If you see me and a friend out in public having a good time, please know this friendship didn\u2019t happen by accident. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I know it looks simple. I know it looks comfortable. I know it looks easy. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And it is all those things, but only because we\u2019ve done the work. Only because we\u2019ve fought for this thing, we\u2019ve shown up for this thing, we\u2019ve valued this thing. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Please don\u2019t look at this friendship and think it happened by magic. Please don\u2019t think we\u2019re just lucky or special. (Although maybe there was a little of that).<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This friendship happened with love and intentionality.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by countless hours of sharing our hearts (and deep gut laughs). <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by choosing each other over and over again. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by listening and really HEARING each other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by having honest conversations when it was needed (instead of letting splinters of hurt\/miscommunication grow deep and fester).<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by making time for each other (even when we were busy and overwhelmed).<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by being humble (and apologizing) when we got it wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by giving the benefit of the doubt and having each other\u2019s backs. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by loving each other well (and our kids, spouses, parents and siblings, because we also chose each other\u2019s family). <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by buying each other random cards and gifts just to show we care. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by sending a million different texts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by years of creating history and shared stories (and inside jokes that still make us double over with laughter). <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by being flexible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I happened by seeing each other at our best and seeing each other at our worst, and loving each other still.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by inviting and pursuing (even when the sink was full of dishes and crumbs were on the floor).<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by celebrating and cheering for each other with our whole hearts. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by learning how to communicate well (and what we each needed to hear when we were having a hard time).<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It happened by showing up for each other in the very hardest moments of our lives and sitting in that pain, because there\u2019s nowhere we\u2019d rather be. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I know it\u2019s easy to see a friendship from the outside looking in and think it\u2019s easy, or simple, or just fell into our lap. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But it didn\u2019t. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
This friendship was built on choices.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A million different times of choosing each other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
What you\u2019re seeing is the fruit, but let me tell you there is a story behind this magic. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And if I can have it, you can have it too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Love,<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Jess<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Photo by Yanapi Senaud<\/p>\n\n\n\n