\" style=\"padding-bottom:66.67%;\"><div class=\"kadence-post-image-inner-intrisic\"><a aria-hidden=\"true\" tabindex=\"-1\" role=\"presentation\" href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/words-of-encouragement-for-kids\/\" aria-label=\"The Most Encouraging Words for Kids: 125 Phrases That Actually Work\" class=\"kadence-post-image-inner-wrap\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"195\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/words-of-encouragement-for-kids-feature-300x195.jpg\" class=\"attachment-medium size-medium wp-post-image\" alt=\"The Most Encouraging Words for Kids: 125 Phrases That Actually Work\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/words-of-encouragement-for-kids-feature-300x195.jpg 300w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/words-of-encouragement-for-kids-feature-150x97.jpg 150w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/words-of-encouragement-for-kids-feature.jpg 740w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/words-of-encouragement-for-kids-feature.jpg\"><\/a><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-grid-item-inner\"><header><h3 class=\"entry-title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/words-of-encouragement-for-kids\/\">The Most Encouraging Words for Kids: 125 Phrases That Actually Work<\/a><\/h3><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-top-meta\"><\/div><\/header><div class=\"entry-content\"><\/div><footer class=\"kt-blocks-post-footer\"><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-footer-left\"><\/div><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-footer-right\"><\/div><\/footer><\/div><\/div><\/article><article class=\"kt-blocks-post-grid-item post-6008 post type-post status-publish format-standard has-post-thumbnail hentry category-parenting-growth-mindset category-printables\"><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-grid-item-inner-wrap kt-feat-image-align-top kt-feat-image-mobile-align-top\"><div class=\"kadence-post-image\"><div class=\"kadence-post-image-intrisic kt-image-ratio-66-67\" style=\"padding-bottom:66.67%;\"><div class=\"kadence-post-image-inner-intrisic\"><a aria-hidden=\"true\" tabindex=\"-1\" role=\"presentation\" href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/kid-gives-up\/\" aria-label=\"The Most Powerful Way to Respond When Your Kid Gives Up\" class=\"kadence-post-image-inner-wrap\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"195\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/kid-gives-up-feature-v2-300x195.jpg\" class=\"attachment-medium size-medium wp-post-image\" alt=\"What to Do When Your Kid Gives Up\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/kid-gives-up-feature-v2-300x195.jpg 300w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/kid-gives-up-feature-v2.jpg 740w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/kid-gives-up-feature-v2.jpg\"><\/a><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-grid-item-inner\"><header><h3 class=\"entry-title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/kid-gives-up\/\">The Most Powerful Way to Respond When Your Kid Gives Up<\/a><\/h3><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-top-meta\"><\/div><\/header><div class=\"entry-content\"><\/div><footer class=\"kt-blocks-post-footer\"><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-footer-left\"><\/div><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-footer-right\"><\/div><\/footer><\/div><\/div><\/article><article class=\"kt-blocks-post-grid-item post-4462 post type-post status-publish format-standard has-post-thumbnail hentry category-parenting-growth-mindset category-printables\"><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-grid-item-inner-wrap kt-feat-image-align-top kt-feat-image-mobile-align-top\"><div class=\"kadence-post-image\"><div class=\"kadence-post-image-intrisic kt-image-ratio-66-67\" style=\"padding-bottom:66.67%;\"><div class=\"kadence-post-image-inner-intrisic\"><a aria-hidden=\"true\" tabindex=\"-1\" role=\"presentation\" href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/secret-phrase-better-student\/\" aria-label=\"Here&rsquo;s the Secret Phrase to Turn Your Kid Into an Amazing Student\" class=\"kadence-post-image-inner-wrap\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"195\" src=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/02\/student-feature-300x195.jpg\" class=\"attachment-medium size-medium wp-post-image\" alt=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/02\/student-feature-300x195.jpg 300w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/02\/student-feature-736x477.jpg 736w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/02\/student-feature-450x292.jpg 450w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/02\/student-feature.jpg 740w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/02\/student-feature-500x324.jpg 500w, https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/02\/student-feature-617x400.jpg 617w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" data-pin-media=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/02\/student-feature.jpg\"><\/a><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-grid-item-inner\"><header><h3 class=\"entry-title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/secret-phrase-better-student\/\">Here&rsquo;s the Secret Phrase to Turn Your Kid Into an Amazing Student<\/a><\/h3><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-top-meta\"><\/div><\/header><div class=\"entry-content\"><\/div><footer class=\"kt-blocks-post-footer\"><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-footer-left\"><\/div><div class=\"kt-blocks-post-footer-right\"><\/div><\/footer><\/div><\/div><\/article><\/div><\/div><!-- .wp-block-kadence-postgrid -->\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-your-turn\">Your Turn<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Have you found any helpful tricks for responding to negative self-talk in children? Share in a comment below!<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Inside: The most common response to negative self-talk in children doesn&rsquo;t work. When your kid says, &ldquo;I can&rsquo;t do it,&rdquo; use this powerful word to inspire them. When one of my kiddos was preschool-aged and was learning how to do something new, she would stick her little tongue out to the side and figure it&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":14843,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[4506,23],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11309","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-parenting-growth-mindset","category-printables"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v25.0 (Yoast SEO v25.0) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>One Powerful Word That Will Stop Negative Self-Talk in Children<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The most common response to negative self-talk in children doesn&#039;t work. When your kid says, &quot;I can&#039;t do it,&quot; do this to inspire them.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/negative-self-talk-in-children\/\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Kelly Holmes, Certified Parent Educator\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"10 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/negative-self-talk-in-children\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/negative-self-talk-in-children\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Kelly Holmes, Certified Parent Educator\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/#\/schema\/person\/930987755e95179c5b9f3335e3c8ce57\"},\"headline\":\"One Powerful Word That Will Inspire a Child Who Says, &#8216;I Can&#8217;t&#8217;\",\"datePublished\":\"2017-05-26T04:00:16+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2023-01-31T13:28:05+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/negative-self-talk-in-children\/\"},\"wordCount\":1863,\"commentCount\":57,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/negative-self-talk-in-children\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-feature-v2.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"Growth Mindset\",\"Printables\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/negative-self-talk-in-children\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/negative-self-talk-in-children\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/negative-self-talk-in-children\/\",\"name\":\"One Powerful Word That Will Stop Negative Self-Talk in Children\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/negative-self-talk-in-children\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/negative-self-talk-in-children\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/happyyouhappyfamily.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/negative-self-talk-in-children-feature-v2.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2017-05-26T04:00:16+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2023-01-31T13:28:05+00:00\",\"description\":\"The most common response to negative self-talk in children doesn't work. 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